Birth Order of Children

@ossie16d (11827)
Australia
October 27, 2006 9:45am CST
THE BIRTH ORDER OF CHILDREN Your Clothes: 1st baby: You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as your OB/GYN confirms your pregnancy. 2nd baby: You wear your regular clothes for as long as possible. 3rd baby: Your maternity clothes ARE your regular clothes . Preparing for the Birth: 1st baby: You practice your breathing religiously. 2nd baby: You don't bother because you remember that last time, breathing didn't do a thing. 3rd baby: You ask for an epidermal in your eighth month. The Layette: 1st baby: You pre-wash newborn clothes, colour-coordinate them, and fold them neatly in the baby's little bureau. 2nd baby: You check to make sure that the clothes are clean and discard only the ones with the darkest stains. 3rd baby: Boys can wear pink, can't they? Worries: 1st baby: At the first sign of distress-a whim per, a frown-you pick up the baby. 2nd baby: You pick the baby up when her wails threaten to wake your firstborn. 3rd baby: You teach your three-year-old how to rewind the mechanical swing. Pacifier/Dummy: 1st baby: If the pacifier/duummy falls on the floor, you put it away until you can go home and wash and boil it. 2nd baby: When the pacifier falls on the floor, you squirt it off with some juice from the baby's bottle. 3rd baby: You wipe it off on your shirt and pop it back in. Diapering/Nappies: 1st baby: You change your baby diapers/nappies every hour, whether they need it or not. 2nd baby: You change their diaper.nappy every two to three hours, if needed. 3rd baby: You try to change their diaper/nappy before others start to complain about the smell or you see it sagging to their knees. Activities: 1st baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics, Baby Swing, and Baby Story Hour. 2nd baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics. 3rd baby: You take your infant to the supermarket and the dry cleaner. Going Out: 1st baby: The first time you leave your baby with a sitter, you call home five times. 2nd baby: Just before you walk out the door, you remember to leave a number where you can be reached. 3rd baby: You leave instructions for the sitter to call only if she sees blood. At Home: 1st baby: You spend a good bit of every day just gazing at the baby. 2nd baby: You spend a bit of everyday watching to be sure your older child isn't squeezing, poking, or hitting the baby. 3rd baby: You spend a little bit of every day hiding from the children. Swallowing Coins: 1st child: When first child swallows a coin, you rush the child to the hospital and demand x-rays. 2nd child: When second child swallows a coin, you carefully watch for the coin to pass. 3rd child: When third child swallows a coin you deduct it from his allowance! Pass this on to everyone you know who has children . . . or everyone who KNOWS someone who has had children . . . (The older the mother, the funnier this is!) GRANDCHILDREN : God's reward for allowing your children to live
2 people like this
7 responses
@rosebug23 (1909)
• Australia
22 Dec 06
ossie,this is soooooo true i only had 2 myself but my sisters had 3,4,6 and as i spent so much time with my sister while our children growing i can vouche that this is exactly how it is . I was having a good laugh while reading and it brought back so many good memories. Thank you this was really great . Grandchildren really are a reward for all you go through with your own children .They are gods gifts to us. My two eldest grandchildren arrive tommorrow for christmas and i am so excited
@ossie16d (11827)
• Australia
22 Dec 06
Oh I am so glad that you can verify that this is what happens rosebug and I have no doubts that it did bring back some wonderful memories for you. It is just great to read that you will have your 2 eldest grandchildren staying with you for a while, and to have them with you for Christmas will be a fantastic bonus. I am sure that it will "put the icing on the cake" for you, so to speak. :)
@caramello (4381)
• Australia
21 Dec 06
This is great ossie, (once again) stopping at 2 for me seems like it was a good idea! lol But my one and two rolls were reversed a little as my second was very prem. and seem to do more of the first on her!
2 people like this
@ossie16d (11827)
• Australia
22 Dec 06
I imagine with a prem baby that you would take lots of care, irrespective of which order they arrive into the family. At least I was super cautious with ours as he too was prem but in my case he was our one and only so cannot really compare. Pleased that you enjoyed this one caramello. :)
• United States
22 Dec 06
I love it, it's adorable and funny...and I only have about 10 to 15 years before I can (hopefully) start looking forward to my 'awards'..... If you're under 40 and have an 'award' is it still an award?
@ossie16d (11827)
• Australia
23 Dec 06
I am pleased that you enjoyed it and yes, I think the rewards of a grandparent applies irrespective of the age. I am still waiting but at the rate our son is going I will be too old to know who and what they are when/if any grandchildren finally arrive. LOL
@carmat (2850)
• Canada
16 Nov 06
Cute, having four children I can really relate. i should sit down somenight and contine it on with the fourth baby.Oh how that was fun. Thanks for sharing!
@ossie16d (11827)
• Australia
18 Nov 06
I am glad that you can relate to it carmat. Actually I was talking to a friend the other day and a couple of months ago she had her fourth baby. I asked her how it was going, and she said 'well it is good. The older ones can go outside because soon enough they will come in for something to eat'. She is much more relaxed and so I sent her this and she replied 'too true'. Thanks for your contribution to the discussion. :)
@tamm820 (464)
• United States
27 Oct 06
This was just to funny! Thanks for sharing!
1 person likes this
@ossie16d (11827)
• Australia
27 Oct 06
Yes I liked it too when it was sent to me, so I kept it on the computer. LOL Thanks for responding to the discussion. :)
@nhtpscd (1418)
• Australia
22 Dec 06
Yep how true it is but what about those who have more? we must get really slack then
@ossie16d (11827)
• Australia
22 Dec 06
We have a young friend who has recently had their 4th child, and she is so blase about it. I remember when she had the first one, and as each successive baby has come along she has become more relaxed - or slack, depending on how you look at it. I think the key to it must be that first one it is all new and then it is all downhill from that point. LOL
• Portugal
21 Dec 06
One of the best I have read today. I only have one kid, so that´s a one to print and then check point by point.
@ossie16d (11827)
• Australia
22 Dec 06
Friends of mine say that this is actually what does happen, and they have several children each. LOL