Do you follow other people's advice?
By steney
@steney (1418)
Philippines
April 7, 2007 9:21am CST
Whenever we have problems or having difficulties deciding, it's normal that we ask for other people's advice. Family and friends are all too willing to oblige. But do we really consider, value and heed their advices? I know we have the last say on what or who to follow, but do we seek advice just for the sake of being thought of someone who asks for it, or because we really need it?
I've had a lot of experience with friends seeking advice on a lot of things especially with their love life, and I noticed that some of them don't follow the right one and go on with what they had in mind even before they sought
somebody's opinion. Personally, if I'm decided on a particular thing, I don't ask for anybody's opinion anymore. Because I know nothing will change my mind.
I feel sometimes that people seek for advice not because they really need them, but to validate the decision that they already have. Some sort of a survey if how many feels the way he/she feels, and how many don't. They ask but don't really listen. Do you feel the same way?
1 person likes this
5 responses
@trinidadvelasco (11401)
• Philippines
9 Apr 07
I have encountered some people who do this. They come to you crying, asking for help and advice. Then you give her/him your best shot at the issue only to find out later on that not a word of what you said weighed a cent after all. Then there are some others who come and seek your advice, they seem to have come already with a resolve on how to deal with the problem yet, he still consults you and ask your honest opinion on the matter. Then you will find out that he had greatly considered your word when he took the decision.
In this life, you will learn that those who come to you crying do not really want your opinion, they had wanted you to console them and cry with them. The more sensible ones are the ones who talk it out reason for reason. Then they weigh things and consider what will be the best way to deal with the situation.
@raijin (10345)
• Philippines
8 Apr 07
I only try to look for advice just to make if the idea was thinking is also as the same as to what others have though of it, and I also try to make it a point that I don't tell them that I have or we both have the same thoughts. I only keep it first on my mind, then maybe gather all of their advices and sum it all up. And if ever I don't get the best result to whatever, I always keep in mind that it is still me who's the one responsible to whatever actions I take.
My friends are only there to give and share some of their advice, and I don't have to put the blame on them.
@mtdewgurl74 (18151)
• United States
25 May 07
I think you are correct we dish out tons of advice and recieve it and it is never really taken. It is just a thing that says hey so and so agrees with me so I will go ahead and do it no matter how many have given advice to to it another way. So yeah we do ask advice just to validaye what we have chosen ot do anyhow and occasionally you may actually get someone to follow advice. I ask for advice regularly sometimes I will folow the advice but more often then not I follow my own or someones whose decision is close to my own.
@mtdewgurl74 (18151)
• United States
28 May 07
If you really start to follow peoples advice all the time then you teach your self that you cannot really make decision for yourself without help in making them all the time I think it weakens your decision making some makes you more dependent on others if you If you make the decisions for yourself then ask just a few whom you trust to be straight up with you about stuff, Then you can really trust your own judgements and it wil only make you strong in the end and independent or some call it stubborn..lol
1 person likes this
@steney (1418)
• Philippines
28 May 07
Very true. People often think I'm stubborn and independent because I make and stand by my own decisions and seldom solicit advice from others. It's actually good that I have only myself to blame if my decisions go wrong, than point at somebody else who made the decision, and made it my own.
@KissThis (3003)
• United States
7 Apr 07
When I ask my friends for advice its because I am not sure as to what I should do about a situation.There are things in life that I haven't experienced. I don't want to make a bad choice so if I know someone who has the experience I will ask them how to handle the problem or ask what did you do. I do this all the time to my mom because I realize that she has alot of knowledge that is useful to me.
1 person likes this
@tjaytiu09 (139)
•
7 Apr 07
In my whole life.... I experince many problems like you! and everytlme i have a problem ,i always consult my friends!And when they are listening to your problem they give to you their advices, on what you need to do! But if your friend is there beside you, while you are saying your problem, but he/she is not listening!...it make your heart more lonely! because you think that he is not there for your problem....he/she is there just to let you know that he just want to be your friend! I always experience it! so i don't really trus to any person that aho wants to be my friend! so becareful!....
