Should you teach your kids or let them just enjoy themselves?

March 25, 2007 2:51pm CST
I spend a lot of time at home guiding my kids play so that they are learning things and also actually sitting them down and doing formal lessons. With my 2 year old we do matching of letters and numbers, I try to get her to write her name and recognise colours. With my 5 year old I teach her writing, reading, maths and science for at least 30 mins a day and more at the weekend in addition to her going to school. Do you think I should be doing this, or should I let them just play and have fun all the time while they are still children?
13 people like this
56 responses
@KissThis (3003)
• United States
26 Mar 07
I think that its our jobs as parents to teach our children. I know that children go to school to learn but that doesn't mean that we can't help the situation.My kids teachers encourages the parents to help by teaching the kids out home. Not only does it help their education but it also shows the child that you care about what their learning.
26 Mar 07
That sounds really good. My daughters school doesn't seem to want to communicate with parents much. Its as if what goes on in school stays at school. I think I should know more about what she is learning so that I can help her, but the school don't seem to see it that way.
26 Mar 07
That is a great way of approaching it. I am trying to find ways of asking the teaching to give me more feedback to help me extend the learning at home and that is a great way to do it.
@KissThis (3003)
• United States
26 Mar 07
At first my daughters teacher was that. It was as if she was afraid I was ttrying to take her job away. Thats when I explained to her that if I knew what they were doing in class then I could be more help at home which will make her look even better as a teacher.I stop by her class room once a week .
1 person likes this
• United States
25 Mar 07
I would be surprised if your two-year-old could write her name yet, motorically speaking, but matching letters and numbers and recognizing colors sounds good; she can probably do some of that at least (though kids develop differently as to when they can do these things). I don't think 30 minutes a day is excessive. In the school district for which I work, we tell parents that their kids should read or be read to 20 minutes a day. I would keep the sessions short though; they are too little to sit through excessively long lessons. They do definitely need time to play; exercise is good for brain development too. And remember that learning can be fun; for example, you didn't say how you were teaching science to your five-year-old, but I'll bet she would enjoy some simple science experiments. She'd probably also enjoy helping you cook, which involves measuring, following directions, etc. Board games are also good for learning social skills such as taking turns (your two-year-old is probably too little for this, but your five-year-old is at a good age for some simple board games). Also, many board games have some reading and math. Monopoly Junior is a Monopoly game for younger children; you can buy things for smaller denominations than in the original and it's a shorter game.
25 Mar 07
I do play games with my 2 year old and she really enjoys it. My 2 year old likes to join in as well, so I usually play with her as she obviously doesn't really understand the games. When I teach science we usually talk about nature, the moon, plants etc. Just things that come up everyday. Both the girls enjoy doing cooking with me. My 2 year old doesn't do that much exercise as she get tired but the older one walks to school and does ballet.
1 person likes this
• United States
25 Mar 07
That's great. I just wanted to say also that I think it's great that you are so involved in your children's education. No matter how good the school is, kids with parental involvement in their education tend to do better than those who don't have that. Your 2-year-old may not do a lot of formal exercise, but I'll bet she runs around a lot. At least my niece and nephew did when they were that age.
1 person likes this
25 Mar 07
I think that it is hard for school teachers to give my daughter enough attnetion as there is one teacher to a class of 25 kids. Thats why I want to teach her at home as well. My two year old does run around a lot and she likes dancing with her sister.
@sri2694 (17)
• India
26 Mar 07
please let them play. As they r very young. This is the right time for them to play. Though we should teach our kids at home, they r having lots of time to study, to read . but when they go to school they don't have time to play. so please allow them to play now. Playing helps to create imagination and creativity thinking. so my best wishes to them.
1 person likes this
26 Mar 07
Actually at my daughters school she gets to play every afternoon and she has 2 times in the day where she is outside and allowed free play so she gets plenty of play at school.
