Why does the men allways pay at first dates ?

@CrashO (698)
Romania
June 21, 2008 10:10am CST
I mean, of course its nice us to pay, but most of the girls here, really takes it easy, now I have a gf and of course she pays when she has money, and sometimes she pays for me too, and then when I have money I'll pay for both etc. But allmost most of the time with girls, and friends I know, ALLWAYS pays for them, I mean I really find selfish for a girl not to pay her part at first dates or don't say anything at all, I'm not getting mad about the $ coz you do what you have to do to get a girl, but I really would think nice of a femal person to stand up and say she will pay her part, I would really consider her worth my time! Whats your opinion about that?
2 people like this
16 responses
@babostwick (2037)
• United States
21 Jun 08
I can't say for sure but it could have to do with being a gentlemen and it's not meant as anything malicious. If that happened and she said she wanted to pay, I can respect that wish. That's what I've learned anyway and that's how I could look at it. I've never had a situation like it saying she would but I wouldn't be opposed to it.
1 person likes this
@CrashO (698)
• Romania
21 Jun 08
yeah, i know that, but lets say she says "i pay for mine" and then you insist and its okey you'r a gentlemen, but nowadays were I live, they expect to buy you expensive drinks and say nothing!! :-\ atleast "thank you for a nice meal/drinks" would be nice, I mean yes men must be gentlemen, but they sure have to be equal right? :p doh! an date its not for only the men to see how the women will be, its viceversa!
• United States
21 Jun 08
Yeah that would be nice to be appreciated for it. I can agree there. If the situation happens, I wouldn't put up a fuss about it. I usually don't put up a struggle with it. If she wants to pay, I'd let her and that would be it.
1 person likes this
• Indonesia
22 Jun 08
Laugh - Not a sincere laugh
Well, since it mostly the men that invite us to the first date, I think it's only fair that the men pay for the first date. The dates after that wouldn't really matter because we would have pay for our part if necessary. Paying at the first date can also give us a good impression you know.
1 person likes this
• Indonesia
22 Jun 08
Ugh, I didn't mean for the picture to appeared here. I was uploading this picture for another response I was making. Sorry.
1 person likes this
@SomeCowgirl (32271)
• United States
21 Jun 08
Traditionally, a man always pays. It's just gentlemanly. A lady who does not make a fuss about it is only keeping up her persona. It would look bad if she'd asked to pay her half, especially in a public place. Also, most times, a woman doesn't know whether she should ask or not. My fiance doesn't have a job and didn't when we first met. He never once asked for us to go out to eat, but I would take him out to eat and pay for him. He would refuse and say he was not hungry when I knew he had to be starving as we had been out the whole day together. Eventually I stopped asking out of respect for him.
1 person likes this
@CrashO (698)
• Romania
22 Jun 08
yeap, good for you! :D men does have an ego! :D
@jonesy123 (3950)
• United States
21 Jun 08
It's just an old fashioned way to go about it. The girl was asked out, the person who does the inviting pays. It's just a sign of emanzipation that girls started to pay their share even on a first date....
1 person likes this
@CrashO (698)
• Romania
21 Jun 08
didn't know that, nice answer!
22 Jun 08
I think to impress the girl and to show respect on her. So if they have another date they will share to pay there bill.
1 person likes this
• India
22 Jun 08
May be this put gud impression of the boy on that girl.Girls are always in demand,so to get that we must have to pay sth rite?Anyway it doesn't matter who pays,but the progress of date makes the difference.
1 person likes this
@ayrin03 (318)
• Philippines
22 Jun 08
hmm.. I think the guys are the one who made move for that date. It's a sign of being gentleman. But we know all that there is a limitation in that. So, it's up to the girl if they will pay or not.
1 person likes this
• China
22 Jun 08
I think this depends^^ varies from people to people Yes,it's an old tradition,and I thinks girls don't that care this anymore
1 person likes this
@MagieL (266)
• China
22 Jun 08
it is an old fashioned way,i go out with my bf for the frist time,he paied for me.but now when we go out i often pay for mysilf,and sometimes pay for him.i think it shows fair.^^
1 person likes this
• Romania
21 Jun 08
it's odd that girls spend a lot of cash on expensive clothes, jewelry, perfumes, hair-cuts and stuff like that so she can look good to a guy, but she wont pay for a hamburger or a soda. of course it's nice that a guy pays. it shows attention and care. i'm a girl and i don't pay a lot of money on clothes and girl stuff and whenever i go out with my boyfriend i pay if i have cash and if he has cash he will pay or maybe we'll make 50-50. it really depends. but girls pay :D
1 person likes this
• Romania
21 Jun 08
it's odd that girls spend a lot of cash on expensive clothes, jewelry, perfumes, hair-cuts and stuff like that so she can look good to a guy, but she wont pay for a hamburger or a soda. of course it's nice that a guy pays. it shows attention and care. i'm a girl and i don't pay a lot of money on clothes and girl stuff and whenever i go out with my boyfriend i pay if i have cash and if he has cash he will pay or maybe we'll make 50-50. it really depends. but girls pay :D
1 person likes this
@cream97 (29169)
• United States
21 Jun 08
Because it shows respect for the woman.. It makes a lasting impression.. It looks odd for a woman to pay, not unless she insists on paying..
1 person likes this
22 Jun 08
you paid,just because you are a man
@CrashO (698)
• Romania
22 Jun 08
that's mean, were is the equal right here? :P
@tops76 (289)
• India
10 Jul 08
ya you are right. generally this happens. equally agree with you that females should object about this. now a days there is no differentiation between men and women then why this differentiation?
@joliefille (3697)
• Philippines
22 Jun 08
I'm a girl and I prefer to go Dutch though. I'd like to pay for my part. Society does put pressure on men to pay on the first date. For us girls, it kinda makes us feel special if a man pays on the first date.
• Indonesia
22 Jun 08
Because he want to give nice impression at the first moment they get together in date.And because He is a man.