What did you do to push WAY...WAY beyond your comfort zone?
@Perspectives (7131)
Canada
June 20, 2007 10:35pm CST
This picture hangs on my office wall and is a constant reminder of what it took to break through my comfort zone and try something radically different. The opportunity presented itself while attending a Big Brother/Big Sister day camp. All the young whipper snappers were scrambling up the wall like loveable little monkeys. I stood at the bottom and a part of me wanted to try it...but then my 'older' brain started a cycle of mind chatter that went something like this..."Are you CRAZY...you are far too old to be attempting to climb that VERY HIGH wall with only tiny little things sticking out of the wood to place your feet on."I heaved a deep sigh and tried to listen...but another voice started to argue with the first one. "Oh quiet...don't be a party-pooper...I might not have another chance to try this for awhile." Voice number 1 piped in again..."You have got to be kidding...you have stiff knees, weak arms...you could fall, injure yourself...maybe even die...don't do it!"
As I struggled with what to do my hubby who had been watching me and probably picking up on my mental mind chatter sauntered over and placed a reasuring arm around my shoulder and quietly said, "I can see you want to do this Sweetie... why don't you try? I believe you have the power in you if you just allow yourself." I look up into his eyes and his confidence in my abilities silenced both voices and I decided to go for it.
After being hooked up to a safety harness I began my ascent. My hubby stood at the bottom and talked me through it as I ever-so-gingerly put one foot in front of the other and made my way upward. The farther I got the more gruelling it felt. My shoulders ached from pulling myself up and my knees were cranky...but I just kept going. The key for me was not to look down and before long I had managed to make it all the way to the top. Afterwards I repelled over a river to the other side and during the ride I felt a rush of victory like nothing I had experienced before. The immense satisfaction of being able to do something none of the other 'Bigs' at the gathering were willing to attempt...(especially those in my age catagory) was only one part of the glory. It was also great to know that my body was in pretty good shape. However, it was even more thrilling to recognize I had achieved a big breakthrough in moving beyond safe inner/outer paramaters.
This event was a big lightbulb moment for me...and a milestone event in life. The memory of what if felt like to allow myself to do something I wasn't sure I could gave me the confidence to try other things...just so I can see myself in new ways. I want to keep on keeping on with this idea...not recklessly throwing all caution to the wind...but just enough to keep me from getting too stuck in familiar patterns. Does anyone else have examples of how they pushed beyond their comfort zones and what happened when you did? Come all you EVERY-DAY HEROS...I know you are out there!
6 people like this
6 responses
@liranlgo (5752)
• Israel
3 Jul 07
It was great reading what you wrote and that you did what you wanted to do.
With me i did alote of things that are way way from my comfort zone. Lol.
I know that after 14 of independent life and a good job, i decided i want to change my life and try some new things.
So i just picked myself and moved away to my parents house for a year, studying somthing somthing i always wanted, and starting a job that i never thought i would do.
I had to get away from my comfort zone, because i did feel like my life was stuck and there are many more things that i wanted to do.
So now, i live far away from all my friends, in a small city, studying somthing new, working in somthing new and for the first time after many years living with my parents and really starting to know them.
So that is what i did and believe me it is way way from my comfort zone, but i am happy that i did that.
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
4 Jul 07
Wonderful to have you share the ways you have moved beyond comfort zones in the past. Also that you keep on pushing the envelope so you can grow and change. I respect that because it isn't easy to do initially.
I think it would have been a very enriching experience to know my parents they way you have had an opportunity to do. It sounds like you see them from a different angle other than just 'your parents'...more like the people they are in their other roles. That is sometimes a difficult thing to achieve and one many would like to do.
As you have said, sometimes moving, way, way beyond comfort zones leads to places we would never have been and that makes life exciting and worthwhile.Good for you!Thanks for adding to the discussion.
2 people like this
@jcj_111776 (3216)
• Philippines
13 Oct 07
I remember the time when I made a decision that changed my life. It was a time when I was an employee at an ice cream shop. It was a comfortable life, no hassle from my boss and the working conditions were great. I thought at that time what more could I ask for?