@Debs_place (10520)
• United States
25 Mar 07
I tried to do additional learning activites with my son when he was little as well. I just tried to make it more fun or necessary when I asked him to do things..rather then a learning activity. For example - you are driving and you need change for the tool booth, teach the 5 yo how to identify coins and then to count the change. One time I took my son to see the hot air ballons, we came home and read about it in the encyclopedia, then we did math and learned science and how the baloon worked. The next weekend, we build our own hot air ballon. We went to see an air show with biplanes or we went into some caves and caverns and we read about them, I tried to make it as un school like as possible. For the 2 year old, have her make play-doh letters, my son would try to contort his body into shapes like letters, or draw pictures based on letters. For example, lower case b & d are tough for kids. But have them draw a head and foot board - using b for the headboard and d for the food board. b===d. Now wehn there is confusion with those letters, they can draw the picture and which letter is which will become clear. Make sure your little one knows her lower case. Cooking is great for learning as well, again my son knew fractions before he started school - he loved to cook. We doubled recipes and he learned and the quarters make a 1/2. He learned and had fun.
1 person likes this
@Debs_place (10520)
• United States
26 Mar 07
If you make it fun, you can easily surpassed the schools standards. My son was in kindegarten, he could multiply 5's and 10's, he knew how to divide, his vocabulary included words like nocturnal, negotiate, oxymoron, gestation period. He was incredibly knowledgeable about animals - knew all about the different species of whales, dolphins, elephants etc. He was severely dyslexic and could not read, I could not overcome that, no matter what we did.
26 Mar 07
What if the school isn't teching them to the standard you think they should getting? That is why I teach at home as well.
• India
26 Mar 07
I think you should just leave your child alone....you should only guide your child as and when required else you should leave it on its own.....let it be independent from this very age.....yeah parents always have the right to guide their chilidren....but only till an age....after that the parents should still give their suggestions but then let the child make its decision.
1 person likes this
26 Mar 07
I dont' think my 2 and 5 year olds would make the best decisions for themselves. Also in this word they have to learn that people will tell them what to do.
@ayesha25 (91)
• Philippines
26 Mar 07
as kids, they should really be taught and guided by their parents.. but parents should not be too tight towards their kids.. they should also give them a little amount of freedom in order for them to grow and experience the world..
1 person likes this
• Philippines
27 Mar 07
yeah, you've got a point.. but who gets to teach the children on their homeworks when they arrive from school? still, its the parents.. but i give credit to the teachers too because that's my mom's profession too..
• United States
25 Mar 07
Every child should be guided in their lives by their parents. There are limits to this though. Some parents go overboard trying to create the next prodigy out of a child that's destined to bag groceries. Learning for a child should be a fun activity. I think you can still teach your children everything your teaching them now without "sitting them down." I have a 2 year old myself and shapes, colors, numbers, etc. are all around us so there's really no need for formal lessons as the environment is all the formality you need. The more fun and exciting you make learning the more apt they will be to picking up the teachings. Learning and having fun are not mutually exclusive!
26 Mar 07
Learning and having fun are not mutually exclusive! That is such a great thing that you said. I am sure schools don't always realise this.
@cjthedog64 (1552)
• United States
26 Mar 07
DS is 15 months old. He's very smart - uses 70+ words, knows some colors, numbers and letters. Great physical skills, fine motor, etc. We don't really do anything formal though. We read tons, watch Sesame Street, sing the alphabet for fun, play with toys, talk about everything, etc. We mention the red ball, or the lion says roar, and he picks up on it. He's even learning to spell his name, because it's fun. I think the key is to make learning a part of daily life, and to make things fun. Kids love to learn, and love to have fun. Best to do them all together!
1 person likes this
26 Mar 07
That is great that he knows some colours at his age, my 27 month old daughter doesn't know any of her colours even though I keep practicing with her every day.
@maddysmommy (16230)
• United States
25 Mar 07
I think what your doing with your children is great, especially if they enjoy learning. My son has a short attention span and when I begin to play a game or do some type of activity he switches right off. I can't seem to get him motivated at all! The only things he likes me to do is read to him, paint and play with his toys. He is four and will be five in July. I hope he is not behind when he attends school in Sept.
26 Mar 07
I don't think he will be behind. a lot of kids can't write their name or count or anything like that when they start school.
@kurtbiewald (2625)
• United States
25 Mar 07
perhaps the best gift you can give kids is to show them that learning IS FUN. So teach them that and demonstrate that you enjoy learning and thinking too. Then try to not let school make learning dismal and boring. Even when they have to deal with deadly boring things at school, try to find whats fun or useful. LEARNING IS FUN. REALLY
1 person likes this
26 Mar 07
Yes that is certainly true. My eldest loves playing schools so to her learning is fun.
