I seek out friends with a higher number of posts

United States
April 21, 2008 4:46am CST
I know its not fair to the newcomers as I was once a newcomer myself, but I find that I tend to seek out friends here on this site that are more established. Not to say that if I get friends requests from people with a small amount of posts to their credit I won't add them, but I'm weary of them due to the recent attacks on myself and friends. I feel that those that have been around a longer period of time are less likely to attack another member and abide by the rules in a more sensible manner. If you are an established member of the site, do you still add friends, or only add friends if requested? Or do you still seek out friends and do you do so by the quality of discussions they post or by how well established they are?
10 people like this
37 responses
• Indonesia
21 Apr 08
well I think it's explainable that people usually seek for those who have higher number of posts. because mostly those with higher numbers are stable active members. however, I don't reject the friend requests from those with smaller number of posts. sometimes new users are even more active than the ones with more number of posts, sometimes I would add friends, sometimes I would add if requested. I don't abide by the quality of their posts, but if they started spamming me, I would delete them from my list too.
3 people like this
@subha12 (18454)
• India
21 Apr 08
you have very well ecohed my thoughts. i think some have done the same bad things to me as well. i am down from 97 to 69 in reputtaion in 3 days. how that can be possible without some rating me -? i think we are the victims here.
3 people like this
• United States
21 Apr 08
I thought I hadn't gone down a point, but I have. I'm down from 98/100 to 74/100. But thats fine as long as I keep my good friends.
1 person likes this
@Aussies2007 (5339)
• Australia
21 Apr 08
I don't seek friends and never did. Every single one on my friend's list did seek me as their friend. I have never refused a friend request either. But if their questions annoys me... I turn their notification "off". I am not here to make money or friends... My standards are very high. I would love a real friend on myLot... but I have not found one yet.
3 people like this
• United States
21 Apr 08
Yes, I guess I did request your friendship and not the other way around. I think I respected your no nonsense attitude and still do. Even though we have had a difference of opinions on several occassions. I like the fact that you have remained respectful throughout and continued to answer to my posts despite it all.
1 person likes this
• India
21 Apr 08
its a good strategy to add established members but i still think you must add new members when requested. anyways the reason i try to add members with more posts is that they are more active and more likely to respond to discussion.
3 people like this
• United States
21 Apr 08
I do add new members if they request it, I just don't go out of my way to find new members and request them myself.
1 person likes this
@p1kef1sh (45642)
21 Apr 08
I haven't experienced the problems that you have - yet! I have only asked six people to be my friend and have amassed nine pages of those asking me. I went through a phase of only accepting those that were posters to my discussion or vice versa. I am more generous now, although I am about to embark on a major cull. Fear not. You are not on that list.
3 people like this
• United States
21 Apr 08
I hope you don't come to experience those problems. I can't imagine anyone attacking you, but then again I never expected it myself. Yes, please don't delete me.
1 person likes this
@coffeebreak (17820)
• United States
21 Apr 08
Never hurts to do what you can to stay safe...no matter what it is you are protecting! But let me ask this,strickly out of curiousity as I have not heard it roll around before...to what advantage is adding more and more friends? THe more friends you have the more ___________________. I am very much enjoying the friends I have and the chats and such. But there is no way a person could respond to every discussion made by their friends if they have dozens and dozens upon dozens of friends. How many do you turn "on" to receive their "discussion started " "New response" emails in your box? How many do you have turned to off? IF they are your friends, why do do you have them on "off"? Then again one couldn't respond to so many posts, so............ if you can't chat with each of them, why have them as friends? Again, this is totally out of curiousity- I enjoy all my friends and our discussions and look forward to the most fun here at my lot and even more friends! It's just one of those questions that a practical person such as myself must ask! Absolutely no offense to anyone at all! Just shooting the breeze with my friend!
