Words that break a mothers heart.
June 6, 2007 12:32am CST
My six year old and four year old were playing with a ball on a string. The 4 yr old had the ball the 6 yr old the string. He let goof the string and it hit my 4 yr old in the eye hard enough to leave a welt. I was angry for other reasons but this pushed it over the edge. I told the 6 yr old go sit in his bed until we could talk. Because he immediately denied having any part and blamed my other son although I am in the same room and witnessed. So my six year old yells I hate you to my 4 year old. It broke my heart. He hurt his brother and instead of apologizing or chacking to see what he could do, we got that response. A little bit later I went into talk to him and tried to explain how it was wrong, how words hurt, what we could do better next time. I asked him if everytime he had brokensomething of mine or damaged or trashed something or when I was angry at him or his brother if I ever used those words. HE had nerve to say YES. I almost cried. I have never inmy life said those words to anyone. I have said I hate this in frustrating situations butnever to anyone outright or in their presence. My heart shattered. How does a 6 year old or even a 4 year old know succh mean words? He apologized to us both later but I feel the point was lost on him. Sometimes sorry doesn't fix it, and it is too little to late. HOw do I get him to understand? What do I do different?Anyone ever been in this situation?
• United States
6 Jun 07
I'm sorry that you have to go through this. It's not easy to take it, but you already explain to your kids. JUST LET IT GO.... I know it hurts everytime you think about it, but don't let it keep coming back and hurt you again and again. In fact, that's what I went through for years. Now, I realzied I was hold on that painful/hot button myself for years and won't let go. My older daughter one time said similar thing to a friend of mind; in fact, she said it right in front of my friend and her grandma. She told grandma that she wants grandma to be her mom. The reason why my friend told me about it, since my friend knew my family well and want me to be careful of it. Everytime I think about it, my heart hurts. I can't believe my daughter said such kind of thing. It's all due to grandma always say "YES" to whatever she requests, and I sometimes say no to her on whatever she ask for. Later, soon after I knew this, I also explain to her, but she still can not understand. Love and time will take care of this. My daughter now knows why sometimes I have to say no to her; it's all for her own good not mind or others.