Abortion - Father and rights

@Swtrose (3399)
Canada
May 4, 2007 1:39am CST
Abortion allows a woman to take power over a joint decision by aborting a life made by both man and woman, and the man has no say over it? Do you think the father has the right to keep the baby from being aborted? What if the father wants the baby, but the mother wants an abortion? Please note, I'm pro-life and against abortion, but I often wonder about this question.
9 people like this
33 responses
• United States
4 May 07
My view on abortion is that it should only be allowed when the life of a woman is being threatened. I am very pro-life. If you had asked me my views before my little girl was born I would have said it is a woman's place to decide. Having seen my girl still inside my wife, and having heard her heartbeat while she was still very very tiny, I am convinced she was her own little person while still unborn. I think you raise a very valid argument. The theory to most pro-abortion people is that it is the woman's body, so she gets to decide. Well, the unborn child should have a say in what happens, and who is a better advocate for that baby than the dad?
2 people like this
@Swtrose (3399)
• Canada
4 May 07
The mother is denying the right to life. Yes it is her body, but there is a life inside that body. That human being inside of a woman who can not speak for themselves has a right to be born. As you said who better to speak for that little human than the father.
1 person likes this
@Swtrose (3399)
• Canada
5 May 07
Because the child inside that woman's body is HIS unborn child.
1 person likes this
• United States
5 May 07
A father should get a vote in the matter becuase abortion is not a woman making a decision about her body. Abortion is a woman makin a decision about a life inside her. That life inside her should get a vote in the matter.
1 person likes this
@vanities (11376)
• Davao, Philippines
5 May 07
Theres no such things as rights in here since the child have every right to live, regardless of the opinion of their parents..im a prolife too..
2 people like this
@eden32 (3976)
• United States
4 May 07
I'm a mother of sons, so I can empathize with a man in this situation. I can see his side. But until a man is able to carry a pregnancy in his body, he just can't have the right to make that decision. Pregnancy is too much of a responsibility, for some too much of a burden (physically, emotionally, financially etc) to force any one to undergo. It should only be entered into with choice, love & acceptance. What I have told my sons since they were old enough to comprehend, is that they shouldn't be intimate with anyone until they know their partner feels how they do on many things, accidental pregnancy being pretty high on that list. Look at it from the other side too. If a man had the right to stop a woman from terminating, it's not a big leap to say he could also have the right to force her to have an abortion.
1 person likes this
@Swtrose (3399)
• Canada
4 May 07
Eden he could not force her to have an abortion should she want the baby, just as she could not abort if he wanted the baby.
1 person likes this
@eden32 (3976)
• United States
4 May 07
The law in the US does not require the man's consent or permission. What I am saying is that if the law were changed to require a male's consent (which is crazy- then you'd have to prove paternity too) then the law could just as easily allow that a male has the right to decide that she should terminate. The bottom line is it's a woman's body, no one- partner, parents, friends, politicians has the right to tell her what should happen to her body.
1 person likes this
• United States
4 May 07
Not wanting to be a parent and not wanting to be pregnant are two entirely different things. Many women who wouldn't mind carrying the fetus do so and hand it over to the father. However not wanting to carry the pregnancy in the first place is where the abortion comes in. Quite frankly, no male has a say in that. If she is not mentally or physcially able or willing to carry then pregnancy, then until it can be transferred to the male, he has no say in whether it stays or goes.
3 people like this
@YoungInLove (1254)
• Canada
5 May 07
Well, I do think the father should have a bit of a say in what happens. But if a women really does not want to have the child she should be able to make the final decision. Pregnancy is hard on your body and to force someone to go through something like that when she really doesnt want to is unfair.
1 person likes this
@Swtrose (3399)
• Canada
5 May 07
It's unfair to kill a life to spare yourself of an inconvenience brought on by your own actions.
@Swtrose (3399)
• Canada
5 May 07
Permanent Birth Control: Tubal Ligation or Vasectomy.
• Canada
6 May 07
Its unfair for a person to have to endure morning sickness, weight gain, and whatever comes along with pregnancy just becuase they are forced to. Especially if they are a rape victim.
1 person likes this
@misstree (241)
• United States
4 May 07
Okay. This might sound stupid but if the father wants the baby, then let him have it, and that way he can pay all costs. I mean, damn. If I got pregnant and I wanted an abortion, and the guy didn't want me to have it, then I would say, "Ok. I will give birth to this baby, but then you have full custody." I think it's pretty easy no? Sorry, I can be sarcastic sometimes when there's no easy way out. But seriously, that seems pretty easy to me? Greets! Great discussion.
