being a new mom is hard

United States
January 26, 2008 4:05pm CST
i have a two week old son and currently staying with my family in a small little apartment and the baby's daddy only visits once a week. its hard for me to find time for anything because i breastfeed and he needs fed, changed, always wants held. how do you other mom's manage? i love my son to pieces but sometimes feel overwhelmed especially when i can't find the time to shower or put on make-up or even clean up a little.
2 people like this
6 responses
@schilds (410)
• United States
27 Jan 08
I does get better, just like the other posters have said. I have a 3 year old daughter and my son is almost 2. I nursed my daughter until I had to stop because I was 4 months pregnant with my son and couldn't gain any weight, it was just too much for my body. So, I got a 5 month break in the nursing. My advice - dont rush the feedings, encourage him to eat as long as you can. You will get a bigger break in between. My daughter loved the sling. She was close to me, but my hands were free, and I could do dishes, or put on makeup... With my son I used a mai tai. I liked it better - but it is a little better for older babies. You can find instructions to make both of them online. And if you need to shower, and he won't nap for you - take a bath with him. I used to put my son in his bath seat in the tub with me. 2 birds with one stone kind of thing. I got my bath, he got his bath, and usually took a good nap when we got out. And one thing I have finally figured out - as hard as it is - sometimes the baby just has to be mad at mom, because we all have to eat, and mom has to pee once in a while too. If he doesn't have any urgent needs - food, diaper - and he is safe, jump in the shower quick and give him a good cuddle when you smell better.
@schilds (410)
• United States
27 Jan 08
And dont feel bad about being overwhelmed - it happens to most of us. You have this little stranger that just took over your whole life, but you will get to know him, and the two of you will get a routine down soon. Then it will be easier.
@Samanthavv (1387)
• United States
9 Feb 08
I was thinking the same exact thing you were, except I was thinking it five months ago. There really is no answer. Mother's should have been born with four arms, and no need for sleep because, as much as I'd like to say it gets better, it doesn't. Not for a long time. Enjoy your son while he's so small. When my daughter was 2-8 weeks all she would do is sleep... Fuss when she was hungry or wet, and go back to sleep. She was kind of boring, but I do miss it. Now, I have to struggle just to try and get her to go to sleep for half an hour so I can sleep! I sleep on my stomach, hold her bottle with one hand and go to sleep. Although it's not a deep sleep (I always peek on her) it's still better than none!) And I don't think I've been able to take a bath alone in almost 5 months. Get used to it. Especially since the dad isn't really in the picture.
• India
27 Jan 08
i agree with you but you can don"t distrub your family at this time ok.
@psyche49f (2512)
• Philippines
27 Jan 08
I perfectly understand the feeling...been there, done that. In fact, being a parent entails sacrificing yourself for the sake of your child. It also means sacrifing your comforts and other things to used to enjoy doing freely. But with your two-week old baby, your world now revolves around him. Even sleep and taking a bath becomes a luxury now. We moms just have to accept that. Looking back, I can say that it's never easy to be a mom, especially if you just want nothing except the best for your baby. So suddenly you become overwhelmed because it is a full-time job! But when your son grows up, you will soon reap the fruits of your sacrifices. Don't fret...that's just part of being a parent, especially if your man could not help you out at the moment. Here's wishing you the best.
@di1159 (1580)
• United States
27 Jan 08
Congratulations on your new arrival. Hang in there! It will get better! You and both going through an adjustment period and its a little rough at first. Soon he will start sleeping longer which will give you a bit more time to rest or do whatever you need to. I know its hard, but don't worry you will be a pro in no time.
@vera5d (4007)
• United States
26 Jan 08
i think the key is to either hire a babysitter or give up on the notion of "time for myself"... eventually you get really good at doing things with the baby in one arm...i can wash the dishes while i'm holding my daughter...i think they make slings though you could try...i put my daughter in her bouncy chair in the bathroom while i shower most days... as the baby gets a little older they sleep through the night more and you can occupy them with some toys or baby einstein...