what would you do?

=) - how would you react?
Philippines
June 14, 2007 6:26am CST
suppose you found your friend lying about so many things about himself/herself and/or everyone else, what would you do?i have this friend who i really enjoyed being with because he's really funny and nice to be with. we were introduced by common friends. at first, i (and our other friends) enjoy listening to his stories about himself, his friends and his family. he would always join us for our night outs or house parties. earlier this year, we have noticed that there was something different about his actions and we also have observed that there were so many inconsistencies in the things he's been telling us. a couple of months ago, he invited us to his hometown and that's where we realized that most, if not all, of the things he told us about himself weren't true. he even told us he'd be leaving for abroad very soon but then again, there were inconsistencies in what he told us. sure, he told us he'd be leaving for abroad. he told me that he'd be flying to australia, then he told our other friends, he'd be going to hong kong, then our other friends were told that he'd be going to canada, then he told my boyfriend that he'd be going to macau. since we started asking him questions about where he'll really go, he started avoiding us.. if you were in the same situation as i am (or as we are), what would you do?
3 people like this
12 responses
@g3n3j0rd (721)
• Philippines
15 Jun 07
If he starts borrowing money or things or asks you to invest on something, I would advise you not to give in and avoid him. If he's good in lying, I don't think he could be trusted in these things.
2 people like this
• Philippines
15 Jun 07
well, i don't think he would borrow money for now because he has always given us the impression that he has all the money in the world, if you know what i mean... i don't think he would hurt his own ego by borrowing money from anyone in the group. lol thanks for the advice
1 person likes this
@g3n3j0rd (721)
• Philippines
15 Jun 07
If that is the case, I would be tolerant whatever he tells about himself. Since he doesn't ask for anything, I would continue to enjoy his company. However, it seems like he's the one trying to avoid you based on your responses to other comments. Maybe, he was hurt. I hope your friendship would go back to where it was but just be cautious.
1 person likes this
@ryanphil01 (4185)
• Philippines
15 Jun 07
since you have been friends for quite sometime, you've got a right to ask him the true answers to your questions. if he is continuously avoiding you let him do that for a while until he finds time to talk to you again. i guess, from his lying about where he'll go, he's just begging for attention. there's no guarantee that he'll stop lying, and I think he's just making an "honest" change because he got caught lying. it's just for attention. on the other hand, he may have some problems that he just couldn't air them out. invite him once more for a serious talk. he may be needing a support system from his friends, your group particularly.
• Philippines
15 Jun 07
i have tried several times to talk to him about whatever is bothering him. whenever i do, he would ask "what makes you say that i have a problem?" or "me? bothered? no way!". maybe, somebody else could talk to him about what's going on. we tried, we really did... yes, i agree that he was just seeking for attention and he was successful at that.. lol
1 person likes this
• Philippines
15 Jun 07
well, let him do what he wants. time comes he will realize his own faults and shortcomings. don't bother yourself asking him again or perhaps going with him anymore. i think he will just come to your help when the need arises.
1 person likes this
@cdparazo (5768)
• Philippines
14 Jun 07
My first instinct would to try to help him out by talking to him why he is acting that way. There could be deeper reasons that you don't know about and as friends, it may be a support system he needs.
2 people like this
• Philippines
14 Jun 07
we really would like to help him. we tried... i tried... but he just keeps avoiding us..
@sensesfail (2251)
• India
15 Jun 07
I would not consider a friend at all cuz a friend is a person who does not lie and I'd avoid him as far as possible cuz he could more than just a liar. People who lie just like changing clothes could be definitely dangerous than those who lie when they are desperate.
1 person likes this
• United States
15 Jun 07
I never thought of the lairs that way. I can see it so easy to understand. I hope the guy is not that way.
@maddysmommy (16233)
• United States
14 Jun 07
Thats a tough one dolce as it sounds like he is a compulsive liar (if thats the term to use - it may be too harsh). Maybe he has some underlying issues?!? Since he is avoiding you, i would probably just leave it at that, I mean you can still be friends but I doubt that you will ever believe anything that came out of his mouth anymore.
• Philippines
15 Jun 07
yeah, i think we could still be friends but things will never be the same... thanks
• Philippines
14 Jun 07
I will not do anything, I'll just observe him. However, my impression of him will become different. My impression will be based on what he says and what he really does. I won't say anything about what I discovered about him, because it is he who is trying to destroy himself, not me.
1 person likes this
@williamjisir (22901)
• China
14 Jun 07
If I were in the same situation, I would still consider him as my good friend, but I wouldn't completely believe him. I would only think of him as a friend who loves joking and talking big for fun. I would not be so serious about his words. We have friends of different kinds in life with different characters.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
14 Jun 07
i would avoid him before he/she can make me believe to his/her world of lies. it is difficult to avoid him/her at first but i need to end it before i can say things directly to him/her.
1 person likes this
• United States
15 Jun 07
I would first try to mind my own business. If I were still liking his friendship. I would mind my concerns and let him be. If he was comfortable with me enough. I would think he would tell me what he was hiding. he just met you guys and told some large lies. who's to say he is not living any where at all. Maybe he has less than you guys and is shame. I don't believe in minding others concerns. Asking so many questions of my business. I would avoid you like the flu. I am sure this man is not a burglar. Or your stuff would be gone already. Place yourself in his shoes would you want all the questions? If you have to go through all that to get him to talk leave him alone. I would rather a person felt me out and was comfortable with confiding in me.
• Philippines
15 Jun 07
i don't see anything wrong with what i asked him.. i just wanted to know what could be bothering him. i don't consider it meddling with somebody else's affairs to ask a friend (out of sincere concern) as to how he is and if he was okay..
1 person likes this
• United States
15 Jun 07
I am clearly not being rude here. If the person is not wanting to discuss his business. It would be your friendship he may be needing. Trying to be there when he needs you will help. If he has emotional issues your trust he may be trying to gain. good luck either way..
• India
15 Jun 07
well i think if u want to continue ur friendship with him then dont ignore him but instead make him feel everytime he tell lie dat u know dat he is telling lie..hope this wud help...it had worked wid me...
• Philippines
15 Jun 07
if i were you, i wont talk to her/him anymore, really liar just trying to have you as a friend because of benefits. he is not into true friendship. you should tell your friends to evade him/her.
• United States
14 Jun 07
If he lies about everythign you are never going to be able to take him serious. He can be your friend, But I would not take any advise from someone that you know to be lieing. That doesn't make him any less fun. But it does make him a little less trusting. Dont you think?