February 13, 2008 5:54am CST
Hv been with partner 4 11yrs, we have been thru lots of rollercoaster rides and always manage to 'weather the storm' however for some time now (about 8mths) i have felt that we have come to the end of the road. I am no longer in love with him, his habits annoy me and i do not feel attracted to him in the slightest. However, he worships the ground i walk on and would happily move us and our children on to a dessert island if he could. He is a good father, he works hard but he has no motivation to do anything and i take sole responsibility for everything. The house is mine and i have asked him to leave on several occasions. He says he will get a flat but it never materialises as he has no get up and go! I hate seeing him hurt, he doesn't speak to me at times and i just cannot see the point in carrying on when neither of us is getting any pleasure from our relationship. The fact that he will not leave is really starting to get to me and i have thought of just up and leaving myself on many occasions. I dont want to uproot the children and told him he can as much access to them as possible but not me. I have just taken on a new job and i am planning to work full time so that i dont hv 2 spend time with him. This will be very hard as i also go to college, work as a volunteer, run the house (dont cook) and our eldest child is just 9. What can i do?
18 Feb 08
Children are important but if you are miserable,they will sense it and it won't do them any good to be in that situation anyway.I think he hasn't gotten himself a flat because he is in denial and thinks if he stays,that's it..relationship goes on.Maybe find him a stack of flats to apply for and it may sink in that you are serious.I don't think it's fair that you should have to move from your own home and disturb the kids.Your partner needs to have his eyes opened that it's over.