Ever Had A Friend Stop Talking To You?

United States
September 30, 2008 1:17pm CST
Has anyone here ever had a friend completely stop talking to you? I've had one person who was a friend do that. To this day I still have no idea why she stopped talking to me and refused to have anything to do with me. Everything was going great between us and we really hit it off. Then one day, she just stopped talking to me and never talked to me since. That was a little over three years ago. The odd thing is that around the same time, there was another girl I was friends with who did the exact same thing. One day just randomly quit talking to me for no reason. As I said, to this day three years later, I still have absolutely no idea why they stopped talking to me. Has a similar situation happened to you?
3 people like this
17 responses
• United States
22 Jun 10
i have this problem going on now.. im 14 YEARS OLD freshmen in highschool and this is our summer to remember.. && for no reason my best friend (something like sisters) just completely stop talking to me(for what reason idk) but i know i did nothing wrong.. but at the same time that is very sad to do that to somebody that does everything for you..it hurts a little but anyways.. i just want her to be woman enough to tell me whats going on so i can fix it because i would hate to lose our friendship because we always said we would be friends til the end.. BUT I GUESS THIS IS THE END FOR US just didn't think it would happen like this..How do i move on? What do I do at this point? Help somebODY!!! && JUST STOP TALKING FOR NO REASON i cant belive her.. ps.) but she is going through alot at home but she does this to many people..but i didnt think she would do this to me because we were to close i mean very very close for that..(not lesbian close) but we were sisters.. i just dont know what to do its been like a week from now..!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
• Canada
16 Jul 11
Hey there. I'm 27. I don't really have many friends and if I do they are guys. Except for my sister. Not blood but u know what I mean. We met in highschool 15 yrs old. We have been through everything together good and bad. We lived together in an apartment then later On my guy and me bought a house instead of a condo so she could live with us and have the basement for herself. All in all we lives together for 5 years. We would still talk but for three yrs she didn't work. Then all of a sudden 9 months ago I hadn't been hearing from her or no texting so I asked what was up and the only thing she said was ". I need more time" so I assumed she needed space. Even though when we did live together we didn't do much. I have a chronic pain illness and can't do a lot. But both of us lived in the same house, neither of us worked and we still didn't really do much together. So now it's 12 years since we met. She's had nine months of space ( we still texted regularly) but she has a new friend from work and that's when all this started. We are exactly two weeks apart in age and have spent EVERY SINGLE birthday together since we met and 2 days ago we didn't. I had asked her the week before what she wanted to do and when or if at all and she just kept saying "I don't know ... We'll see" and now I can't even get a response through text. Not phone or in person. She lives 2 blocks from me and won't answer her door I did nothing. I have a therapist as I'm an anxious person but we spend ALL our time talking about this and my friend. My therapist said that I have tried for months and done everything I can and am the only one in this relationship now. She said my friend is being very immature and basically what is happening is she is breaking up with me. ( not like that) And I cant believe it cause in 12 years I have been her ONLY friend and vice versa. And now this. I have sent so many texts. I wrote her letters so she knows how I feel and is still putting me through all this b.s. And it is not fair. Therapist says I deserve the respect of an answer or even just a call saying ANYTHING. has anyone out there had a friend like this for so long just cut u off like you never existed? If so please email me. maloriepalinka@gmail.com
30 Aug 11
I had a similar situation where my friend of about 12 years told me that she didn't like the person I was. It became so awkward that I didn't really want to be around her for a while. We went out drinking one night and we had quite a few drinks, it was so awkward that I ended up leaving with out saying goodbye. She was really angry and sent a harsh email and defriended me on FB. I couldn't email her back, I figured that she doesn't actually like me. It has been the hardest thing I have had to do. I trusted her and I feel like she broke my heart. I can understand that you go to a therapist, I would love to talk about it more. But then, I dont want to think about it anymore. I want to know how to get over it - does your therapist have any suggestions?
• Philippines
1 Oct 08
Hi there DarthJustice! I do have a friend who stopped talking to me for reasons I do not know. Well, at least for several months. Two months ago, we started talking again. But he would not still tell me what his reasons were for just shutting me off. He just keeps telling me that he doesn't want to talk about it and that he is okay now. Well of course, I would still like to know what his reasons were. Well, maybe someday. Another person who stopped talking to me is my own bestfriend. I am at a loss as to why she stopped talking to me. It just happened one day and to date, I do not have any idea what gone wrong.
