Do you think a difficult relationship that takes a lot of work is a good sign?

All relationships take a lot of work. If you haven't learned that you are not ready for any relationship. As to the source of reltionship difficulties, the easiest way to see who is the problem, is to look in the mirror.

I think you have to work at relationships. Over time people change and if you don't deal with the change you will end up with trouble. There is a point where you are working to hard, I mean if everything is a struggle, but your average arguments and working at it are just fine. I think that if there is no work it is because the couple are not being honest with themselves or each other. I used to think work meant it wasn't working but then I got into a great relationship and even though it is great and we love each ther dearly, we still do have to work at it from time to time.

I agree with the posters that say you have to work at relationships. Nothing thats worth anything comes easy, relationships most of all. It takes learning, co-operation, compromise, sacrificies, and constant effort. But the rewards are great!

I would agree most relationships do require a little work. I do feel if a relationship requires a lot of hard work than it's probably not worth the effort. I saw a little bit of a wife swapping show last week where the wife was doing EVERYTHING for her husband. She went as far as getting up an hour earlier to make his breakfast, pack his a lunch and start his car. Plus she laid out his clothes. That's a little bit extreme. LOL

I'd say yes and no to both statements. A relationship that both partners are working hard means that they do care and want each other, so they are working hard to make things better and to keep it up. On the other hand, if only one partner is trying to make the relationship work while the other makes less effort then it is not right. Imagine having to always please your partner just so that he/she would stay with you, it is tiring and if he/she is not willing to make any effort towards you, then it's not a healthy relationship. I have a friend who had a very needy girlfriend. She never does anything for him but he is always running after her, doing everything for her from buying her groceries, face creams, pays for everything, cleans her room for her. She clearly did not put much effort into it while he was working very hard. Relationships should flow smoothly from both partners' sides. Whether it is a lot of work or a little bit of work, I think that as long as two partners are both working, it is a good sign, at least they are giving it a go, if it fails it fails but at least they've both tried.

Well, every relationship takes a certain degree of hard work. People are not the same, and the conflicts that arise have to be dealt with and worked through. If a relationship is all conflict and no peace, though, I would have to say it is not that good of a relationship.