Does anyone have, or know someone whose has a loved one overseas?

United States
October 21, 2008 6:17am CST
I ask this because I am curious as to how they handle it. It could be for the military or for government contract. My husband is in Iraq, as government contractor, he is on a military base. He has been over there since June but sometimes it feels like an eternity. Sometimes I have a hard time handling everyday life. We have two boys ages 11 and 13. This is the first time, that they remember, being away from their dad and they are having a hard time with it as well. I know there are support groups for the military families but there doesn't seem to be much for the rest of us who are trying to handle this. I am interested to know how you cope with the stress that goes along with this situation.
3 responses
@Shar1979 (2723)
• United States
21 Oct 08
oh wow i feel your pain. where is he based there? My husband is in Balad Air Base. the only time we get to see him is during his r&r every 3 months. it's really painful coz it's like i dont know if we'll ever see him again. it's really a hell hole there
• United States
22 Oct 08
That is where my husband is. I haven't seen him since June. He comes home for his first r&r on October 31st.
@Shar1979 (2723)
• United States
22 Oct 08
My husband has been there for more than 2 years already. It's really a hell hole there and there are times that they are in alert yellow. is he a soldier? merc? construction? my advice to you is to send him lots and lots of medicine for cough and cold. since he'll be on r&r this month....make sure you give him vicks formula 44. it's gonna be way to cold there and they always run out of medicine in PX
• United States
23 Oct 08
He is actually a mechanic. He has already been sick for awhil but I plan on sending quite a bit of stuff back with him. He sent me his footlocker with things for me and the kids so I am going to load it up and ship it out about 4 days before he goes back with everything in it that he needs. thank you for the advice.
@iamcdy (1120)
• Philippines
21 Oct 08
Long distance relationship works but it depends to the persons involved in the relationship. I find it difficult to maintain a relationship if the couple is apart, married or not. It is the hardest among married couples with children because only one person will take care of the kids and it is not easy to take care of the kids alone. It also affects the development of the children. It is important that both parents are always there for the kids. But due to more opportunities abroad, couples decide to stay away for a while, even for years just to work and give the family's financial needs. I think the best way to keep the relationship going is communication. A simple text message or email saying you miss and love each other matters especially when you are far away. For those who are left behind, I think they should trust their partners who left for abroad because it really is a stress if you always think too much.
• United States
22 Oct 08
You are very right. Our kids and myself keep in contact with him through email, phone calls and, on the weekends, webcam. He still plays the parental role of telling them what they can and can not do and getting on to them when they are doing something wrong. The ironic thing is that he thought our children wouldn't miss him. I tried to tell him they would but he didn't believe me. Now he knows different. There seems to be more respect and love all around.
• China
21 Oct 08
one of my female friend used to have distant relationship with her boyfriend while he is study in the US and she works in another country. it's been hard time for them for 4 years and now he had completed his studies and went back to where she is. luckily they're still happy together. but it's a minority case in my experience. distant relationship cause stress to both parties and would hardly last, but it still depends on how hard you've tried, at least one of them should be very loyal to the other and the other has to be very patient and they still need to communicate with emails, letters, calls, visits and so on. it's hard to keep distant relationship but it's possible!
• United States
22 Oct 08
It is hard but I think it has actually helped us learn to communicate with each other better and we definitely appreciate each other more.