• United States
1 Oct 08
I'm the same way. Even today, in the back of my mind, I still have the faint hope that one day she'll write me on Facebook (she still has me on her friend list believe or not) telling me why she did me the way she did or something. I mean I know after three years it most likely isn't going to happen, but still. It really hurt because it wasn't like I had a whole lot of friends to spare and I still believe we would have still been best friends today if she hadn't stopped talking to me. But, I guess it's like what this other girl I know once said about the whole thing: "Some people are just weird."
• United States
30 Sep 08
Yes, I have had this happen to me before. One friend of mine kind of stopped talking to me for no apparent reason because I know that I didn't do anything wrong. When I finally talked to her about it, she completely had the wrong idea of what was going on or what supposedly took place in the situation. Luckily we worked it out.
• United States
30 Sep 08
I'm glad you were able to work things out. I tried to find out what she thought I did (because like you, I know I did nothing wrong). Unfortunately she never would return any of my messages so I was never able to find out anything.
• United States
30 Sep 08
Yeah, that has happened quite a bit to me, too, over my life. I did find out a couple of times that it was because of rumors about me that were totally untrue and even slanderous. In my opinion, any friend that suddenly stops talking to me without an explanation does not deserve to be my friend.
• United States
30 Sep 08
You're right. Anyone who would do someone like that doesn't deserve to be your friend.
@kenzie45230 (3563)
• United States
30 Sep 08
I have had that happen. Back when I was in high school - in my senior year - my best friend quit talking to me. She wouldn't say what I had done wrong. Over 20 years later, having lived in 3 other states, I finally found her again. (She married and I didn't know her married name and had to have a mutual friend tell me.) When I contacted her, she remembered being mad but had no idea why.
• United States
30 Sep 08
Did you two continue talking after you contacted her or anything?
• United States
4 Mar 12
WEll it is a little bit early to say difinitevely if the friend will stop talking for good for good. because he only stopped talking to me 2 days ago and it seemed rather abrupt. this person and I became friends while working together 14 years ago and while we don't always see each other he always seemed to care a great deal for me and always look out for me as I did in return. I admit I probably made what I consider to be a very minor error but it is still totally shocking. and I do admit I should have been slightly more careful. Albeit I am not totally sure why. This person had an issue with a female that he was trying to get out of a relationship with. now a couple days ago he told me it was totally over and than told me not to tell her anything at all about anything, that no matter what is asked I don't know, but that I can tell this person it is over, nothing else. Mainly I was told about specific personal things that he was doing himself he clearly didn't want known. now when this lady called me she stated she just needs to know for sure so she can move on or not. but see she said he stopped talking to her suddenly out of the blue although I know there was tension brewing. but she was still rather shocked and just "wanted to know why, why can't I be told at least that?" so she persisted and persisted and persisted and I had told her waht I could tell her, than I also added one of the reasons the male said pissed him off about her and I accidentally spilled it out not realizing it and than hem hawed making it as if I amnot really sure if that was totaly sia donly that I thought there was something along the lines. then after that she asked other questions to which I did not divulge a word at all about antyhing. she somehow got a hold of him despite being bloced and mentioend what I had stated,although what I stated was not anything whatsoever to do with anything personal. and also if you think about it, the result of her chasing him and calling anyway and being the way she was would not have had any diffrent results either way. I am only saying I think this is what it may be. this male called me a little later and sounded very angry and wasn't let me talking and asking if I told her anything and when I tried to talk wouldn't let me talk and than started saying what I told you to say yesterday is such and such so i trid to get in a word and said I only said that and the one thing and than he kept interrupting me and in then out of nowhere he said not to call him anymore. Well I actaully composed an email, not accusing him of anything, just keepting to what I may have done wrong and that I am truly sorry and in no way meant to hurt anyone (albiet, I don't see how it could) but I thought about it the next full day and thought even more of what I should say so I tried to compose a msg. it was blocked. than a social media site I was on was clearly blocked, didn't even try contacting him there. and so that is where it is. perhaps this individual thought I betrayed trust? but I am also a super honest person and won't lie even if I think it is the wrong answer. I just won't. But again, he never said don't talk to me because of this or that, I am only making assumptions. although I know this person has a situation involved outside ofthis as well that between everything is causing him to be stressed beyond belief. so who knows? anyone have anything like this?
