what will you do if your friends make you to spend on them again and again?

India
September 19, 2008 6:20am CST
i hate those who make me to spend agaun and again on them but they never spend.i tell them i don.t have enough money or forgot to bring money. don.t you get angry?
3 responses
• Philippines
19 Sep 08
hi! you are so right. i also get angry when people are abusing my generosity. they just let you spend and spend and spend without even thinking of returning the favor. I have experienced this before, in my old school. My friends, or so i thought, would always ask me to pay for something that they bought. Since this are just small items, i feel okey in paying for it. But after sometime, i have noticed that they are now asking me to pay this and that in regular intervals. I am not a person who expects something in return for the things that i do for them, but in this kind of situation you can now see how the events are turning. they let you spend and spend, then when your resources are nearing its end, they would look for another victim. Thankfully for me that before this would happen a concern friend of mine, talked to them when they are again asking me to spend some money for them. She told them that they shouldnt even buy anything if they cant afford it. She even went as far as calling them vampires, that sip the very life out of you. After she told them this, they suddenly put a wall between us. They dont talked to me as often as before, they have now their own circle of friends(and im excluded from it), and they are distanced in everything, when i talked to them, when i asked something and the like. I am lucky now because my set of friends in my new school are kind. and they believe in give and take. So everything is going alright for me now. But the lesson that i have learned from before could never be erase. So my advice for you, do not be afraid to speak up to people whom you feel are abusing you. But dont be to suspicious of other people, that you forget to be giving anymore. Also it is better to give than to recieve. When you give, God has something in store to replace what is lost. and most of the time it is much better than before. Happy giving and happy mylotting!
• United States
19 Sep 08
Hi!It is very upsetting when people are constanly depending on you.It really stinks when they expect everything to come from your wallet,just be real and honest sometimes the truth does hurt,but keeping it real is better.If this friend is not willing to give back then they do not need to ask of you,fair is fair.Next time you go somewhere bring your money and pay for your things seperatly they will get the hint and do not feel bad ,they obviously do not care about you and your feelings,sometimes you just have to be that way,you will then know if they are a true friend or just someone using you.
19 Sep 08
Hello and yes it is upsetting. Spread out over the years i wouldn't doubt i've spent hundreds of dollars on friends. And i was in one incident at one time where my friend NEVER paid for anything and i always had to pay for everything. It eventually made quite the impact on my financial status because at the time i was paying for a lot of things (bills, gas, etc) and i did not have a job that allowed me to do such things. Anyway, i finally ended up talkind to my friend, things were taken out of proportion, and didn't go to well. Eventually tho it settled down and my friend supported themself. My point being you may need to talk to your friends sometimes and its may not go well at first, but somethings just have to be done. I think you should still try and settle matters between you two even if you both have moved on to new friends tho.
@katkat (2379)
• Philippines
22 Sep 08
For me it’s not bad to treat your friends occasionally but if you’re the only one spending for time and it’s became more often, it’s about time to say no when they ask you again to treat them.
• Malaysia
20 Sep 08
Its annoying... But when u notice those friends are always like that pattern, just avoid of going out with them. Or when they invite u to go out, ask them whether they bring enough money or not. Just directly ask them, and tell them u r not going to spend much money that day before u go out with them.