I put my mom n a nrsing home and regret it to this day

@nana1944 (1365)
United States
January 15, 2009 5:19pm CST
I did put my mother in a nursinghome as none of my brothers or sisters would help me take care of mom. I was working in a nursing home as were my daughter and stepdaughter and my mother-in-law. My daughter and stepdaughter God Bless them, helped all they could. My stepdaughter also went to school. Mom's mind was like a little child and due to problems with my husbamd, I begaon to doubt my capabilites. Emotional and mental abuse go hand in hand and he knew what to do. I guess you could say I gave up time with my mom because he wanted to move to another state. To this day i regret letting hom control me and though he has been dead for almost 24 years. I still resent him. Have any of you ever had someone control you like this? Honest opinions, please and you input will be read.
1 person likes this
3 responses
@KrauseHome (36448)
• United States
26 Dec 12
I think no matter who we are, as well as no matter how old that we might get, there will always be times and things happen in our life we may always regret and wish that we could have changed. The thing is we all have choices. Just learn to live as life presents itself never regretting the past while looking forward to a wonderful future ahead as well.
• Philippines
22 Sep 10
Try not to feel bad about this anymore. As Moolahmagnet said, it's been years and the decision has been made. Don't be too hard on yourself, you were coerced by your husband. I think it would have been hard for you to take care of your mother in that state. My mother is only in her 50s, but she suffers from schizophrenia and depression. My sister and I can hardly take care of her, and we don't even have families of own yet. Regret is unhealthy; try instead to think of the good things like when you spent time with her and visited her. On the topic of control, yes. I have had my grandfather "control" me. When I graduated, he gave me an ultimatum, I have to find a job in 2 weeks, or else he'll kick me out without a penny. It was really unfair because it wasn't like I was just bumming around the house. I was constantly sending out applications to various companies, but no one seemed to like to hire me. I felt really bad because it was like he was lording his power and money over me.
@xboxboy (5576)
15 Jan 09
i worry as my mother is 80 next year and WANTS to go in to sheltered accomadation. i have a 16 year old boy and a 7 year old girl plus a premenstral wife! difficult! i feel she is putting me on the spot when she says she wants to go in a home. what really galls me is my two brothers make a good wage away from home.