@webgirl01 (694)
• United States
13 Jul 11
It would pain to hurt me if this happened. this has happened probably years ago. i hate people who just stop talking to you and give weird looks. that's why i think most people suck. I wish i had loyal and true friends. oh wells.
• United States
9 May 11
Yep, I've had that happen - very recently actually. I think it's because he's jealous of my new boyfriend. (he told me he was in love with me about a year ago, and we started 'dating'. It was a long-distance relationship, and then he always cancelled his plans to visit me. So he broke it off - after someone randomly cancels plans because work is more important 4 times, I'm done, so it was OK. I think if you love someone, you should do everything possible to see them when you can). I love him dearly, and he's always been my best friend. He's dating new people - I don't understand why it's ok for him to completely stop talking to me just because I'm dating someone new, when I wouldn't be able to get away with it. He even went so far as to block me from his Facebook page. I agree with some of the other posters - people who do that just aren't worth your time anymore, no matter how important they were in your life. Time to move on and make new friends!
• United States
6 Sep 10
Yes! right now I am in completely shock because I had a friend that stopped talking to me for two years and she even changed her phone number and never called me back and I still do not know whay, but after this two years last week I found her working in the same place that I work right now and not only that she will be working directly with me for at least a week, when she found out that she will be working with me she tried to talk to me when this happened I asked her why did she changed her phone number and she gave me the most ridiculus answer I ever heard she said that her little nephew destroyed her phone and she had to switch her number. Now I do not know what is going to happen or what to do, we use to be the best friends and we use to do everything together and now I do not think she was really my friend, I would like to know what is your opinion what should I do with her at work?
@annavi23 (6306)
• Philippines
22 Jul 10
hmmm...i really don't know,but i think there is,but i just don't mind them. for some reasons,i am like that also.i stopped talking to my friend whom i trusted the most because she was my bestfriend when i'm in highschool.we never get along for sometime then we met again after long years,then i gave her my whole trust but what did i get in return?she just did what she had just to make me feel bad at her.then she still consider me as her friend after losing my trust on her?what kind of friend is that? it's better to live separate ways than have her as a friend.i can't call a friend who disrespect me and had done some stupidity!
• United States
22 Jul 10
I've had this happen recently, and many times in the past. It's always incredibly hurtful. A few weeks ago I hung out with my friends Laura and Carla on one night and Carla was very rude and aloof to me and just wasn't her usual self. Then a few days later I was with Carla, our friend Michaela and Carla's friend Anna. Again, Carla was rude and acting strangely and distant and dismissive. She's been acting very selfishly and unusually most of this summer too. And Michaela's been even harsher to me this summer than ever. She's incredibly patronizing and acts like I'm worth nothing. Now, moving on...so on that one day when it was the four of us, Anna and I were very much ignored. So there I was, making conversation with this poor girl who only Carla knew, who was very nice as Carla and Michaela went off like petulant five year olds and ignored us and whispered and told each other things (God only knows what) that they wouldn't share with the rest of the group. So all of these incidents piled up prompted me to take action, and I did. I texted Carla politely and listed what concerned me and how it hurt me and I just wanted to talk it out. So if she could contact me that'd be great. Three weeks later and I still haven't heard from her. Yesterday I texted her again and left a message (she didn't pick up when I called obviously.) And I asked Michaela what was going on but she CLAIMED she didn't know. She treated me as if I was a huge nuisance and a burden and was very dismissive, surprise surprise. Then she said her and Carla got together without inviting me and obviously that didn't look good. She claimed she was having a personal problem and "Carla was there for her when she needed a friend." And said it in a way as if I am not a friend or something. I just felt so far away and I told her that I've felt this way, and left out and all but she just ignored me. I decided to send one last text to them and say one last damn time how I'm upset, hurt and have a vibe that something definitely is going on and if they called we could work it out. Haven't heard back yet but if I do, I'm sure it won't be good...especially with hotheaded, dismissive Michaela who acts like it's such a chore to make human contact with one of her alleged best friends AKA me every now and then. (She's fond of throwing around the "I'm very busy" excuse to pardon her as well as Carla's behavior.) Anyway, if they respond I think I will delete it but if they call then I will be glad because communication is the key. Execpt as of right now and the past few weeks, they have been staunchly against it. I've been dropped like a hot potato without an explanation. It hurts and that's why for a bit I was persistent with getting some explanation but now I've realized there may be NO ideal closure and I need to let it go. Friends who don't talk to you obviously aren't your friends. I think I was in denial since they were my supposed best friends in high school, we were like sisters. Time to move on. College brought me loads of more friends who I'm so much closer to anyway.
