Do You Spoil Your Child?

The Little Love of My Life - This is my baby
United States
March 7, 2007 3:30pm CST
My mom said that I'm spoiling my son. Now I will admit that I'm not a strict mother that is big on discipline. My bf thinks mostly everything that the baby does is funny, and I think everything is cute. I mean, if he's being totally outrageous, one of the two of us will discipline him but that's far and few in between. If he asks for anything he does get it (mostly all of the time). I just don't want him to feel like he can't come to me if he needs anything.His babysitter is the same way with him. Do you think that I'm ruining him? Have you been told that your child is spoiled?
1 person likes this
11 responses
• United States
20 Mar 07
Yes, I believe that letting a child do or have anything they want is spoiling them. It's not about what they want as a child, but how they will react to the word "No" when they become a teenager, or young adult. I'm spoiled myself, and I know how detrimental it can be when a parent or ANYBODY tells me "No".
• United States
26 Mar 07
and he does tend to get a little upset when we do tell him no.
@Gemmygirl1 (2870)
• Australia
14 Mar 07
I think i spoil my little girl, she usually gets something new when we go out - however, we live in the middle of nowhere so it's usually only every other week that we actually get out & go shopping with her Nana. Some of the things she gets though, she doesn't bring home with her, they stay at Nana's house so she has something different to play with when we're there. I also think it depends on the age of your son, my daughter is only 9 months so she's not really understanding all the things she's getting yet, i might back off a little when she's older so she doesn't get used to it but for the moment, there's no harm done! Plus, being an only child for the moment, i like her to have the best i can give her! I know she is spoiled but i don't think she'll be ruined unless we continue it up to & past her realising she'll get her own way!
• United States
14 Mar 07
he just turned 4, and he does know that he can get away with certain things with certain people. with my bf, he gets away with EVERYTHING, but the things he tries with him he doesn't dare try with me. even though i don't punish him, i will correct him with some things (although i think that it should be more).
@missyd79 (3438)
• United States
7 Mar 07
it all depends on how your child acts towards other people and children, i mean if he thinks that he can get away with things that are not acceptable then yes you are spoiling him, but if he shares and doesn't hit spit kick or fight with other children and does what he is told then no you are okay. Just remember children do look for discipline. I mean i always thought that when my son would pass gas and then go mommy i farted was so funny and so did my boyfriend, until he started doing it out in public, then it got embarassing so you just have to watch what you laugh at or think is cute with children because it may come back to haunt you.
1 person likes this
• United States
14 Mar 07
no, he doesn't hit or fight with other children and generally does what he's told. but i've noticed that all of the adults around him (except my mother) bow down to everything that he wants. for example, we were over my best friends house and my son told my best friend's bf to get out of their room so that he could watch cartoons, and my friends bf did it. and you're right, we do need to watch what we laugh about (especially my bf - he laughs at EVERYTHING he does because he thinks it's cute), because i've noticed that he does try certain things out in public.
• Netherlands
7 Mar 07
Yes, people told us that we spoiled our daughter very much. Well, how can you resist such a cute girl with puppy dogs eyes and saying pleaseeee.... ??? Though, aye. My husband and I don't mind reasonable spoiling my daughter while we can. But we also told her if we can't / won't get her what she want because we have a good reason for it. And she understand that and mostly she didn't argue nor cry.
• United States
7 Mar 07
I know that's right! My son has the most amazingly beautiful eyes and lashes and I can't say no to him!
@mzbubblie (3840)
• United States
14 Mar 07
I will admit, for so long I spoiled my son and as he got older and WAY more expensive, I realized I had to teach him to appreicate things and earn the things he want. Now a days if he takes the inititive to do things on his own, bring home good grades, and show respect in and outside the home, I do reward him. I've notice today's kids are not like we were growing up. Maturing quicker and growing into this modern technology, something back in my days were not advanced as it is now... So yes, I will spoil him to a degree, but not to the point everything he sees or ask for I automactically just go out and buy for him..
1 person likes this
@luckly888 (175)
• China
14 Mar 07
spoiling child is not good for children.The parents only tell the child what is right and what is wrong,that's ok.
1 person likes this
@marciascott (25553)
• United States
8 Mar 07
I spoil my Grand-son, he is my first. so alot of times I will spoil him. untill he gets smart mouth. then, I don't want to be bother with him. but I will spoil him.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
8 Mar 07
Yes, somewhat you are ruining him.. You have to instill discipline in your kids, thats what im doing with mine..but sometimes, there are caprices that im giving them its not a bad thing..but spoiling them to the extent of bowing to them, DONT.
1 person likes this
• United States
7 Mar 07
Many people would say I spoil my babies! I do discipline but not with spanking! I seem to buy a least one toy for them everytime we leave the house! I don't think it's too bad!:)
1 person likes this
7 Mar 07
I have been told that I spoil my girls. However they don't get everythign they want, they have to ask politely for things and they are discaplined. I think everyone has a different idea of what spoiling is. Just remember that children need routine and rules in order to learn how to behave and prepare them for life.
• United States
7 Mar 07
I don't give him everything, but most of what he asks for he gets. We can't help it. He does say please and thank you, and is such a pleasant child. He does have somewhat of a routine, and is well behaved, but I'm just not strict with a lot of rules (he's too little).
@tentwo67 (3384)
• United States
2 Apr 07
My son (like his mother before him) is spoiled, but not rotten. However, discipline is hugely important. Not punishing, just establishing and enforcing limits. He needs that from you and you will be doing him a disservice if you don't use discipline with love.