how long have you been in a relationship?

@heart4u (409)
Philippines
July 24, 2008 8:49am CST
hi guys can you share how long have you been with your husband or wife or with your boyfriend or girlfriend? what can you advice so other can also get that long relationship with someone? me i had been in a relationship for almost 3 years and all i can say i could not ask for more and i wish that he will be the one i end up with because i feel like he was the one i want to be with for the rest of my life well the secret? just have an open communication and treat your partner not just only a partner but a your best friend also so guys comment please.
5 people like this
32 responses
• Philippines
25 Jul 08
My hubby and I are just 3 months married. We're a young couple and still struggling with our new life. We fight almost everyday but we make it a point that we solve our problem in less than a day. For us, fighting isn't all negative. It makes our relationship stronger especially on my part. Everytime we fight and reconcile I feel that my love for my hubby grows double.
• United States
27 Jul 08
I have to say, I understand you might be young, but the fighting will get old. You need to find a way to either stay calm in certainly situations or think about things see if they can be overlooked before getting in an argument about it. No one likes to fight, I know that you can feel closer to a person afterwards, but it's not a great reason for that. Your love for one another should grow everyday and you shouldn't ever have to question that. Fighting might bog you down, but of course you still love each other throughout it. When you are able to stop fighting as often though, it will bring a lot of that stress off of you two and help prevent less fights and a better overall relationship. You just got married and I'm sure neither of you want it to end anytime soon.
@reckon21 (3487)
• Philippines
25 Jul 08
[i]three years! that long,the secret is True Love! But sad to say were not together,she is a Muslim and I'm a christian. She is my first and true love.Until now I'm still hoping that we meet again.[/i]
25 Jul 08
love is a strong a emion who cares a bout relion go for it it is very rare to find a good and a effect relion ship go for it mate she sounds like the 1 in the end if there is a good u are porbley going to the same place and trust if u dont go 4 it u will recreat it
25 Jul 08
I have been with my fiance for almost 2 years, not too long, I know. My biggest advice is to learn how to disagree! And make sure you do it EARLY. When you disagree or have an argument, acknowledge and respect their point of view. Don't call them names, don't scream and throw stuff. Calm yourself, and move on! This will save you a lot of heart-ache in the end. DON'T pressure them into committing. People are ready to settle down and marry when they are ready, and trying to manipulate the outcome or speed up the process will only make your plan go the other way, and scare them off. Let them KNOW that you care about them and would like to "some day" settle down and have a family with them. But don't try to pressure them into doing it, unless you want to be single. When you want something, let it be known. When you feel something, let it be known. Bottling up your feelings and desires will only make you unhappy, and your partner won't know what you DO or DON'T want. If it bothers you that he is spending alone time with his ex girlfriend, TELL HIM! Or he'll think you are okay with it and keep doing it. Yes, there is that possibility of him feeling you're being too jealous, but if you don't tell him you don't like it, one day you will get so sick of it and lash out in a rage and seem even worse. :)
25 Jul 08
i agree
@zhizunbao (148)
• Sri Lanka
25 Jul 08
i have no good experience about long time relationships like that, just nearly one year for my love affair. but i think long time relationships are better. you should love your husband wife, .... not for what they have, but for who they are. and communication and good understanding is very important.. and be kind to them ..
25 Jul 08
i argee know some 1 is very inport int
@stcajo1 (99)
• Canada
24 Jul 08
Well another post I love because I get to talk about my wife. August 6th we will be celebrating our 20th wedding anniversary and before we were married we were together for 2 years. So i guess simple math puts us together for 22 years. There were tough times and good times but for the most part I have to say their were more great times other than anything else. As you my spouse is my best friend and life partner. Just a few simple things have made or union successful. We never go to bed mad even if that means staying up till 4 in the morning to straighten things out. We always tell each other that we love one another. A simple hug can go a long ways. Always ask each other how their day was and then just let them speak. Never argue in front of the kids. Even if you disagree about the way they are doing something with the kids you never tell them in front of the kids. Communication is key. I know there are a lot of people with great relaytionships out there but I always like to think of mine as the best. I found a jewel when I met my wife and life would just be miserable without her. Dale
@banunche (259)
• Philippines
25 Jul 08
nice marriage :) my parents have been together for 29 years now :)
29 Jul 08
dont u just ever wonder if there cheating are doing some thing u dont now a bout i now they porbley would not but do u ever wonder
@MaeTsuen (257)
• Philippines
25 Jul 08
i have been with my fiance for 7 years now and still going strong. advice... say sorry eventhough it was not your fault... pride will not do good in any relationship. it is not of importance whose fault it was... along the way both parties has faults. always say i love you and let your partner feel everyday how much you love him/her. surprise him in any way you can.... big or small stuff doesn't matter. when you have argument don't sleep or let it pass more than 24 hours... FIX IT B$ YOU GO TO SLEEp. =)
@x_rach_x (10)
25 Jul 08
Hey!! I have been with my boyfriend for over 6 ywears now...And I'm 21!!!!
