I found this crass

United States
June 5, 2007 3:27am CST
I recieved an invitation to a bridal shower yesterday (funny thing was I had to call to find out who it was for as I didn't recognize the name) for my very good friends fiance. I was shocked to get an invitation as there is no love lost between us (actually there is no like lost either). What I found crass was that they specifically put on the invitation to give cash or visa gift cards or american express gift cards! I usually don't even use a registry as more than a way to get ideas but to be told "give money" blew me away. She's not even registered anywhere. Why throw a shower so she can open a bunch of cards? What about you? Do you think it is crass or rude or impolite to put such a thing on an invitation? Also do you think they should maybe put the groom's name on the invitation too so people who don't know the bride know who the party is for?
2 people like this
2 responses
@rhinoboy (2129)
5 Jun 07
I think it's very distasteful to ask for anything, especially cash. I had quite the opposite problem, my wife and I refused to register anywhere or to publish a 'want list' and several family members were severely p!ssed that they didn't have anything to buy us. The way we saw it, we've been living 'in sin' for years and have all the household appliances etc we need and we're better off financially than most of our family, so we'd rather they kept their money. We were given some nice wedding items, photo albums, picture frames etc and some gift vouchers which were greatly appreciated. I didn't want people to see us get married for the sake of receiving a gift though.
1 person likes this
• United States
5 Jun 07
LOL living in sin. Been there, done that, have the tee shirt! We got married in secret. Boy did we get flack for not even throwing a party so we could get gifts. Funny isn't it? I mean I know that they are living in a house already. As I said to my hubby "fine you have what you need so register for things you want but don't necessarily need but don't ask for cash".
1 person likes this
@rhinoboy (2129)
3 Sep 07
Thanks for the BR! Did you end up giving them cash or vouchers, or getting them a gift anyway?! I could understand if they were saving to get a new car or move house or something, then of course they would ask for cash rather than un-necessary items, but if that's the case, they should certainly have put something on the invite. It surprises me that the gifts come forst in the states. As usual, the trends are starting to pass over here to the UK, but generally, wedding gifts are given at the reception. As with baby showers, most of the gifts are brought when people come to visit the new family at home.
1 person likes this
• United States
3 Sep 07
You are welcome. I ended up not going to the shower. (turns out none of the groom's friends went) So they just got a check on the wedding day. Gifting here is getting crazy. You give bridal shower gifts and wedding gifts. You give baby shower gifts and the you tend to bring a gift when you visit the baby. It is nuts!!
• United States
5 Jun 07
I think that is very rude. I agree, why have a shower? It's not like she's going to open any "gifts". And, yes, both names should be on the invite.
• United States
5 Jun 07
Thanks for your comments. Glad I'm not the only one.