@onosan (6)
• Malaysia
26 Mar 07
a litlle bit of learning shouln't be a problem. but it must be well balance with playing as kids. i'm not yet married but i know that we were once kids. playing and enjoying are one of a stress releiving method. kids also have stress.
1 person likes this
@rica_12 (93)
• Philippines
26 Mar 07
i should teach my son as like as you doing to you children its good to teach them as early as their age..its good to teach early so that they have concepts in the time that they need to go school..but i teach myson for 1 hour everyday and he has a time to play...you should teach them so that they have a right manners..and we should let them play because they are still kids..thy need to play so that they enjoy their young age as of now..they have time to teach them and they have time to play..so thats good...and youre a good mom..keep it up!!
• Romania
25 Mar 07
i dont have kids but i love them,when i gonna have kids i will teach them how to respect the people,i will be almost all the time with them to educate them
1 person likes this
25 Mar 07
That sounds really good, you certainly do need to educate your children at home to have good morals.
@bongmix (267)
• Philippines
26 Mar 07
There is nothing wrong when children play, but i guess we should just make them know that there is a time for everything. they can play from the time he wakes up and give them time to play first and then probably after an hour or two, u can start teaching them already. its a matter of time actually they just need to know when to play and to study!!!
1 person likes this
@aniraaj (134)
• United States
26 Mar 07
you are doing great with you kids. well i am not yet a mom but i keep reading articles about parenting, and it says its very beneficial to have a good rapport with kids and parents should teach their kids the basic things. No matter how old you children are, know where they are, whom they are with. Give opportunities for him or her to earn you praise or a reward. kids like to get rewards and be appreciated. you can criticize their behaviour but never ever criticize the child. you should be engaged in your childs education. Research shows your involvement can enhance academic success and provide protection against the risks of adolescence. Dont retreat from you kids life. Participate in it. You can reinforce character and build discipline so you child can thrive in the face of life's many lessons.
@Mamaof2 (574)
• Canada
26 Mar 07
I think as long as you set aside a reasonable amount of time...30 minutes a day doesnt seem un-reasonable...that you are doing your children well. As long as it is not preasured and you make it anjoyable for them....I dont see a problem in it at all. It sounds as if you are only doing things that will benifit them in the long run and as long as it is not preasured or un fun for them...I say keep it up. The only thing that I would suggest is that maybe let the weekends be time for your children to enjoy the things that they really like. You know, playing with their toys, going outside ect... They have anough threw the week with school and lessons with you for their age. Even if maybe Sunday night for half an hour...sit down and go thro a few things with them. That way they dont feel like they are constanly doing school work..and when it comes time for them to have to do it..they will not resent it. Keep up the good work tho! Our children need parents who are involved and are interested in their well being when it comes to learning.
1 person likes this
@yanjiaren (9031)
26 Mar 07
I did a lot with my soin when he was young despite the very difficult circumstances I had to mother him in..which actually makes me feel quite sad bevause I have often felt deprived that I didn't have the most pleasant surroundinbgs to give himthe best mothering aI could have. a VERY DIFFICULT time of my life..quite sad really.
1 person likes this
@dfinster (3528)
• United States
26 Mar 07
I think you're doing a very positive thing. I have always liked to teach my daughter at home also. There are so many different ways you can turn learning into a fun experience at home. We would play matching games kind of like memory with her letter flashcards after we went through them. And math can be taught in a lot of different ways like if she's helping me cook or we go to the grocery store.
1 person likes this
@sunshine4 (8703)
• United States
26 Mar 07
I don't think that there is anything wrong with what you are doing, just make sure that it isn't in excess. Kids should have the time to just be kids too.
1 person likes this
• Canada
26 Mar 07
I think that helping them out to have the best possible chance in education is VERY important, it is important though to also make sure that they have a chance at self guided play so that they can use their imaginations for fantacy and role playing. (house etc.) I think that you are doing a wonderful job if you can find a balance between the two. I think that as parents we all just want to have the best possible lives for our children and could never be faulted for that. I think above all the fact that you are spending time with them and are an active part in their lives not only is the most important thing to them but it has an open road for communication for them as they grow older, because they will know that they can come to you with anything because you have always been there for them. Kudos and good job at being a wonderful mom!
1 person likes this