Staying in a loveless marriage for the children!

I too am in a relationship where well Iam not really wanted but I know how much my lil Girl loves her daddy and well we really dont fight and he dont call me names very often I hate that we are like this since at one point in time he was my best friend and I am sorry that you have lived like this for 15 years its sad loving someone that dont love you back I wish you the best of luck!

Hi AW. I'm sad to hear about your marriage. I know first hand how hard it is to grow up in a broken home, but i adjusted and turned out fine thank god. I also remember how i felt when i heard my mom and my dad going at it.Believe it or not i understand what you,re going through,but children are very smart and they can tell when something is not right.It sounds as if your husband is verbally abusive, and thats not healty for your girls nor yourself.I was so hurt when my mom and dad seperated i thought my world would end, but i was also relieved to be rid of the tension that exsisted at that time.I can not give you reckless advice this is something that you have to figure out yourself.But i can say you deserve better.You can laugh outside your house, because it's the situation inside your house thats making you unhappy. I hope you get this situation resolved quickly so that you and your girls can have the happiness you deserve. {{hugs}}

Every situastion is different. But I do not think that it is necessarily better for kids to grow up with an unhappy Mother, and parents that do not love eachother. If we only have one life it would not be a good thing to spend it in missery. I hope you figure out what is best for you, and that you find out what will be best for you as a family. Good luck

you dont need to stay with him if he's like that.. if you're thinking about the children, i think they would be more bothered if they have parents which never act as couples.. he doesnt deserve you. you deserve someone that will make you happy and accept you for who you are..

hello dewr, i would say this is the same story of many womens lives and i totally disagree with this thought. if you think by being miserable you child would not sense it, all the more they would. what sense does it make being unhappy what happiness could you give your children after that. what if one day he curses you in front of those children then what?? what when your children grow up and leave you alone and carry on..where would you go then. i do not agree to the fat that you have to be with your husband miserable that would not make your children happy..

You are doing your children no justice by staying in a loveless marriage, especially if its abusive at all. If he will treat you that way, its only a matter of time before your girls start to get it. And don't think for one minute that the kids don't know what's going on, they are much more perceptive than we adults. When I was a mere 5 years old, I climbed up onto my mom's lap and asked her why she was lying to herself and everyone. She asked me what I was talking about, I said, you say you and daddy stay together for us, but its not true. You always fight and argue, and you're not happy. You hurt us together. Within a week or so dad was out on his lazy but-. Life didn't get better for us over night. It took my mother several years to truly gain her independence. But our lives were definitely better with out those to arguing and bickering all the time.

i am a product of a "stay together for the children" marriage. My mother had left my father and then went back to him when she found out she was pregnant with me (this was 1959). I paid for that decession all of my life! My mother resented me because she was "stuck" with a man she could barely tolerate and my dad hated me because i had inherited all the personality traits from him that he hated(lucky me).If you ask either of them they would probably deny this, but ask anyone else and they would agree with me. My parents fought (physically and verbley)constantly. I learned to cower in places where they wouldn't see me, because if my mom saw me she would beat me with anything handy and if my dad saw me he couldn't resist telling me how stupid, ugly and no-good in general i was (i perfered the beatings). You are doing your children no favors raising them in a home where they hear someone telling their mother that she is stupid (and probably a lot more). I divorced my 2 daughters father when my youngest daughter was 2. My parents said that i should stay with him until they were at least 15yrs.old that i didn't know how hard it was on children of divorce(my dads parents were divorced back in the 1940's, my g-mother was ahead of her time). I made it plain that my girls was not growing up listening to some man call me stupid, treating me like a doormat and doing a lot of other stuff that was none of anyone elses business but ours. They were furious over my selfishness but eventually got over it! I stayed single for 10yrs. and when i did remarry i married a wonderful man that loves me and would never call me names or treat me with disrespect.