At What Point Do You Have to Stop Listening???????????????

I have been in same situation as you and it is hard to keep on listening and giving advice when a friend just keep on doing the same thing. There must be something about the situation that really attracts your friend when she keeps on going back to the same situation despite the advice she has been given. Maybe she is not ready to hear the things that you are saying. The wish to change her life has to come from within and she might not be ready to give up her old life yet, but that is not your problem. It seems that you have already done everything you could to help her. You can offer help, but it is her job to accept your help.

The next time she asked you for advice, ask her "Do you want me to tell you what you want to hear, or what I truly think"? I suspect it won't be the latter. And at what point do you stop listening and put yourself first? NOW!!! As you have unwittingly and unknowingly become an enabler to this person. How many other friends do you suspect she has worn out, worn down and ultimately destroyed their friendship. Several I suspect....

As a friend, you have been patient, offered solutions, cared, listened and everything else in the book. You can only go so long without feeling that way. I say sit your friend down and tell her exactly as you stated here. Tell her that even as a friend you too have feelings and they are running thin. Explain that it is not fair to you and your friendship that she chooses to ignore your advice and yet still expect you to be there everytime time she repeats the same mistake. Give her the option to either try your advice out or just simply not come running to you, as it leaves you feeling useless and worn out from worrying about her. True friendship withstands everything, good and bad, wrong and right, tears and laughter. You have the right to ask her to stop puting you in the middle of what is right and what is obviously wrong in her choices. Good luck to you and your friend.