Can you forgive and forget after a couple of years?

Philippines
January 26, 2009 4:48am CST
I called the father of my ex boyfriend to greet him on his special day. And i didnt know that my ex is the one who answered the phone. I know its rude if i wont say hi or how are you. so i just ask him hows life. he told me that its okay. i dont know what to say. but deep inside me i can still feel the hurt and it really came back flashing on my mind. how about you guys if you were in my shoe will you ever forget and forgive?
2 people like this
9 responses
@zenki08 (700)
• Philippines
26 Jan 09
For me you should forgive but you should not force it. As the saying goes, time heals. If you want be free of worries and problems you should let go of your worries and pains.
2 people like this
• Philippines
27 Apr 10
Forgiveness should come in the right time. When all the pain already heals and each of you has already move on.
@celticeagle (98807)
• Boise, Idaho
26 Jan 09
Why don't you just send him a card on his special day? Calling seems to have given you some really harsh feelings so why put yourself through that? If you want to wish him a happy day then send him a nice card!
1 person likes this
@aisaellis22 (6449)
• United States
26 Jan 09
Hello markroderick! Well, it's still very hard to foget but easy to forgive. My husband was divorced for 3 years now. He got from a very bad divorced. I know that he forgave her but I can't tell that he can't still forget what she did to him. I can still feel the bitterness of his voice everytime he talked about her.
1 person likes this
@max1950 (2313)
• United States
26 Jan 09
i can, but i do know a few friends who have been holding a grudge for 10 plus year's why ? every day it eat's them up, now i know every mixture of oppisite 's don't work out but just look at it that way , you gave it your best try and life sent you in another direction probably to a happier time about to happen in your life, go with the flow. from experience time does heal i know it sux waiting and you've heard it before but good things will come in time.
1 person likes this
@siomaiii (238)
• Philippines
27 Jan 09
I think forgiving someone is a decision. Its really hard when you still have bitterness and resentment in your heart. Let go of all the pains and hurts that keep you from being happy. It is not that easy, but it is possible.
• Philippines
27 Jan 09
yes it is a decision because you really have to sort things out first if you want to forgive someone. though the pains is still there but time will heal all wounds right? thanks for your reply and advice.
@underdogtoo (9605)
• Philippines
27 Jan 09
Forgiving is easy. Forgetting is not. I think that people need to move on and forget too in order to be able to see what is in front of them which might be infinitely better than the one left behind. Cheers!!
• Philippines
27 Jan 09
thanks for the reply you're right that forgiving is easy but it is really hard to forget. i already move on but there are times that i still recall all that happened between me and my ex boyfriend. and i can still feel the pain but its not like before that i still cried. and right now i try to focus on my work and with my relationship with my current boyfriend. it is really true that i might find better than my ex.
1 person likes this
@ifa225 (11098)
• Indonesia
28 Apr 10
maybe forgiven, but not forgotten. I know it sounds selfish, but i am only human
@Jenaisle (3803)
• Philippines
27 Jan 09
It hurts but as time goes by, the wound will heal. Time heals all wounds. It will be a long time for it to heal. For minor wounds , it will take just months or days to forgive and forget. But forgiving and forgetting is also healthy for you. It reduces your stress and the bad vibes you have in your heart. It will set you free from the bondage of misery and sadness. Your reaction shows that you still have feelings for him. You should avoid contact so your wound will heal completely. Good luck and happy mylotting.
• Philippines
27 Jan 09
you know.. in case like this. it isnt easy to forget, but yes,,you can forgive him. but it depends on the reason for your pain..but as they say... time heals all wounds. u will get over the pain soon. and when you had found the person that's for you. . the one that will not hurt your heart.