@eden32 (3976)
• United States
4 May 07
I don't see how that's an easy solution. That still leaves the woman with almost a year of her life devoted to growing a child she doesn't wish to have. If there are complications she'll face missing school or work, medical expenses, not to mention however it effects her health in a general sense.
@Swtrose (3399)
• Canada
4 May 07
Eden, she should of thought of that before becoming pregnant. Again why take a life to spare oneself of an inconvenience brought on by your own actions. If your two year old suddenly becomes an inconvenience you don't murder it so why abort the unborn?
• United States
4 May 07
First of all, no one is in complete control of when conception occurs. It's not like anyone actually wills themselves get pregnant just to have an abortion. If women could will their own conception abilities, there would never be a need for abortion, nor would there be infertility problems. And secondly, pregnancy is quite a bit more than an "inconvenience" for most women. Even when you want the child, pregnancy can be extremely difficult and carries with it side effects that will never go away. Medical expences, complications and interferance with jobs or schools can be very damaging to one's life and health, both mental and physical.
• United States
7 May 07
I think the potential father should have some rights. I think he should be able to have a say so in wheather or not the baby lives. It is his baby as much as it is hers. I too am against abortion.
1 person likes this
@Swtrose (3399)
• Canada
7 May 07
I do agree!
• United States
8 May 07
Even if it violates the womans rights? Makes her a second class citizen. I'll repeat this: Declaration of Human rights: All are equal before the law. You can't simply take her rights away the way you can't take the rights away of anyone. Pregnant or no.
1 person likes this
@Swtrose (3399)
• Canada
8 May 07
What about the baby's rights? What about the father's rights?
@g3n3j0rd (721)
• Philippines
4 May 07
This is a difficult question. The mother has the right over her body and that's the reason why the final decision is up to her. I'm also against abortion and it could only be done if the mother's life is at risk. The mother should listen to the father but again the final decision is up to her since it's her body. But why should anyone would want to abort a helpless little baby in her womb is beyond me, unless of course, the mother's life is at risk.
@Swtrose (3399)
• Canada
5 May 07
Yes you don't, but quit attacking peoples opinions on this just because you don't want children.
1 person likes this
@Swtrose (3399)
• Canada
5 May 07
I do understand what it is like to be pregnant and I understand what it is like to grieve for the loss of a child, I also know what it is like to have a life taken from you. I do not judge those who have had an abortion nor do I judge those who have chosen not to have children. Since the father helps make the baby, I think he should have rights. I'm thinking about what is best for the unborn.
1 person likes this
@g3n3j0rd (721)
• Philippines
5 May 07
Sacrificialclam, when a man and a woman got married they become one. The woman's body belongs to the husband and vice versa. Whether you believe in that or not, it doesn't matter because that is the truth. The word of God says so and that is why. If only we will adhere to this, this will be a much better place to live.
1 person likes this
@naty1941 (2336)
• United States
4 May 07
That is a difficult question. As a senior citizen I have seen a lot and I believe the father has a right to make the decision to keep the child. However, what if the woman is unable to bear a child for medical reasons? What if the woman has an illness? Is it better to have the child live (example. AIDS) with the illness? or is it better to have an abortion?
1 person likes this
@Swtrose (3399)
• Canada
5 May 07
A hospital is not going to fill a surgeon position because they have to take off for medical leave, seesh. I'm laughing hysterically at your arguments.
@Swtrose (3399)
• Canada
5 May 07
I know of several couples who are waiting to adopt. You talk like adoption is this simple process.
@eden32 (3976)
• United States
5 May 07
If your willing to adopt a special needs child, an older child or a non-white child; it is a very simple process and a very quick process. Couples who have been waiting for more than a few months, are waiting because they are only willing to adopt a white, healthy, infant.
@4cuteboys (4102)
• United States
4 May 07
I really think the father should have the right to keep the child. I don't see why a life should be lost if there is one of the parents that wants to keep and raise it. It may be the mothers body but thats a little child inside! I really feel its sad if a life is lost and there was a parent ready to take on the responsibility to raise it. That's just so sad to me.
1 person likes this
@4cuteboys (4102)
• United States
5 May 07
So? The woman took part in it and it happened. Running away from responsibility isn't dealing with an unplanned pregnancy. Why give up on life if there is a parent there wanting the child/fetus/embryo ect..
1 person likes this
@4cuteboys (4102)
• United States
5 May 07
Why is the kid in utero not good enough?