3 people like this
21 Apr 08
In general when I get a friend request I check out the profile and see what other discussions they have posted and responded to. I am quite cautious now, after seeing what has been going on here lately and have stopped making requests myself
2 people like this
@Thoroughrob (11756)
• United States
21 Apr 08
If someone requests me as a friend, they have to have a few good discussions for me to accept them. Some of these people are requesting and have a 0. Those, I definitely don't add. I also sometimes request friends from people that respond to my discussions.
2 people like this
@chiyosan (29383)
• Philippines
21 Apr 08
i add friends if they requested that of me... i tend not to add friends when i browse. :) though most of the time i get to reply to the discussions made by my friends on a daily basis... i still don't browse for members just to add friends.
2 people like this
@Sir_bobby88 (8245)
• Singapore
21 Apr 08
I am only intersted in true friends only , you could be my friends but i guess we would be only normal if i know you have a motive there .
2 people like this
@luvstochat (6914)
• United States
21 Apr 08
I usually don't send friend requests I do except everyone who sends me one though as I figure I can always delete them if I have to I always delete the ones who send me pms to join their site right after I accept their friend requests I do not like that at all!
2 people like this
@youless (89055)
• Guangzhou, China
21 Apr 08
In fact I feel the same. I tend to like to make friends with people who have more posts here. But actually anybody can be my friends. I just feel it's so amazing to have so many posts. I am so impressed.
2 people like this
@gemini_rose (16193)
21 Apr 08
Do you think that it is due to this that people get attacked then? I have always tended to just add anyone who wants to be my friend to my list, but I am realising just lately that the majority of friends that I am adding are not actually doing anything on here! I want to have friends that are actually active in posting good discussions and are active in responding too. I have been debating whether to go through and delete those that are not doing anything, but then I would feel a bit guilty!! I too am wondering whether to just go for those who are regularly active on here.
2 people like this
@Dasari100 (3803)
• Anantapur, India
21 Apr 08
We can seek good friends here and i think this site people are providing good platform to meet different country people so we can maintain longer relations ships with anyone it is totally depending up on mutual understanding between those people and i think most of the time they will stick for a long relations ship. In fact we both are maintaining long and friendly relations ship here.
2 people like this
• United States
21 Apr 08
KB, like you I tend to only add those folks that have been around the block here in mylot. With all of the recent, trouble as you have said already it is just safer. I will add new people, but if I start realizing that their posts are not of the caliber I am use to, or they start spamming me, I waste no time in taking them off my list. It might sound harsh, but it is just easier to keep the peace. Like you there have been unprovoked attacks on a few of my good friends, and you just do not know who you can trust when it starts.
2 people like this
• United States
27 Apr 08
I only seek out friends based on the discussions I've been in wih them. SImilar interests and ideas, or they are good conversationilsts. But it seems the people who request me as a friend are people with more activity than me.
1 person likes this
@MsTickle (24991)
• Australia
27 Apr 08
I used to seek out members with blue stars and high discussion rating. But then found that I was more interested in folk with lower discussion ratings so I added them. I still accept all requests for friendship but don't turn alerts on if they are new members or have input that doesn't interest me. Lately, I've started to delete these as many are inactive.
1 person likes this
@tjades (3593)
• Jamaica
24 Apr 08
I am roughly 44 post away from becoming a privileged mylot poster so I dont consider my self a newbie anymore. I am happy though that older mylotters were willing to take me under their wings and guide me including yourself. When I get a friend request I tend to check out their profile before I accept. I understand your point on old mylotters being more rational but in order to not make things harder for the newbies I think the qualty of their post is a good measure to use for friendship request or acceptance. (lol)
1 person likes this
• China
22 Apr 08
I agreed!
1 person likes this
• India
22 Apr 08
hmm.. i am a newcomer here,in the beginning i was just lookin to add persons with more number of posts as i thought these will be the persons who would have started more and more discusions and that will givew me more and more discussions to reply.. and that thing has worked for me and now i have many choices to reply from the discussions started by my friends.. i think everyone should do this when he/she is a newcomer..