Hearing a doctor telling you that you are gonna die

United States
August 24, 2008 5:52am CST
do you think its right for a doctor to tell you you are gonna die? i mean like if your chances are bad but its STILL possible that you could make it do you think its right for him to tell you that?? some people would hear those words and take to their bed and just wait for death where as some people would go out and live their lives to the fullest.. i know i have seen shows that the doc said your gonna die in __ amount of months and then they get a 2nd opinion and they make it and live 10 years longer.. if they hadnt had that 2nd opinion they might have just given up.. while i would of course want to know the odds do you think that doctors should really play up the fact that the odds are bad? obviously they have to say something to cover them from lawsuits but some doctors are just heartless in telling people.. if there was like a 20% chance my patient was gonna die i would tell them but tell them that i had seen people make it and try to find some examples of documented (of course not give away patient info) cases saying "hey this person was told that and made it and lived to an old age" etc.. or do you think that would lead to false hope and there for harmful??
8 people like this
12 responses
24 Aug 08
I would want to know. It would give me the chance to do the things that I have always wanted to do and do them instead of putting them off. I would want my doctor to tell me. If it turns out that he was wrong and I lived another 10-20 years then at least I would have lived them to the fullest. I am not the type of person to bury my head in the sand.
2 people like this
• United States
24 Aug 08
would you want the doctor to put a positive spin on it or just tell you straight out.. YOUR GONNNA DIE??
1 person likes this
25 Aug 08
I would like to think he would be sensitive about it and not just blurt it out. At least in the knowing it gives you time.
2 people like this
@4my1nonly (352)
• Philippines
25 Aug 08
I want to share my experience, my father is a seaman and when he come back last year, he felt something in his heart, and i know his also high blood.When my mother told him to go to the doctor, the doctor said his heart is getting larger, and "don't move too much" huh?! you know what my father do, he just lye on his bed and he really doesn't move too much, until his body gets weak. Then our neighbor ask him to go to other doctor for 2nd opinion, he does, there's no problem with his heart all laboratories findings was ok, the problem is "psychological problem" you know what i mean......Sometimes doctor can also have a false informations. For me, if the doctor said that I'm going to die, i should go to other doctor and if he has the same finding I'll accept it, i really want to know if I'm going to die than to kept it a secret to me, because i want to do the things that i need to do before i leave this world and my beloved ones to share my last happy moments with them.
2 people like this
• United States
25 Aug 08
i dont know if i trust the psychological diagnosis just because i was told that and then i found out i really did have something but the doctor didnt believe in that condition..
1 person likes this
@lingli_78 (12822)
• Australia
25 Aug 08
well, as long as he can be held accountable for his words and it is an honest opinion, then i don't think that it is wrong for the doctor to tell the patient... but if he only make an assumption and not realy sure about it, then it is better for the doctor not to make a judgement like that... for me, only God knows precisely when a person is going to die because He is the Creator... so even though the doctor tells me that i am going to die in X amount of time, i will still cling my hope in Him... take care and have a nice day...
2 people like this
• United States
25 Aug 08
i would research it no matter what i think since who knows when you have a good doctor or not sometimes
1 person likes this
• United States
24 Aug 08
I would not stop living life, and I will let fate be the final judge. If I am going to die, then I am going to die, if not, then no worries. I will just live life as I normally do.
2 people like this
@relundad (2310)
• United States
24 Aug 08
The reality of it is that we are all GONNA DIE and nobody knows when! But I know think that the doctor has an ethical obligation to diagnos your case, good or bad. And I think bedside manners are really important, in order to be able to translate the information to a patient. In real life I think that most doctors give an estimate of time based on the progression of the disease. The reality of it is that most terminal illness have phases and the doctor has not choice but to be able to pinpoint exactly where your body is on that scale. He has to know in order to treat the disease and tell you so that you know what to expect. Also I think that in order for the average person to react in a positive manner for acceptance of the treatment ahead, they also have to be somewhat blunt. I don't think if they told us something on the order of 'you have cancer and will probally live for the next 100 years', we'd subject ourselves to acting on it now. In the age that we live in now of medicine and technology, we are much more informed and will obviously research, inquire and seek the help and information that we need.
