best and safest spanking

I don't agree with spanking either, but if you are a parent who wants to use it the rule of thumb is three quick swats to the cushioned area (their back end) with just your hand.

The best and safest way is not to spank at all! It's kind of strange that parents in countries where spanking is against the law get their children to grow up and be great persons. How old is your child? A one year old only words will not help - spanking will not help eiter. Children are born to co operate and they will as long as you let them. First of all ask yourself why is she acting like she does? Is it lack of attention, is it lack of sleep or is she hungry. Does you feed her nutritious food? Are you patient with her? I would recommend you to read Jesper Juul !