are you willing to adopt a child.....

United States
April 2, 2008 8:03am CST
if it happens that you and your partner cant bear a child?
3 people like this
15 responses
• United States
2 Apr 08
Me and my wife cant have any kids and have adopted 3 kids through the foster care system. We have had them for 5 years and it has been the best thing for both my wife and I. Now we have had problems with them but for the most part it has been great. Of course they call us Mom and Dad and we dont tell people that we adopted them we tell them that they are ours. If they ask then we will tell them but if they dont we dont. We did the right thing by adopting.
• United States
2 Apr 08
so, do you have contacts with the real parents if you dont mind marriedman111399? Im thinking about adopting if ever after trying and trying still we cant bear our own!
1 person likes this
2 Apr 08
Thankfully I am blessed with 2 beautifull children, but i would stil consider adopting a child in need or maybe even fostering when i am older. I would have considered adoption instead of having my own children as a last resort I think i would have liked to pursue all other avenues first then if it wasnt possible i would be happy knowing i tried and then go for adoption.
2 people like this
• United States
2 Apr 08
wow! thanks graceandowen! I was just thinking if I cant bear a child then maybe go on adopting..so tyring to solicit ideas from members whats their stand on this issue.Thanks again!
1 person likes this
• United States
2 Apr 08
That is one of my goals even if we can have children, i want to adopt kids when i get older, mostly older kids that dont get looked at, maybe even troubled kids that need someone to help them. I want to be one of those people that help unwanted kids. I want to show them that there are people that care, and that the world isnt a non caring place. And once i start adopting im going to keep adopting kids until i cant anymore, I just hope that when the time comes that i will have enough money to do it. I dont know if im barren yet but even if i aint i still would adopt.
1 person likes this
• United States
2 Apr 08
if only everyone who has that enough money thinks and feels the same as you are libertarianfreedom21, we cant see kids suffering! it will be a very wonderful world!
1 person likes this
• United States
2 Apr 08
yes it would be a very wonderful world, now when is this world going to happen LOL. maybe in 2012 where the end of this time comes and the begining of a new time begins. LOL or maybe it was supposed to be in 2000 during the Y2K or something
• United States
2 Apr 08
I do know if its possible still..Im hopeless about a wonderful world..We can make it in our own family but still wondering if its possible to have a wonderful world free from corruption, poverty war and etc...I wish!!!
1 person likes this
@gemini_rose (16194)
2 Apr 08
If I had the room in my house, then I would adopt! I did some fostering a few years ago and I was taking a course to become a full time fosterer, but then I became pregnant and so I did not go through with it. Now I have 4 children, but I have spoken to my hubby before about maybe looking into either fostering or adoption should we feel like it when our children are older. If I could not have had children of my own, then I would have tried to adopt for sure, I would have probably adopted about 4 as well!
• United States
2 Apr 08
wow...means you have that great income gemini_rose.I wish I have that enough money also because if ever I can bear a child, its always wonderful to have kids around. to experience how it is to be a mom and to have a big family..Lol
@gemini_rose (16194)
2 Apr 08
Hun when I first started having children money never even came into the equation, if you wait until you have enough money you will never have them. With my firstborn the father was a waste of space and did not want to know his son, so I was a single parent and I just worked all the hours I could to give my child the best. I met my now hubby when my firstborn was 7, and when we had my second child we also had nothing, we struggled for years. It was only 5 years ago that my hubby was lucky enough to get a job in a very high paying factory, and it is only in the last year that we have cleared all the debts off and now see a little more money, but still not a vast amount. But we manage and you do when you have children. It is beautiful to have this family and I am lucky in that I can be at home for them and look after them and my hubby goes out to work, you will have it too one day I am sure of it.
• United States
2 Apr 08
Thanks for that inspiring sharing gemini_rose..i do love having kids too but this time, Im still adjusting everything here is USA since i grew up in the Phils.and everything seems strange and new.. I want to start working first for some experience at least I will have a chance to mingle with any people to improve myself and at the same time to understand fully their accent! lol, but its true..You will be one of my inspirations as I will start having my own family..thanks for always there!!!
@chechuva (1276)
• Philippines
10 Apr 08
Yes i will adopt a child. actually even now that im still single, im considering to adopt one. as i can see to my parents, they are longing for someone to be their company. since i and my siblings are already getting old, my parents are going to adopt my cousin. honestly a house without a child is a very lonely and boring house..
• United States
10 Apr 08
I agree...thats great for your parents at least they will not be having a hard time adjusting without you and your sibling!
@mimpi1911 (25454)
• India
10 Apr 08
Hi dear, this is a pertinent post for me. I am single and had always hoped for adopting a child. But it's not that easy. Firstly we have to have a likeable surrounding, the right kinda environment and money. Without these, it would not be wise to adopt. I should not bring a child into my life when I cannot afford to. I should ensue proper childhood and then I would definitely help myself by adopting a child. Thanks.