• United States
8 Jul 10
Yes. I was texting this so called "friend" and usually this person responds really quickly but each response took a few hours (I was really bored and sadly I don't, have a life) I wouldn't mind if this person did this normally but they don't this person is constantly texting. So I stopped texting that person for a little bit and then tried again (you know second chances maybe that person just had something going on) same thing. The weird thing is a week before we went to the mall and I thought we had fun, guess not. The thing is I was moving far far far away and told this person and they were acting all sentimental and what not. Saying all this crap and I actually had to stay longer and when I texted this person that thats when this person got shady and deleted me as a contact from somewhere (not saying), never saying anything else too me not even trying to contact me so I deleted this persons phone number and erased all the pics I had of this person and et cetera. No explanation why. People just suck and don't even tell you what the problem is. They just erase you from their life and I thought we were somewhat close b/c I shared alot w/ this person but oh well....lifes a downer sometimes. Alot of people aren't even worth it...once you get to know people they change.
@webgirl01 (694)
• United States
22 Apr 10
Hey there! how are you? anyway i think i had a friend that once you meet them and get to know them for a few times and then they ignore you or give glares. It hurts, I had that before. Sometimes I think people suck. It sucks how people are your friend and then after awhile they diss you. I think i know some friends like that.
• United States
21 Apr 10
Wow. Yes, this is happening to me right now and has in the past. NO REASON AT ALL. This time, it is my closest friend for 5 years now. He just dissed me, not calling me.. he did this months ago and said he was giving me space. Now is doing it again. I also had another gay friend of mine stop talking to me a year ago and refused to answer my calls.. NO REASON everything was great. Then a year later, I had to talk to him on the phone regarding a work issue and he texted me and said he missed my friendship. We have never discussed why he stopped talking to me to this day. I keep wondering if it is me? Why would someone do that to their closest friend? I am fed up with it. Hard to trust people now.
• India
24 Mar 10
yes i have had xperienced the same situation ........not jus once but 4 times; but i have not completely lost them....i dont xactly know what i 've done. they jus quitted talking to me...... but after some months two of them started talking to me again.... i dint dare to ask them what actually happenned!!!!!! and the rest two.......... i approached one of them. .......nd i apologised before him ...for my unknown mistake!!!!! then everything was ok for a week....later on we got dispersed...and eventhough we had a chance to meet i dint dare to do that......i dont know why!!!!!!! and the remaining one ....his story is going on...i dont know how it ends....im doin my best not to lose him
@Porcospino (16177)
• Denmark
5 Mar 10
When I went to nursing school I had two close friends from my class. We did all of our projects together and we spent a lot of time together. I liked both of them very much and we got along really well. When we left the school we kept in touch, but one of the girls suddenly stopped talking to me. If I asked her if we could meet she had plenty of excuses and she stopped calling me and writing me. I didn't know what was wrong and she didn't answer my questions. I talked to my other friend about it, and she said that our friend had been doing the same thing when she tried to talk to her. She also told me that she had met our friend at the busstation one day, but our friend completely ignored her and refused to talk to her. We both found that very strange and we couldn't help wondering if we had done something which had hurt her or offended her, but we never found out what the problem was, because she simply refused to talk any of us.
• India
10 Feb 10
i had a friend who was talking to me very nicely we use to talk with me so much that everyone started thinking that something is going on between us and he immediately stoped talking to me now in this case i have not done anything why is he not talking to me? i tried to make him up by sending an e-mail but he deleted my e-mail what should i do.