1 person likes this
@Swtrose (3399)
• Canada
5 May 07
There is no replacing a child. I know! A child isn't a cat. My God, your replies are heartless!
@judyt00 (3504)
• Canada
4 May 07
I think the rights of the father were decided in court the day a rapist took his victim to court to try to stop her from having an abortion. The judge decided then that as long as the fetus is in the woman's body, nobody else should be allowed to make that decision for her. Most of the men who try to stop an abortion don't want the baby, they just want to punish thewoman for breaking up with them. lets face it, most women in a happy relationship won't have an abortion. its the ones who are being abused, and want out of the situation, or cheated on that do.
1 person likes this
@Swtrose (3399)
• Canada
4 May 07
How do you know that the father does not want the baby and women have an abortion to spare themselves of an inconvenience brought on by their own actions. Not all women who abort on abused and cheated on. You just stereotyped all the men in relationships where the woman has aborted. Statistics Canada reports 245,825 – number of one-parent families headed by men as of 2001 Census. I imagine that number is higher now. Just over half of those fathers have children under 18. Nearly 10% of them have all children under the age of six. You can't say that all men don't want the woman to have an abortion so they can hurt the woman. The fetus is human and if not aborted will grow to be a fully functioning child. So you are saying that it is ok for the woman to murder the baby because it is in her body, but the father should have no rights in parenting the child? Then should the father pay child support should she decide not to have an abortion and keep the baby?
2 people like this
@Swtrose (3399)
• Canada
5 May 07
Tubal ligation.
@Swtrose (3399)
• Canada
5 May 07
No? So you are just going to use abortion as a form of birth control?
• United States
4 May 07
Did you know that if you shine a red light through through the mother's stomach into her uterus, the baby will become startled and turn away, and if you shine a yellow light it will turn towards it? And that they usually jab scissors into its head to abort?
1 person likes this
@Swtrose (3399)
• Canada
5 May 07
The vacuum is used in the first 6 to 12 weeks (first trimester) of pregnancy. Have you ever seen a picture of an 8 week old aborted fetus? By 7 weeks they already have toes, fingers, ears eyes and nose.
@Swtrose (3399)
• Canada
5 May 07
I have actually researched it and I'm not talking about the photo of the baby lying next to the quarter. I'm talking about the actual development of the baby and real photos of an aborted fetus. Hands and feet can be seen at 8 weeks.
@Swtrose (3399)
• Canada
7 May 07
How is he today?
@dlkuku (1936)
• United States
4 May 07
Before I met my husband, he was in a two year relationship with a woman, who ended up pregnant. He told her he would gladly take care of her and the baby, and she went off without telling him and got an abortion. I think a father should have a say, he was heartbroken over this. After that, the relationship ended.
1 person likes this
@Swtrose (3399)
• Canada
4 May 07
That is so sad.
1 person likes this
• United States
8 May 07
Well, that's his fault for not mking sure the woman he was in a relationship with shared his opinion in children and child-bearing. I wouldn't have carried it, either. It's not always a simple matter of who is going to take care of it after it's born. It's a matter of whether or not you want to waste 40 weeks of your life by gestating a fetus.
1 person likes this
@Swtrose (3399)
• Canada
8 May 07
GloomCookie get over yourself. Geez do you not show empathy to anyone? dlkuku husband was grieving the loss of his unborn child.
@susan50 (110)
• United States
6 May 07
I believe that if a man shows interest in being a father, then the woman shouldn't have the right to abort the life. Just because the woman is the one carrying the child doesn't give her all the rights. I am not sure how I feel about abortions, I know I could never abort my baby, no matter what the circumstances. I know of a couple of women that have had two-three abortions in their life and when it came time for them to want a child, they had so many miscarriages before being able to carry one full term, all because they had abortions. I believe men have rights to an unborn fetus just as the woman, even though the woman is the one carrying it. There are a lot of women out there that think getting pregnant gives them power over men and allows them to use the pregnancy as leverage towards a man for whatever they want.
@eden32 (3976)
• United States
8 May 07
Assuming the women you know had safe, legal abortions; there is no reason at all for them to not be able to have children in the future because of the abortion. Miscarriages are very common for all women. Statistics say about 25% of pregnancies end in miscarriage and they allow the number could in fact be higher since often early in a pregnancy a woman may not know she's pregnant. Termination is a safe procedure, it has less medical risks than carrying a child to term.