1 person likes this
• United States
10 Apr 08
I agree, it will not also be healthy adopting if we are financially not capable. It will lead to unhappy environment for us and for the child! Thanks for dropping!
@TinaP40 (329)
• Spain
10 Apr 08
I think people who adopt are fantastic and deserve a lot more than they receive, is it for me proberly not but who knows if I couldnt have had my kids then I might feel differently.
1 person likes this
• United States
10 Apr 08
thanks for sharing TinaP40
@aseretdd (13736)
• Philippines
4 Apr 08
I already have a baby... and can have more... but i still dream of adopting a child or two... i was able to do social work in some of the orphanges here... and seeing those children makes me want to take them home and give then the love and care they deserve... but until we can sort out our financial problems... adopting and having more babies would have to wait...
• United States
4 Apr 08
exactly right, we also need to consider money matters in doing this!
• India
3 Apr 08
I was very willing once. I have my son and when he was around 3 or 4, I wanted another child. Now I was not ready to go thru pregnancy and its allied responsibilities for a second time. My job meant a lot to our family and I just could not apply for leave again. But I wanted a child so I told my husband about adoption. Well he said a plain & simple NO, no ambiguities in that. I was sad to say the least but his reasoning was there too. For one, we could not give our biological child the same amount of financial support if there was another child and this is the main reason why my job means so much. So biological or adopted, there was no way I could have two children and if we both knew it all along, there was no necessity to bring another child into this household and make things a little more difficult for all of us.
1 person likes this
• United States
3 Apr 08
Thats also a valid reason..it will be unfair to your biological child form some reason. like instead of having or getting what really can you afford for him, it will be compromise if you will have another kid..
@minnie_98214 (10573)
• United States
2 Apr 08
Heck Ive got two boys plus one on the way and my hubbys little girl and id still adopt if I had the money or means.
1 person likes this
• United States
2 Apr 08
wow...great heart minnie_98214! But, I also love to have many kids..I want fun and challenge everyday...I know its tough to be a mom and wife..hat's off to all the mom here in MyLot...
1 person likes this
• United States
2 May 08
If this was the only way that we could have children I would out even thinking about it adopt a child. Look at how many children are out there who need good homes. If I couldn't have a child with my partner than I would definitely open my heart and home to a adoptive child and once I made that commitment the child would be truly mine.
• United States
2 May 08
Hello sunshine lady, thats for sharing and it's very overwhelming to know that we have a lot of people who has a good heart like you!
• United States
2 May 08
My husband and I are planning to adopt, whether we can have children or not. We want to have 2 biological (if it is possible, we haven't tried yet) and 2 adopted. We are not old enough to adopt yet (You have to be 25 in most cases) so we have just a couple of years to wait, but as we wait we are able to plan and save the required funds needed to adopt. Adoption is not as expensive as most people seem to think, my aunt and uncle just adopted a little baby boy and overall it cost them $10,000 but they get that $10,000 as a tax write-off over the next 5 years. So for someone who gets taxed $20,000 a year (like he does), it's actually benefited them financially. (Though that should NEVER be a reason for adoption). We decided to adopt because I felt bad for bringing more children in the world when there are so many children out there who need good loving homes, but at the same time I wanted my own biological children. So we decided for every 1 child we had, we would adopt 1 child. I know many adoptive children who grew up in great loving families and how much it's been appreciated. I just look forward to showing someone else that there is sill love in the world.
• United States
2 May 08
Great heart CherBear, I hope every one who has the capability to adopt will be having the same thinking as you, so to contine giving hope and love to these kids who were unfortunate enough! Thanks for the wonderful response!
• United States
10 Apr 08
I just turned 30 today, and I got a card from my parents, telling me that they couldn't believe that it has been 30 years since the day they walked away from the adoption agency with me. It was very touching and for my whole life I have felt very special and loved by them. I know this is sort of a different perspective than you asked for but maybe it can help. I know not all adopted children have such a great experience, but it all depends on the parents. If you have the capacity to love and treat that child like it was born from you, then go for it.
• United States
10 Apr 08
I agree...Its not also fair for the kids if they are just adopted for some other reasons besides of treating them like the real child and providing them the love and care they need! Thanks for sharing!
@nengs10 (3188)
• Philippines
10 Apr 08
I am willing to adopt a child if worst things really happen. I will consider it a very worthy alternative though. If ever I do that, I will really make it sure that I will be a very good and supportive father to the child.
• United States
10 Apr 08
for me too if I will not be able to bear any child thats the best option!
@nice030481 (1108)
• Philippines
3 Apr 08
yes i am much willing to adopt a child if we cant bear. but thanks God we have now a son, and the other one is still here in my womb.. Good Day...
• United States
3 Apr 08
wow...you're blessed to have it..I know not everyone can bear a child you know...well..thanks for dropping and inspiring my day!!!