What do i do when my brother expects me to include his stepkids in everything???

United States
July 16, 2007 11:09pm CST
My brother doesn't like me to get my nephew who is 5 without including his 2 stepkids. They are not close to me and i am close to my nephew. I would like to spend time together with my nephew more often but i get the same thing all the time. My brother says i dont include them! I buy for them for Christmas,Easter and their birthdays. I have a 7 year old son who is in a wheelchair temoporarily and my nephew plays well with him. The other two dont play with him much at all! My nephew will play what my son wants to and gets toys for him and plays really good. I just dont know what to do as i have tried to explain that to my brother but he just gets mad and says to bad. He is pushing me away from my nephew and i dont want that!!! Any advice would be great!
4 responses
@tdl617 (34)
• United States
18 Jul 07
i know its hard to talk to family. your brother doesnt seem to want to listen to you. did you ever think it was maybe his wife pushing the other children onto you. she may feel that her kids are now part of the family and should be treated the exact same way. you need to let het know that even if they are family there should be some boundaries. i mean, does she include your nephew in all of her family activities without hesitation? the way i see it, you should skip the middle man and go straight to the problem. the mother.
• United States
18 Jul 07
I have seen the damage to stepchildren not included. It lowers their self esteem, not to mention what it does to the natural parent of these children. Are you aware that you're probably hurting your sister-in-law by this? And that your brother is probably trying to please his wife with this? These children will feel your distance, and your preference. Totally not right to disclude them.
@Nardz13 (5059)
• New Zealand
17 Jul 07
Hi there. Well maybe you have to go the extra and include the step children, for the sake of keeping your nephew around and any closeness with your brother... Its up to you this is only an idea, I hope it all works out well for everyone involved... Goodluck to you...
@butterfly39 (3907)
• Philippines
17 Jul 07
Well to avoid problems maybe you can include the two stepkids so he won't get jealous at all. If you wish to give something for your nephew you can buy something for two too even little things will make them happy so they could play with your son too...