At what age is it ok to let your kids go out to play on their own?

@Humbug25 (12540)
August 26, 2008 4:46pm CST
My eldest son is 7 years old and is dying to make a break for freedom to go out and play with his friends. I trust my son but it is other people I don't tust even though we do live in a safe area, there are a lot of people around that I don't know. I don't want him to be one of the kids that I see hanging around on the corner of the streets! Lately I have allowed him to go across the street to his friend's house but have told him that he is only to play in the house or the garden of his friend and must be home by a certain time of course. Is 7 years old too young for a child to be going out to play on their own? Am I being too strict with him and should I allow him a bit more freedom?
4 people like this
10 responses
@sedel1027 (17846)
• Cupertino, California
26 Aug 08
Depends on the 7 year old and what their friends are like. When my son was 7 we were in an apartment complex where there were a lot of kids. I had no problems with him going to play with them or going over to their houses to play. I would think teenagers would do more hanging out on the corner more than 7 yr olds would.
2 people like this
@Humbug25 (12540)
26 Aug 08
Hi there sedel1027 Well I have seen some kids of my son's age hanging around but I think they are with their older siblings which I still wouldn't be happy with. I think my son wants to feel like he is the older brother and do things away from his two younger brothers, which I totally understand, it's just hard to let go sometimes isn't it? Cheers
1 person likes this
@sedel1027 (17846)
• Cupertino, California
27 Aug 08
It can be. The best thing to do is set some limits for him and see if he can follow the rules. Let's say he goes out to play at 4:30 and dinner is for 5:30. Give ihm a watch and tell him be back in the house at 5:30. If he follows the rules, he can get a bit more freedom. Don't get me wrong, I like when my son brings his friends over to our place so I can "keep an eye on them", but sometimes they need to play outside!
1 person likes this
@MH4444 (2161)
• United States
27 Aug 08
Well, it was fine when I was a kid. I remember watching my goddaughter; and I never let her our of my sight when she was that age. I would go with her to play dates. Maybe talk to the parents locally and see if they have ideas on how you as a neighborhood can organize to protect your children as they play: like a community watch. Hope that helps.
@Humbug25 (12540)
27 Aug 08
Hello MH4444 Hmmm that might be an idea but I don't actually see many of my neighbours a lot, just a quick nod of the head in passing, we are a very busy neighbourhood I guess!! Cheers
@cher913 (25782)
• Canada
27 Aug 08
i think 7 is good but with some perameters in place. like he cant go past the corner or he cant cross the street, that sort of thing. we live in a complex, so its a little easier because there isnt as much street traffic etc.
1 person likes this
@Humbug25 (12540)
27 Aug 08
Hello cher913 We don't have too much traffic where we live either but when people do drive around our house they aren't always looking out for kids. If I was to let him play in the street on his bike or skateboard then I would have to be out there with him and then his 2 younger brothers would want to come out too which would mean that I would need eyes everywhere!!! Cheers
@metschica25 (5399)
• United States
27 Aug 08
Hello I started playing with my friends alone when i was around 7 or 8 , but i was always with my brother . and my parents , or their parents were around too . It depends on the child too and the kind of friends he has . It is always best to be safer than sorry when it comes to kids .
1 person likes this
@Humbug25 (12540)
27 Aug 08
Hello metschica25 Sometimes we think we know our kids inside and out but they can be unpredictable sometimes and do something totally out of character. I know my kids have done things that I would never expect them to do, not that it has been something bad, but just something that I would never think they would do! Cheers
@Sheepie (3112)
• United States
27 Aug 08
I wasn't allowed to do this until I was too old to play, these days it's horrible how clingy parents are. I say let him go play, and make sure he is well aware of who to stay away from and how to be careful. Let a kid be a kid! You really do have to trust him.
1 person likes this
@Humbug25 (12540)
27 Aug 08
Hi there Sheepie He seems to be quite happy with the freedom I have given him so far and I am all for letting kids be kids cos they grow up so darn quick these days but it is other people I worry about and my son is very easily led and believes everything he is told be older kids! Cheers
• United States
27 Aug 08
get ur son to be friend with ppl like 14's nd 15's, im 15 trust me ur kid will thank u nd trust him wit everytin u got let him out nd have food aint no 1 gon get on him if he wit ppl.
1 person likes this
@Humbug25 (12540)
27 Aug 08
Hi there domplatano2 My son is only 7 and I don't think he is old enough to be hanging around with kids twice his age as they will teach him things that he doesn't need to know yet!! Cheers
@p1kef1sh (45681)
27 Aug 08
When I was 7 Humbug I lived in a small village where you couldn't sneeze without everyone knowing that's what you had just done! If I did something it would be back with my Mum a long time before I got home!! In the Summer we were put out first thing in the morning and returned for lunch; going straight out again afterwards until tea. Then we were in. Nowadays I wonder if there is a child anywhere in the UK that can live like that. Our daughter was allowed to visit her friends in the road when she was about 7; but not allowed out of the road for at least two more years. Although she did occasionally run to the post box in the next street. But she had a time to get there and back. I'd let him go to his friend's house on his own. But watch him all the way there. As you are doing now. I guess that it is a gamble. Set him a time. Say two hours out and back by such and such and not to go further than so far. If he does that well, then slip the rein a little. It's a nerve wracking time to be a parent.
@valeria1 (2721)
• United States
26 Aug 08
I think you are doing just fine! It is good that you invite the kids to your house also so you can check better and fell comfy! I do not see anything bad in that is great for him to have friends of his age! No problem!
1 person likes this
@Humbug25 (12540)
26 Aug 08
Hello valeria1 Yes I do think I am doing the right thing and at least I know where he is and he is safe, he's just playing some computer game with his friend or something like that and I can literally call over to him from our house if I need him in a hurry! Cheers
@iyah10 (4115)
• Kuwait
27 Aug 08
No, you were not so strict with taking good care of your child to play with their own with another place or house of the playmates which it will cross across the road or cross side of the road to protect her.him safety with the friends attitude so I do agree with you to to let him play with your own place in which you could see him by your eyes because 7 years old cannot manage for his own because I allowed myself to played alone in their own in the other places when he is 10 years old........
1 person likes this
@Humbug25 (12540)
27 Aug 08
H iyah10 It is nice that I know he is not too far from me but I still worry that he might decide to down the road with his friend because his parents say he can. I have told him that he must check with me first. I know his friends father allows his son to play in a nearby field alone but I have told my son he can't because it is out of sight of our house and I am worried about older kids that might be there! Cheers
@titagdl (136)
• Mexico
27 Aug 08
Hi!! I think if he´s old enough to want more independance he should have a little,I mean yes, give him permission to play outside,or go to a friends house but with rules, remember COMPROMISE!!! He can go outside alone,but keep an eye on him, have him be at certain places only, make sure he understands the limits, ok you can play outside but only on this block or something like that. And keep an eye on who he plays with too!!
1 person likes this
@Humbug25 (12540)
27 Aug 08
Hi there titagdl This is the problem isn't it? I mean getting it right, you don't want to be the parent who never lets her child play with the other kids but you don't to be the parent who doesn't appear to care about with who or where their child plays. Cheers