why do men or women take on a lover when allis going great?

January 23, 2009 7:04pm CST
I wonder sometime why we do things like taking on a lover and risking to lose everything. I wonder what goes on in our minds for us to do so. Do we get a little crazy or like our mind is not in it's right frame of mind? What is it that goes on in ones mind that one takes that step to take on a lover when all is going grt in our lives. Great husband/wife,house, car, money in the bank etc etc.?
1 response
• United States
24 Jan 09
It's definitely not okay to do this. First of all, the person doing the cheating already "knows" they are hurting their partner. The cheating is out of selfishness on the part of the cheater. It's ALWAYS because there are problems in the relationship. That does not mean, however, that the problem rests on the shoulders of the person being cheated on. People bring baggage into relationships. Others bring juvenile attitudes. Other people are risk takers and think they will get away with it OR they need this stimulative behavior to feel normal. Whatever the case, therapy would definitely be helpful if you wish to continue in the relationship. Cheating doesn't usually happen just once.
• Canada
25 Jan 09
U R absolutely right! While the partner is going on with everyday life, trusting his or her partner, the other is giving what should be given only to their partner. It isn't always because there are problems in a relationship, many I met just loved to change...bodies. Others loved the thrill of the adventure, living on the edge. I know of one who didn't think it was wrong at all. Just loved having a lover and a husband which made her feel complete..go figure that one out. cheaters always get caught one day or another if not by their partner..God is watching and an angel is writing in their book what each one of us is doing in our lives. So we never win even if we don't get caught by our partners.