But I felt that there was a big void inside of me. You see, Raia, I was only able to graduate from high school and my father made me work at once. He didn't believe in going to college.
And that was my biggest frustration. But as a good daughter, I followed what he wanted for me. And I have worked for almost 2 years at that ice cream shop.
But one day, while serving a group of college girls, I felt so empty. I knew that there was still something missing in my life. I wanted to know how it feels like to be in college.
So, that day I made a life-changing decision that made me gather all the courage that I have and step outside that comfort zone I have lived in for almost 2 years.
I told my father about my decision about going to college. Not knowing if he'll be angry at me. And I resigned from a nice paying job. I wasn't sure if I'll be able to survive the college life but I was determined to experience it and go through with it.
And after 4 years of college, I received my diploma and made my family so proud of me. You see, I was the only one who got to finish college and my 3 other siblings didn't make it.
It's scary to step outside of our comfort zones, not knowing if we'll only end up in a big puddle of disappointment or....rejoice in our success because of our determination.
But that's the joy of living. Taking a calculated risk.
2 people like this
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
15 Oct 07
Oh my goodness...what a delight to hear about this! Every time we chat there is more respect added for who you are and how you present yourself. Wow my friend...you really stepped waaaay...out of your comfort zone in my opinion. Not only did you have to take a big leap of faith into a new world...you had to stand up to your father and family members who saw things otherwise.
You are to be highly commended jcj...and I sure applaud what you did. There is an expression that courage is when we face the fear and act anyway. I would say that what you described here is a grand example of it!!
Now you are a great example for others...and it is great to know how proud your family is of you now!
VERY IMPRESSIVE...and thanks for sharing this with me!
Raia
2 people like this
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
23 Oct 07
Hi Yes...I really like you new Avatar...and sorry I missed this addition to the response. Things have been busy here and I've been working on healing my knee. I am seeing a knee doctor on Wednesday looking for more answers. It seems to be be getting better and David is helping with massages and hot water bottles. But I want to know what is going on. Consequently, I haven't been on Mylot as much lately. I also have work commitments and have to finish up an article for my column. I intend to finish up final edits on my book by the beginning of the year..so I am busier now.
I will always be a part of Mylot because I value my connection with you and others here. It is why I am glad to have other addresses to stay in touch. Yes, I did received the lovely card you sent and I loved it! I only picked it up in the last day or two and haven't been doing much of anything on line...but thanks so much for thinking of me again.
When I read the commitment and perseverance it took to achieve the education you have it is truly something to be proud of. I admire you and respect your focused intent and staying with it until you made your dream a reality.
Your son will benefit from hearing about your efforts and hopefully emulate them.
By the way...how is his tendency for screaming going. Was it a phase...or is he still doing it? Must be challenging!
Anyhow...that is it for now...thanks again for your thoughtfulness, care and friendship...
Raia
2 people like this
@jcj_111776 (3216)
• Philippines
15 Oct 07
Thank you, Raia. Oh, by the way, did you receive the PM I sent you a couple of days ago?
I think I earned my father's respect when I did that decision. He didn't say anything when I told him of my decision but he let me do it, without any harsh words coming from him.
During those 4 years of researching and doing school projects, there were even times that he commended me for the things that I was doing. And that was when I knew, I did the right thing.
And when my graduation day came, my big brother was so proud of me, he said he felt as if he wanted to go to the stage and tell the whole world that I'm his sister!lol!
Coming from a third-world country, obtaining education here is not easy. There's nothing free for us. We have to pay for everything. From the pencil that we'll use and to the school projects that are required from the students.
I even tried supporting myself, even if I didn't have to, because my mom made sure she helped me with my school finances. I applied for a job at a pizza restaurant. I worked night shifts, come home at 2 in the morning and can only catch a few hours of sleep, then get ready for my 7am class the next morning.
It was tough but I was fully determined to push through. I wanted to have a college education and at that time, nothing can stop me from graduating.