@dlbruce85 (110)
• United States
25 Jul 08
I am 22 and my wife is 23, we started dating when we were both only 13. It will technically be 10 years that we have been together as of next January. I think the key is trust and communication, I know that sounds cliche, but it's true. We've had our share of fights, and I suppose we always will, but that's how you know if you are in a healthy relationship. If you can fight like arch enemies then make up 30 minutes later, I guess that's love,lol. No relationship is perfect, you just have to ask yourself, how much are you willing to endure to stay with this person? And how much will they endure to stay with you? You have to accept your partner as they are, both the good and bad. Our relationship has always been a learning experience, we've practically grown up together, and still we always learn new things about one another.
@banunche (259)
• Philippines
25 Jul 08
my boyfriend and i have been together for a year and a month now. actually, he's my first boyfriend :) i think the secret in a strong and stable relationship is it must be founded on friendship :) honesty, trust and love are important factors for a relationship to last :)
@TessWhite (3147)
• United States
25 Jul 08
Longest relationship I've had was with my ex husband. By the time the divorce was actually final, we had been married 21 1/2 years. To me it was about 20 years too long. LOL My current relationship just had its 8th anniversary.
@AshleyHasan (1024)
• India
25 Jul 08
I have been in relationship with my husband since I got married to him , he his very nice guy and infact he was my best friend before he understands me very well and never makes me to feel upset or sad I love my hub so much and rest of my life I stay with him only. All the best for your life!
25 Jul 08
all rite helo i know some 1 who likes me it just i dont now if i should go out with her she is great and all just all her relships hav end pertty quick and i perfer long lasting one has any 1 got any eveides
• United States
25 Jul 08
I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend now for nine months and going strong.
@academic2 (7009)
• Uganda
25 Jul 08
Hey heart4u, thanks for this post, it came so timely-today is my 15th wedding anniversary-we have two boys aged 15 and 13-the trick for us has always been tolerance-two people can never live without conflicts for 15 years! But we have always managed our conflicts well, accepting guilt and trying not commit the same mistakes too often-apologies have also worked. Commuication in everything we do has helped to promote trust and the sharing out of family roles, especially in the area of family support via finances-these have have kept us as one family unit!
@Rewards7 (30)
• United States
25 Jul 08
Honesty is the key to any relationship. In fact, if I cannot trust someone, I cannot love them. I have been with my current girlfriend for nearly 8 months, longest I've had yet. Because issues have come up in past relationships, also things where I found out I truly didn't like the person as anymore than a friend. If you are not open with a person, things will start to go south fast. Also, you shouldn't have to ignore things! Talk them out, it will always come to a better resolution, whether it turns out bad or not. Of course, you much legitimately care about the person as well, meaning when bad things happen you are genuinely concerned about them. Your partner should also be able to come to you about their own problems, even problems or things that are bothering him/her with your own relationship. There must be a decent number of things in common as well. Major things in common can typically over take many small differences. But, conflict is good in any relationship! Fighting is also ok, it's bound to happen and keeps your relationship healthy... Knowing those differences are there, and that you can get over your most stupid fights and love each other still is a great thing both people will enjoy and love to see in their partner. Of course, I could go on forever about relationships, whats good and bad, but I simply can't type it all haha. If you want to know anymore, feel free to post. Or if you would like some advice, I am more than happy to help. :)
• Philippines
25 Jul 08
Me and my Girlfriend are running for our 2nd year by next month. But my Longest relationship is with God hes with me since the time i had my life. He's always be with me all of the time. He doesn't leave me even though im a little bad guy sometimes. With my best friend we also have long way through. We've been bests of friends since kindergarten.
@shana123 (2096)
• India
25 Jul 08
This is my first time i'm in love which means i dint have any former relationship with anyone,we are together more than 1.5 years and now we are steading forward for marriage as soon as he comes down to our home country ,because he is in u.s for nearly a year for his job.All i can say is me and my guy have never been together most of the time but truly we are so close in hearts its all by GOD'S grace and love we are still together we have our ups and downs but he is so sweet and understanding one more than me so even we have misunderstandings even if the fault is in my part he forgives me and forgets it forever.I share all my things to him and i also tell him that i need to know all about him he understood my feelings and he also started sharing everything he does daily like where he went, what issues he faced that day ,what he had that day etc etc..
@ketybhagat (4125)
• India
25 Jul 08
I have been married for 22 years and am happily married. The secret of a successful relationship is understanding on both the sides. When there is love and understanding, one can fight all the circumstances in life. I dont say we dont fight or have differences, but we can sail through them because we also tend to forget the very next day. We dont keep grudges, so it helps a lot.
@zer0charly (5618)
• Philippines
25 Jul 08
my boyfriend and I we're on our 11 months now, and turning to 1 year this coming August. though it isn't as long as yours, this is really an achievement for me... I don't know on what's the secrets to have an "almost perfect" relationship or to have an smooth sailing relationship, but what we're doing is just enjoy our time together, and if there's a problem between the two of us, we always talk about it. we deal problems so that it wouldn't get more complicated. and we always do new things so that we'll never feel sick and tired to each other.. I just love him, and so happy to be with him.