UPDATE! USPS Trying Their Hardest to Adapt to Modern Age!

United States
May 7, 2008 7:30am CST
UPDATE! The USPS is trying their damnedest to adapt to a modern age of globalization and new-fangled "mail delivery" service! Recently a package was processed by a USPS processing facility nearby to its point of delivery in the very next state over (and it's those small northeastern states, too). This processing occurred on Sunday, three days ago. But we've JUST received word in that last night the package was processed AGAIN at the VERY SAME LOCATION!! That makes TWO processings within a three-day span! Things are really heating up for us here, and we expect the package to be processed at least one more time if not more within the next four days BEFORE leaving the facility it's been sitting in all this time. There it is expected that the package will be shipped to all 48 other states as well as the provinces of Canada before finally reaching its destination. Please expect 6 to 8 MONTHS for your delivery, because we have to get it over on our burro-powered squaremobiles. No word is in yet as to whether the USPS is relying on MapQuest for directions or not.
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