Should I let this "thief" go or should I say something?

United States
March 13, 2007 12:52pm CST
Because of a situation in 2005 I had to move into a motel. I left a futon and a TV with my neighbor. I eventually had to leave in a hurry and couldn't take my things with me. Although I had been in contact with her after that I made no arrangements to pick up my things (my bad)or even talk to her about it. I had to move out of my apartment and in with the neighbor that I left my things with. She gave my futon to her son who needed it in a divorce situation. My TV is now in her room and she is telling everyone that it is hers! I haven't said anything because I don't want to make her angry and kick me out. However, when I leave I at least want to take my tv with me and if possible my futon also (or be paid for it). How should I handle the situation. I realize that not contacting her about the furniture was my fault and I could have handled that part a lot better, but now that I am back, what can I do about it now without ruining a friendship!
1 person likes this
5 responses
• Philippines
15 Mar 07
how close a friendship do you two guys have? first of all, if you did leave in a hurry, if she is a good friend, she would have tried contacting you to inquire what to do about the stuff you left behind. another thing, she wouldn't have just assumed that the stuff you left behind are now hers. especially if the things in question have a bit of monetary value. but it is up to you though on how much value you place on the stuff she "stole." maybe you could start by asking her nicely if you could ask for your stuff back. if that doesn't turn out well, hoo-boy, you got two choices. either to just let it go, or prepare yourself for a tussle.
• United States
16 Mar 07
your right, she probably would have tried to contact me except I didn't have a phone at the time. My bad for not keeping in touch with her. I am thinking about my next move, but want to wait because I am living with her now. I will probably say something just before I move out. I am even willing for her to pay me something and keep what she has (just a futon and a tv). I just want some kind of resolution, but like I said, waiting at this point.
@chaddik (113)
• Philippines
14 Mar 07
you shouldn't just let her "misdeeds" pass you by. by the way you talk about the situation, it looks like you and your "friend" are not that close with each other because had you been, she should have not done those things to you or you could have just opened up to her about how you felt about what she did with your properties. anyway, too late is never the case here so you can always tell her about how you wanted this issue to end. if she reacts badly or immaturely about this despite your being objective, then there might be no "friendship" to ruin afterall because in the first place, there never was.
• United States
16 Mar 07
yea, your right, I really thought she was my friend when I was her neighbor and just after I moved out. Now that I have moved in with her I have learned that I never really knew her or could trust her. I am really learning who my friends are and just who I can trust and how to listen to my gut feelings. I have really grown a lot in that past year.
• United States
14 Mar 07
Well, this is a tough one. Are you currently paying her to stay with her? If so, then I would definitely find a kind way to mention your things. However, if not, you may just want to call it even. Either way, I wish you luck because that can be really tough !
@classy56 (2882)
• United States
13 Mar 07
the best thing to do is not to say anything.its not worth loseing a friendship over.you can always buy a cheap tv somewere.but you cant buy friends.but if the subject evers come up than you might want to say something.but dont starts something you cant finish.an end up with no were to live.
• Philippines
13 Mar 07
Just tell her kindly that you need your items back. She will understand. You keep the receipts with you? Then all the more so that she cannot deny if she flares up if you ask for them back. Per my experience, the people unto whom we left our things with, will give them back to us if only we would ask them kindly. Then I follow this up with thank you's for being so kind to have allowed me to keep those things with them for some time. Try it and I hope you will find the courage to do so.