@Swtrose (3399)
• Canada
10 May 07
Termination is a safe procedure, says who? There are risks associated with abortion. Abortion could also increase the chance of a subsequent miscarriage.
@liyan97 (2128)
• Northern Mariana Islands
6 May 07
Well that is a hard question to answer, I mean every situation is different. So I decided to respond by using my experience.....I was seeing a guy for about 5months and got pregnant, when I informed him of my pregnancy, the first thing he said was "abortion is not a choice!" Of course I already knew that. I asked him how things would be and he promised to be here, seeing as this was his first child. anyways about two months after the baby was born he left me! I feel that a womans point of veiw should be taken into consideration, especially if she is already a single parent. I am not saying that I agree with abortion, but the fact is each situation is different, but the one thing that often stays the same is, it is the woman who ultimately ends up becoming a single parent. With that said, how much do you really mans opinion really worth?
1 person likes this
@Swtrose (3399)
• Canada
6 May 07
That's why in the US in 2000, 1/5 of single parents were single fathers accounting for more than 2 million. 201,000 single fathers raised three or more of their own children under 18. 196,000 single fathers were raising their own infants under age 1. Canada- 245,825 — The number of single dads in Canada, about 19% of the total 1.3 million one-parent families. Fathers are capable too. A Father's love is just as important as a mother's. My hats off to single dads. With that said, men should have a right!
@hollowheart (1572)
• India
5 May 07
Dear Swtrose, I am really against abortion. I really hope no one is thinking on these lines. I call it a top list crime which once committed would make u suffer the most in life and forever even after several rebirths. I really dont understand how people can be so cruel, specially the mother.. Well only for the sake of the topic raised by u i would say that both parents have equal rights to prevent a child from being aborted.
@eden32 (3976)
• United States
5 May 07
those may be your beliefs, you have the right to feel however you wish. But for those who don't agree, you have no right force those beliefs on us.
• Philippines
5 May 07
Of course, the father of the child has the right to keep the baby from being aborted. Both him and his spouse is very much responsible for the life of their baby because they were the ones who created them. I, myself too, is pro-life. I really despise people, particularly women, who undergo abortion. They don't know how grave their act is. They don't know how priceless their baby's life is because it's God's greatest gift.
1 person likes this
@Swtrose (3399)
• Canada
6 May 07
Not everyone believes the unborn life is worthless.
@tombiz (2039)
• Philippines
4 May 07
Abortion is one of the pillars of humanity's injustice unto himself. Thinking humans as we are, we had have been devising ways not to build lives and value life but to destroy it. I can't imagine a mother wanting to abort the life in her womb. Though I am sure that there could be limited exemption medically, I am never in favor of this very horrific way of ending a life. I just imagine if I am the one to be aborted. What would the fetus to his/her mother? Then there is the right of the father which in abortion is never given the value he deserved also. The father must also be given the right to decide of his baby in the womb. Sadly, this is never considered by our genius lawmakers who thought they are much better than the two individuals responsible for the fertilization and conception of that another valuable life.
@Swtrose (3399)
• Canada
5 May 07
Tom, thank you for your reply. Life is precious- choose it.
@Poison_Girl (4163)
• United States
7 May 07
Hey, if the man can and would be willing to carry a baby for 9 months, to only push it out a teeny hole later on, then he can go ahead and keep the baby. Until then, the woman can have an abortion without him having any say and I'm all for that.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
6 May 07
A very good friend of mine got pregnant when we were in second year college. She was just 16 years old back then. When we learned about it, we actually tried to stop her from aborting the baby. We really begged her not to. We even told her that if she needs funding we'll get jobs just so she could raise the child. She loves the baby's father but she finds him poor and irresponsible. Even the father tried to bargain with her. He talked to her parents as well. But in the long run, she really didn't want the baby. She said she was not ready for it and that she was too young. That broke our hearts. In the end she decided not to be friends with us anymore and she also stopped communicating with her ex.I really cant bear the thought of babies being aborted. Though we did our best, everything was still up to her.
1 person likes this
@Marie2473 (8521)
• Sweden
5 May 07
This is a difficult question. I would like to say that I would involve the dad in the decision but if we can not compromise and I reallyu do not want to have a baby i am not sure that i would be able to carry it and give birth to it, just for his sake. I have had an abortion once and since i didnt get pregnant by choise and the father wasnt in the picture i didnt have to consider this. In this case i would not have listened to him anyways since this baby was concived through rape. Abortion should be a free choise - however it is not an easy decision to make and it is something that u have to live with for the rest of your life so noone should take it lightly,.
1 person likes this