Difference in Parental Values - Stepparenting

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Can we give a few examples of situations where you and your husband did not agree on how he is setting boundaries with his kids? I will start off. Here's a good one for ya'll. My stepdaughter lives with us full-time and just turned 17. Her boyfriend is the acting youth minister of the church SD attends and he is 20 almost 21. My husband thinks it is fine for the boyfriend to arrive at our house (usually between 8 and 9 pm) and stay until 11:00 pm on weekdays and 1:00 am on weekends in her bedroom with the door shut. Ummm, I was not allowed to do this at that age for any age in my parents home. Sometimes it gets disruptive because her room is next to ours and they are laughing and carrying on until those hours of night. My bedtime is around 10:00 pm and the boyfriend is always there. What are your opinions on this. It is causing a lot of problems for my husband and I. I feel like boyfriend should not be in her bedroom period unless the door is open and he should leave at our bedtime.