March 3, 2007 2:51pm CST
When you ask a housewife, accountant, and lawyer what 2+2 is, what do they give you? The housewife says "Four." The accountant says "It's either three or four, let me run it through my spreadsheet again." Thelawyer closes the shutters, turns down the lights, and whispers "What do you want it to be?"
6 Mar 07
Lovemaking Tips For Older People 1. Put bi-focals on . double check that you're with the right partner. 2. Set alarm on your clock for 2 minutes... in case you doze off in the middle. 3. Set the mood with lighting . turn them ALL OFF! 4. Make sure you put 911 on your speed dial before you begin. 5. Write partner's name on your hand in case you can't remember what to scream out at the end. 6. Keep extra polygrip close by so your teeth don't end up under the bed. 7. Have heating pads, tylenol, splints and crutches ready in case you actually complete the act.