How old is too old to be having kids?

United States
October 31, 2007 2:27pm CST
My personal # is 35. I heard that the risk for mom and baby go up after 35. But I know that a lot of women are putting it off further and further. Is that safe?
5 people like this
9 responses
• United States
31 Oct 07
I don't really have an age on this one. I think it depends on a lot of other factors. If your going to your child's school and look like his grand parent? Your too old to have babies. If you know your winding down and getting all stiff boned. Your too old for babies. Children love to play in the park. If your not even able to run around with this poor child..Don't have them. I see a lot of people who wait over 40+ to have kids. These kids don't have the better part of their parents. They are too tired to play even a board game.
1 person likes this
• United States
31 Oct 07
I think that it kind of depends on the person. I have known of some 25 year olds that act and say they feel 50ish, if that is the case they do not need to be having kids. I basically agree with everything that gifsandbagscom said.
• Australia
2 Nov 07
Um, gifty, no offence, but are you talking men and women, or just women. My partner is in his 50's and i'm 27! lol. We got kids and he has an older son. does he count? lol. I hope not, 'cos he wants more! I think you are right though, but only where the women are concerned. And yeah, i'm always asked if my partner is my dad! funny really and we love it! lol.
• Philippines
5 Nov 07
My mom gave birth to me when she thought she couldn't anymore. She was 45 and she got menopause a few months after I was born. However, there were no complications. And, growing up, I remember always running around with her in the park and she brought me to school every single time until I was old enough to go on my own. She was old by number, but she didn't seem like it. At the same time, there are moms who are in their mid 20's that have health complications and they can hardly play tag with their young kids. I have to agree with you giftsandbagscom to some extent: it does depend on a lot of factors, but most importantly, it depends on the personal health and lifestyle of the mother. If you're a parent that can still share a lot with your kids at the age of 40+, then go ahead, by all means.
@Gemmygirl1 (2870)
• Australia
10 Nov 07
Last i heard, the risk for having kids at a later age actually starts at 30 - once you hit 30, the chances of birth defects increases dramatically & there is more strain on the mother's body, that's why they say the best age to have them is in your 20's! I'm not sure though, i have friends who are 37 & 38, they would make fantastic parents to a newborn if they decided to have more kids, although i don't think they will! I think it depends on the person though, for me, i wouldn't want to be in my 30's to have a family, i have 1 daughter & would like my other kids (however many that might be) to come before i hit 30 - i don't want to be too old to enjoy my children & still have the energy to keep up with them all! I'm not sure if it's safe to put it off but it is a personal choice & if an older woman wants to have a late family then the decision is up to her, she will be informed of the risks anyway so then she just has to make the final call!
• Australia
2 Nov 07
It is true that the risks are increased significantly after 35, but medical science has come a long in the last couple of decades, so I'm sure that these women are in good hands. however, I am of the firm belief that if you do leave it too late, there could be more stress and heartbreak in store, not to mention years of regret. I was 22 when I had my first, and that was almost 5 years ago, and I would have to say it was a good age. My body was ready for it and I had already planted myself firmly on the earth: learnt more of who I was and where i wanted to go next. these days, women can have someone surrogate for them, though i think that if they do this because they left it too late, they don't deserve to have a child at all. Selfishness is not something a child should grow up with. I'd put myself out there as a surrogate, but only for those who have a genuine medical condition, and not just being past the opmtimal age to conceive.
@pkosher (71)
• United States
2 Nov 07
I don't know.. I would like to be finished having kids by about 30 or 31. I had my first at 26. But my neighbor is 40 and just had her first baby a few weeks ago. Both mom and baby are healthy and doing great! She just got married a year or two ago so she wasn't really putting off having kids after a long marriage but she and her husband would like more kids, I think - although they've talked about adoption too.
@mmiller26 (1932)
• Canada
2 Nov 07
While I feel that when one wants to have a child is a personal choice, one needs to put some thought into exactly how that child's life is going to play out. There are a lot of women who are waiting til their forties to have babies, and to me that seems a little odd. If a woman is 42 when she has her baby, by the time that child graduates high school when he's 18, she'll be 60. Assuming that child waits until his 30's to have his own child, there's a good chance she'll never meet that grandchild. I can't imagine raising a child and as soon as that child is grown, I'll be a senior citizen and there's a good chance that child will be taking care of me. I can understand wanting to have a life of your own before having kids, but I think if you decide to take that route, then just don't have kids. So for me, 40 is the maximum age to start having a family. But that's just my opinion.
• Philippines
1 Nov 07
In regards with age, for me, for men there is no risk of having a child at any age as long as can support the family. While women, at the age of 34 and above is kinda risky both for the mother and the child.
@cindytao (38)
• China
1 Nov 07
But there is one point we cannot deny,the risk for great aged preganant moms is higher than those young ones.So I think if you have the plan having kids.35 or a little older is a suitable age.
@kareng (7980)
• United States
1 Nov 07
My mom had my little brother at age 40. I was 15. I learned then that I never wanted to have a kid or a young kid when menopause approaches. For me I wouldn't consider it after age 35-36. Just too much for me! I want to enjoy a few years of retirement without kids...just grandkids!!
@gradyslady (4055)
• United States
31 Oct 07
The age they're saying medically is 39, each year they come up with new medical reasons to say a year lower, but for the past two or three years now they've said 39.