When is it time to quit feeling sorry for someone?

United States
March 12, 2007 4:04pm CST
My son went to school with this boy that was dumped on grandma and grandpa by his parents when he was very young. Grandma and grandpa kept him as long as they could get money for him and then kicked him to the curb. The child was still in high school and sleeping in wrecked car behind the car dealers in our town. When my son told me about him, I felt sorry for him and allowed him to move into our house. At first he was very grateful and thankful for everything we did for him. But that has all changed. He has graduated from high school, doesn't bother to look for a job, if he does happen to get some money, it goes on what he wants or cigarettes, never to help around this house. He is basically a bum. What should I do? I hate to make him homeless again but I honestly cannot afford the kid anymore. If anyone has any suggestions, I am eager to hear them. I need some good advice.
1 person likes this
2 responses
jeweledbluerose
@jeweledbluerose (3061)
• United States
12 Mar 07
It's time than to give him a choice either he starts helping out around the house and become an adult or it's out the door. If you continue to let him have this behaviour he will never get out and do things on his own. It's great that you took him in and provided a loving home for him, but it is time for him to get out and to start taking care of himself. If you have to tell him that you will help him find a job, and a place for him to stay and call his own. He needs to learn that in life things will not always be handed to him, but in order for him to get what he wants in life he needs to work for it in an honest fashion.
1 person likes this
Angel
@nanayangel (7877)
• Philippines
19 Apr 07
I think that you have done enough to help by taking him in until he graduated. I think that you should talk to him and tell him that it's time for him to spread her wings and go look for his path. I think that he should be thankful enough for what you have done and you can explain to him that it's about time for him to learn how to stand up on his own. That you have been helping him and now you think that he's really strong enough and that you know that you can already trust him that he can make good decisions now for his self.