Oh, and do you like my new avatar? I changed it last night. I thought my profile needed something new.^_^
1 person likes this
@aaidjs (1149)
• Croatia (Hrvatska)
18 Nov 07
Hello Dear Friend,first of all I have to say that you start very interesting discussions and supriced me that you had only 8 posts for this topic!Everyday life is full of new challenges!Some are small some are big!For you the big challenge ,in that time ,was climbing on that stone and when you did it,you become stronger in your eyes!Today I was skiing with my grand kids and that was big challenge for me!I was born near sea coast and I am not so familiar with snow and particularly I am not good on ski board!But I did it,my grandkids was so happy and I am full of confidence on myself!That bravuras on snow I didn't do when I was young girl but I do it now!Bravo for me!I don't even like to think about unthinkable things that I was doing for my children and refugees during the war!I was stronger and braver that I ever imagine I can be!!The Humans are very spectaculars and when what to do something we do it even in the most dangerous situations!Someone said that "only the sky is our limit"!Deep in my self I believe that I can do all if want it!Have a nice Day and Regards Silvana
1 person likes this
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
18 Nov 07
Hello Silvana..
Thanks for you comment about starting interesting discussions. The topics are things I enjoy and I value all the comments that are received. There are so many thoughtful people within this forum that it is a pleasure to participate in their discussions and respond to their ideas here.
I am happy that you continue to contribute here and once again you have added a great perspective to this discussion. Each time I read something you write about I am struck with your innate positivity and love of life! The fact that you are willing to move beyond your comfort zones and can celebrate the facc that you are braver and stronger than you knew...I am with you when you say BRAVO FOR YOU!!!
Your views are akin to mine when you say that deep within you you know you can do all if you want it! YES! Something David and I believe in is...Anything the mind can conceive and believe...it can achieve.
Good for you Silvana...and may the great life you have created for you and yours continue all the rest of your days.
Warm and caring regards,
Raia
@artemis432 (7474)
• Abernathy, Texas
15 Oct 07
BTW I think what you did did take great courage.
2 people like this
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
18 Nov 07
Thanks I guess it did...but once I made it to the top and slide down the repel it was amazingly exhilarating! What you did took a lot of moxie too...and you seem to have your fair share of that too!
Raia
@remo999 (49)
• Canada
4 Nov 07
I see this is an older discussion but the photo did it for me. I could not climb like that because of the height and some discomfort with that. The odd thing is that the very thing I did to push way beyond my comfort zone was to sky dive, especially because of the lack of ease around high buildings. However, when you are skydiving there is not the same association with height because of the expansive view.
So you scaled a 60 feel wall and I jump out of planes...in either case we both moved beyond comfort zones to do it!
1 person likes this
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
6 Nov 07
It is interesting how depth perception works. Skydiving has some appeal to me..but I haven't 'taken the plunge' (lol) and acted upon it. Anyway thanks for your input. Hope to see you around more.
Cheers,
Raia
@cordacs99 (15)
• Canada
18 Nov 07
I read the last comment before mine and in some ways it is surprising that this topic does not have greater participation but in other ways not so much. In my dealings with people many are afraid to move beyond their comfort zones and stay there, often for a lifetime. So maybe there are not that many who have done it and therefore cannot comment on it. The thing I did that was way beyond mine was to risk getting into a relationship again after being hurt and betrayed by my first wife. I told myself that I would never marry again and then I met someone. After a year of dating I decided I was willing to move beyond my fear of being hurt again and asked her to marry me. In two and a half years it will be twenty years and we are as much in love as we were when we met. So my comfort zones were well worth moving beyond and I am glad I did. From what I read in other responses here it sounds as if those who can do it reap some solid rewards.
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
19 Nov 07
Yes, one never knows how a discussion will be received. Anyway, thanks for your input...it is a different, but valuable perspective. Yes, our emotional comfort zones are often as hard...or harder to move beyond.
Glad your relationship has worked out...hope it continues for a lifetime.
Best regards to you and yours,
Raia
