how to handle pre-teens kids...

At this stage in her life your daughter needs you more than ever. Don't overwhelm her with overboarding her, however, make sure to sit down and talk to her as much as possible. Ask your daughter to be very open with you and let her know that she can come to you for anything that she needs to talk about. Tell her that even though she's going through a rough time in her life, you are there for her always, as a mother should be. Try to talk to her as much as possible, make sure that the walls do not close between you and her because then she will be more apt to hide things from you, and no mother wants that. She is turning into an adult, and remember, at that age everyone wants to be older than they really are, so make sure to stay tuned into her and make sure that she knows that you'll always be there for her emotionally. Great discussion, be sure to let everyone know how it is going.

I only have had my boys go threw the preteens and the teens and I believe that they are much different than girls. My boys got very moody. I would say something and I didn't know anything! Finally I just stopped talking to my 14 yr old. He would ask me something and I would say, "I have no idea, remember I don't know anything." This went on for about a week or so and he got the message. Then he would just laugh and say, "OK, I got it mom, now what do you think." I guess putting some joking into it helped. My daughter is only 8 and she already is moody! I think she is the one who is going to give me gray hair! When she gets in her moods, I tell her to please leave the room or I will have to. If she doesn't, I do and just remove myself from her attitude. She usually will follow me and say she is sorry. Times that she doesn't follow me, she just needs her space to work things out and I give her that. It takes me out of the firing zone.

Oh my... i have no idea... because my daughter is only two years old... so i would be waiting to see the responses to this discussion so that i can prepare myself when my daughter is at that stage... but i guess i would start giving her more responsibilities... and a little independence... maybe that would help...

OH Nhey, I too have a child going through the same things as yours....She is 12 going on 17...at least she thinks she is. She is very arguementive and moody. One minute she is cheerful and friendly to everyone, next she can become grouchy....Thankfully we only see her on the weekend because she is my step daughter and lives with her mom...which does mean she isn't as cranky with us as she is with her mom...but it is good because she knows she can not get awaw with things her because her father won't put up with it for long, she can be pouty with him, which infuriates me...but I can't do much about it...she isn't mine. But she has come to me to talk about things so we have a good relationship and that is all that matters. As long as they are aware that someone is there for them. Her mom is good too for talking with her and being very open, but i'm sure there is alot of tension in her house for they just had a new born baby added to the home...But being there to talk to them is a great idea and given her more freedom...because she is a growing young lady....I try to treat her like an adult but I find it hard because she is only 12...and she considers herself an adult...but she isn't and I don't think she should be treated fully like one when she isn't one...she will start assuming that she can do some things when she can't. All that said she will be a handful....no matter how hard you try to ignore the critism and hurtful things she says....Do you remeber being that age...I do I was a complete idiot.... Good luck.

Get yourself prozac, some hair dye to cover all the grey she is going to give you, hide your perfume, makeup and jewelery and anything else that is precious to you !!! LOL ! No, seriouly, my daughter is 17 and I'm still at my wit's end. I do find that it helps to spend more one on one time with her. Try treating her as an adult and talk talk talk. Of course you is not going to take your advide, but you feel better giving it! Make a rule that when she is moody, she stays in her room until she is more herself, otherwise she will take it out on everbody - I wish you lots of luck and if you wanna chat, please feel free, I know sometimes I need somebody that understands. (My husband does't understand the girl thing)