Single Mothers With Special Needs Children And Exes who wont help
May 18, 2008 4:27pm CST
I think its time to vent a little. Im sure im not the only one out there with this problem but I have been a single parent for the last 8 years.I have 3 children 15 14 and 11 and have raised them on my own. Their father is only in their lives when he wants something....My son is a non verbal autistic boy.His father has never taken the time to get to know what a wonderful child he is. He will take the girls if he has to well now he lives in another state but he is remarried and has his own kids ...We are always arguing because he wants to take his girls for a month to show off to his friends but refuses to take his son.He tells me he cant communicate with him.My son writes types and signs so there are ways of communicating and his dad has had 14 years to learn to sign.Then he wants to know why i get mad at him...I feel he should want to see all his children not just his girls who he wants to show off....Needless to say my oldest girl wont go she will watch her brother while i work she didnt want to go anyway but its a scary feeling knowing if something happens to me that my son will just be put away somewhere. I love my son more than anything in this world and would never want to see him in an institution.well i just want to see if any other moms go through this
• United States
18 May 08
It is very hard being a single mom with a child that has special needs. I know when my daughter was younger she wasn't able to have anything with dairy or soy in it because it would burn her intestines and she was on a feeding tube, had to have shots and other things. It never failed when she came back from her dad's she would be so sick and we would go back in time because he gave her something she wasn't supposed to have. I asked him one day why do you do this to her. I always thought he knew how sick it made her and wanted to make my life worse. He said to me "I want her to be normal." My response to him was she is normal she is normal for her. The divorce rate of parents with children with disabilities is so high and I think it is because one parent throws themselves into it and the other doesn't know how to deal with it and blames themselves. That is what happened to us anyway. I would encourage you to look at respite care and get it often so that you get a break outside of working. I was a respite care provider before I even had my daughter ( I believe that was a God thing preparing me) As for your ex well we can only hope that some day he sees the error of his ways. Also to give your son a fun thing to do check into a camp for him. This way he can go away for a period of time and have fun away from mom. I am always here if you need to talk!!