June 14, 2007 7:01am CST
Good morning All, This is pretty sad. But, you can put your hankie away, 'cause it has a happy ending. I have a friend who is in his early seventies. He and his wife were married for 35years. Then poof, out of the blue, they announced that they were getting a divorce. They were an integral part of each other's lives for three and a half decades. Suddenly, at the age of 71 he found himself alone. I'll also add that there was no abuse. Neither is alcoholic, or an addict. Neither is an abuser. Both are very reasonable, respectful people. Even though he is in excellent health, very spry indeed. He works out three times per week, is very active in the community, heck ... he even still rides his horse several times per week, and does equine Search & Rescue. Even so, I was very worried about how he would adjust to living alone. This got me wondering ... Do we have a reasonable expectation that our life partner will grow old with us? After committing half a lifetime to a marriage, aren't both partners deserving of some kind of peace of mind that their spouse will be there through thick & thin? I find his situation unfathomable. It's not like they didn't really know each other. They had many separate activities, yet seemed to meld their individual hobbies & friends quite well. The ex-wife is 10 years his junior. She moved away to New York City, and last I heard was very happy with her new life. He stayed here, and just a few months after the divorce, decided to call a widow friend, who he's known for many years. He and the widow have become very close, and seem happy together over this last year. The widow friend is much closer to his own age, and seems to really value their relationship. Yet, I'm left a little bewildered ... imagine having to re-enter the dating scene after nearly four decades. What are your thoughts about this?