Divine Intervention Freaking Required

Tweet

Holy crap, words cannot possible hope to encapsulate the histrionics my computer is undergoing. Because 180 gigs is mere peanuts these days (and I checked, it wasn't taken up by the three things I use), I asked around about whether I should consider getting an external hard drive. Since nobody responded, I went ahead anyways and got myself a 1TB external hard drive. Then I noticed that it takes two days to move a file onto it. That's two days without turning the computer off. Since I knew there was a problem because there'd be no point in selling someone a hard drive that didn't run as fast as the hard drive they were already using, I decided to discover what the problem was, because problems with computers are always invisible, illogical, and irrelevant. So I turned it off and on again. At first I thought media had stopped running slowly, but when I paused to track back to a previous scene it went back to its one-frame-per-second intermittent skipping. I also tried this "TurboHDDUSB" program, but when I set the hard drive to "turbo" it now causes an instant blue screen of death crash whenever I load a file from the external HD. I turned it back to "Normal" but it still seems painfully slow when moving files onto it, and torrents now have to undergo a mysterious "checking" phase which takes usually longer than I'm ever on the computer for, netting me approximately 1.0kbps download speeds for unlimited uploads. What exactly is the point of an external hard drive if transfer speeds are so damn slow and transfer speeds mean everything? This is running slower than back when computers still ran off DOS.