donno if he really loved me or he never did???

Egypt
November 19, 2008 7:38pm CST
stayed with him for 7 years,with love,fights and all thins tht came in a relation ship we broke up last year but still in contact as friends,froom time to time we talk and may b c each others,sometimes i feel he's still in love and sometimes i say how can he broke with me and ask for friendship if he loved me once,,i love him so much,,and i no it but i always ask my self did he really loved me b4???and if yes is he still in love with me???as he is saying he didnt get in any relation yet and we promised to let each other no if tht happened,,although i don think he will do it,mean to tell me he's in a relationship,he do care abt me i no,,but care is not wht i'm asking for ,may b he just care because of the years we shared together,,so can u help me in how to no if he loved me or if he still in love with me or no,,HOPE U CAN
1 person likes this
11 responses
• United States
20 Nov 08
I think he still cares for you. But that's about as far as I would go. It's difficult to judge when you don't know the whole story. I would say ask him and then see what he says. And please remember this piece of advice, it is short but totally acurate: "Do not make a priority of someone who only sees you as an option."
@efarmer (184)
20 Nov 08
The simple thing is that if he loved you then he would never have broken up with you. But if we still assume that he loves you then it has been a year since you broke up right? then shouldnt he have come back to you. I can see you love him very much and so are wishing that he also is in love with you, but just think if he loves you then he would be with you. He only wants to keep you also at hand so that he can atleast have someone if nothing else works out with anyone else. You dont deserve to be some backup of anybody. and if you are so into him then just ask him straight. or else let go him so both of you can start a healthier new relationship. hope this helps
• Philippines
20 Nov 08
First of all, I wanna tell you that I was having a hard time reading your post because you were using some TEXTSPEAKS... anyway, based on your story, it seems like the guy or should I say, both of you still have feelings like (care) for each other BUT no more LOVE thats why you both chose to break up with each other. Its hard to just forgot someone who is special to you, specially when you two had so many good memories. Its not easy to just ignore each other.. so you rather chose to be friends than to become lovers which doesnt work for you anymore...
• Philippines
20 Nov 08
Sweetie, I know how how it feels like to get out of a relationship where you still had so much love for the guy. You feel like how could that have happened to you when you still hang on to the hope that there is still love between the two of you. I also spent a lot of nights crying my head off. But I remember a saying "Know that when demigods leave, the gods arrive." I know that it may sound really hard to just pick yourself up, dust it off and move on with our life, but it is what you really have to do. If he never made an effort to keep you (who appears to have given him so much love) in his life, believe me, he will never make that effort ever. If one day, when you are both wiser and ready maybe your roads will lead you back to each other, then maybe it was meant to be. But love can only survive if you learn to love and heal yourself first. If it turns out that the two of you aren't meant for each other, have faith that something better is waiting for you around the bend. Good luck
• United States
20 Nov 08
Sometimes it seems so hard to say I will say or I will go. I notice the older I got the harder it was to put an end to a relationship. I may not be satisfied in one but yet I am afraid to be alone. Also, there may still be feelings of caring mixed in that make a person wonder if it is worth saving or fixing. It is hard to tell but after awhile a person just goes insane like me and says, "AAH! Leave me alone for awhile! I just need to take care of myself!"
• Philippines
20 Nov 08
Well, you know what its really hard to figure out if a guy is still in love with you. There are some instances that men is really hard to please and really hard to know whats on their mind. Sometimes it seems they like you and sometimes they're not so in your situation i guess for me he still care for you but not to the point that he still loved you because love has many borders and you cannot be sure what level of love he has for you. Maybe he loved you but not as a lover but as a person who still care for his special friend. I think he still value the relationship you had before that's why he still there for you and if you want to know if he still loved you maybe he's the one to tell you that.
• China
20 Nov 08
no one can refuse the feeling of true love. so if he loves u, he of course can't stand just being friends with u.
@cathya (705)
• Philippines
20 Nov 08
Its very difficult to find out, as for my opinion may he indeed loved you before because he was able to stay in your relationship for 7 years. you know sometime in a relationship (especially long ones) you can feel that you want to go out in that relationship but ones you did you will come to realize that you still need your partner so the tendency is you will crave to have the same relationship as you had before. my suggestion to you is since you're friends and i suppose you can still open up with him, may be you can asked it from him, talk to him about this matter, as they say there's no harm in trying, but before doing that you have to prepare yourself for his possible answers. are you ready if he'll answer "yes"? what if he'll answer "no"? what will be your reaction? you have to be ready to hear both positive and negative answer. Gud luck!
@tklich (391)
• United States
20 Nov 08
Sometimes the actual person involved doesn't even know if they are in love or not, let alone someone outside the relationship. No one can tell just from reading your paragraph if he is in love with you. Only he has the slightest idea if he is, or ever was for that matter. I have often asked myself if I am still in love with my first love. But the answer is no. Don't get me wrong - I am happily married now! But I will always have a place in my heart for him, for he was my first love. But it's a different kind of love. He is a different person now, a person I don't even know. Love is such a tricky fact of life, but something a person doesn't want to be without. All you can do is communicate with this person. Communication is the key to a successful relationship. You can't just keep guessing what this person is thinking, and you can't make him guess what you're thinking. Talk to him to find the real answers. Good luck with this situation, and I hope I have helped!
@n30wing (4771)
• Philippines
20 Nov 08
I think God 7 years and still your asking if he fell in love with you. Yes I think he loves you or even up to now he loves you. He wont communicate with you if he doesn't love you. It's not easy to move on when you got hurt, or still expecting anything it's just a matter of space to realize what went gone wrong.But still if I were in your situation I don't wanna expect. Still I wanna see that his happy. The care is still their. I'll just let it flow if he loves me God will make a way for us to go back together and fix our lives first. Anyway have a nice morning!
@lilaclady (28240)
• Australia
20 Nov 08
It is a very hard thing to try and figure other people out as we all think differently, we all feel differently, and the feelings between a man and a women are so complex because men and women think so differently anyway, love is so different in the eyews of men and women, I don't think we will ever be able to figure each other out...I think you you just have to try to take each day at a time and take your friendship for what is seems to be but maybe the best thing you can do is just go on and be happy in your life and maybe meet someone new that may be the only answer...