Is it so bad if I really don't want to have bridesmaids on my wedding?

Cyprus
March 19, 2008 9:16am CST
I don't understand people sometimes. Concerning my wedding, everybody has an opinion! I really don't want to have little bridesmaids on my wedding day, not just because I find it unnecessary, but also because the kids in our families have different ages and it won't look ok. Ages start from 0-13! and we have about 8 kids! I hate the idea that some of them will run all around the church, and the reception and "mess the wedding up". I don't want to have any bad wedding day memories. What do you think?
1 person likes this
5 responses
@sedel1027 (17854)
• United States
19 Mar 08
Don't let anyone deter you from having the wedding you want. If you don't want to have bridesmaids, then don't have them. It is your wedding. As far as kids, it is up to you if you want to invite them. We did not have bridesmaids at our wedding. We only allow kids (anyone under 16) directly related to us to be at the wedding as well. There were no hard feelings and we had the wedding we wanted.
1 person likes this
• United States
11 Jun 08
Your wedding is simply that-your wedding the only way there will be bad memories is if you let things other people say get to you. Do what your heart tells you and your lucky future husband to do.
• Philippines
25 Mar 08
This is your wedding, you should have the upper hand on the decision making. I am pretty sure you have told them about this, so take a stand. This is supposed to be about you and your groom, so make about you two, not them.
• United States
25 Mar 08
Don't have "junior bridesmaids" if you don't want them. Because if you ask one, you will have to ask their sister, and then you will have to ask someone from the other family to even it up. I think that as far as inviting kids to the actual wedding, but not to actually be IN the wedding there are several considerations. Is this a morning or evening wedding? Consider that if you are inviting relatives from out of town and do NOT invite their children, they might not come to your wedding because they would not have anyone to mind the kids for several days. Also, a mom who has a newborn might not come as she may not feel comfortable with leaving them with someone, and have the choice of coming for a little while with baby or not at all. That would be kind of greedy of you to anticipate a "mess" that may not happen and lose out on a favorite relative being there for your day. Drunk adults tend to mess things up more. You will be so busy that if kids are playing around in the back of the hall, you won't even know it. I know when I was in second grade, looking back, I would have been crushed if I had been not invited to my aunt and uncle's wedding at that time. You may find it surprising that parents often do watch their kids at weddings, and understand if it is apropriate for an individual child to handle coming or not. If you don't want the young kids at the wedding, I would most definitely invite the 13 year old, and maybe if some are older, 8-13 but then have a friend or hire someone to hang out in a room and be available to watch the younger children. Parents may want to keep an infant with them, but will welcome having an alternate activity for the 2 year old and the 4 year old. It also depends on who these kids are. If they are your nieces and nephews, or the younger brothers and sisters of you and the groom, then you must invite them. If they are the children of your grown second cousins, not so much. I think that you have to make your own choice here, and I think not having kids as bridesmaids is a fine idea. But remember as far as just merely inviting people, people want to share your special day.
• United States
19 Mar 08
Girl, this is your day, you can do whatever you want!!! Weddings have been coined as being set around the brides wishes, so if you don't want bridesmaids in your wedding, don't have them!!! Don't worry about everyone else's opinions, theirs don't matter because they aren't the ones getting married. You shouldn't have to make even the smallest of compromises for anyone. You have the best wedding your wallet will allow done your way. If people get mad, they don't have to show up! It's your day girl, do you!!!