• United States
25 Aug 08
yeah i guess there is no way around it when there are stages since you have to know which to fight and how to do it based on how bad it is
1 person likes this
• Philippines
24 Aug 08
have you ever hear the final of Miss Venezuela during the miss universe 2008 in the final question. she stated that men thinks that the fastest way to get to the point is to go straight. the fastest way for a women to get through a point is to go curve and fix in every curve. in relation to this discussion, maybe if the doctor is male, he will directly say in a sorry manner that you are going to die, but if it is a female doctor, she will explain more things to calm you more until in the end, she will say that you are going to die...
2 people like this
• United States
25 Aug 08
hmm i wonder.. i never watch those pageants but i wonder if they are on to something
1 person likes this
• United States
25 Aug 08
i would want him to tell me the chances. and tell me how long he thinks i would last. i dont think a dr. would just look at you though and say your going to die just like that. they usually give you expected life rate and other stuff like that
1 person likes this
• United States
25 Aug 08
what scares me is when they give you days or just a few weeks/months to where its so short you cant do much and if your that sick then you usually cant do anything
@oreed8 (77)
• United States
25 Aug 08
well it depeneds, the doctor jobs is try to hope for the best first do whatever it takes, cause i know some doctors dont evening try. and it true what u say about da doctor being heartless some of them dont evening care if u going 2 die our not. they supose to say he seem people make it...and that would gave his patient (hope) thats all we ask for.. anything is possible... nobody wants to hear that they going 2 die.
1 person likes this
• United States
25 Aug 08
a lot of docs are so cold its unbelievable!!
@Elixiress (3878)
24 Aug 08
I think it is right for them to be honest. I do not think that they should tell you you are going to be fine, when you are not, but at the same time I do not think that they should tell someone they are going to die, when they are going to live quite a long time. So honesty is the best option, explain that they could live for x amount of years, but they should also add that people can out live the estimations.
1 person likes this
• United States
25 Aug 08
yeah but its amazing how many leave out that there is a chance of survival though
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
24 Aug 08
i would want to know the truth no matter what. i'm that way by everything.
1 person likes this
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
25 Aug 08
well, let's hope the best for both of us. greetings from tennessee.
1 person likes this
• United States
25 Aug 08
i always prepare myself for the worst on anything as is so i guess a doctor wouldnt really even have to before i would freak out lol
• Australia
25 Aug 08
I think that Dcotr should be honest about what treatment is available including alternative treatments - giving a time prognosis can only be an estimate - but I would want to know if the prognosis was poor or good. I beleive that the truth is the only way to go as well.
1 person likes this
@walkthetalk (1307)
• United States
24 Aug 08
I not sure I have told this on my lot. I've had cancer. it has been 18 years, and I was cured, with chemotherapy and radiation. My dad Also had cancer and past away. We had the same Doctor. When I had cancer the doctor said there was a 99 % chance he could cure me. WE caught it early. When my dad got cancer it was not caught in an early stage. But the doctor said he could not predict a life. He said, you could leave his office and have a car wreck. My dad only lived 3 months. We had a very good doctor, and he done all he could.....
• United States
25 Aug 08
thats interesting and a good thing you both had the same doctors.. my mom had the same one her dad had so he knew what to look for better and more in advance and it definitely saved her life.. and yeah he is right about the predicting life thing
@Omose14 (58)
• United States
25 Aug 08
if i herd that i was going to die, i will die right there on the spot..lol
1 person likes this
• United States
25 Aug 08
i know thats what im afraid of.. people going into shock and then freaking out and wasting too much time stuck in freak out mode to enjoy the time they have left