Toilet Paper Tax

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OK, I hear you thinking this can't be true, but sure enough, here in Canada we pay tax on toilet paper of all things. Not just one tax, but 2!! .... Please forgive me while I rant a while and waste both of our time :( This story happened the other day and I still haven't recovered from my surprise at being taxed for what I consider a necessity. I was shopping at my local grocer and didn't require a whole lot. I had cleaned out the cupboard below my sink and wanted to return the emptry beverage containers. Armed with $1.55 worth of returns and 2 Toonies ($4.00), I went to my favourite store. Toilet Paper was on sale for $4.97. Now I'm thinking, $1.55 + $4.00 should equal $5.55. I was surprised when the clerk told me I still owed her $0.03 (3 cents). How can that be I wondered? I got home and looked at my receipt, which I rarely do, and there I found my answer! Yep, it's true, 60 cents worth of taxes! The province of British Columbia values me wiping my butt at 35 cents and the government of Canada figures it is only worth 25 cents. Now I wonder how do they both come up with a different value as to what I would consider a necessity of life? I figure the health benefits alone of having their citizenry maintaining a hygenic lifestyle must surely save them millions each year? What if we revolted? There would be people crapping on the sidewalks alongside their dogs! They would need to hire extra staff just to clean up the mess, costing many more millions! I also wonder if there is someone who sits in the tax department, a plaque on his or her door saying something like: Tax Collection Agency - Toilet Paper Division. That must surely be a secure job? There is very little risk to the public from a roll of toilet paper, no paper cuts, no toxic risks. Perhaps one could get hit by the truck that delivers the stuff, but that surely is easily taken care of by the millions of dollars collected each year in this crazy tax grab? I betcha the Toilet Paper Tax collector is always under budget? I bet every week he meets or exceeds his budget? High income with low overhead = a massive profit? I don't know if I should stop using the stuff or get a job collecting the tax? Do you have to go to a special toilet paper university in order to qualify for a position with this government department? I wonder if experience over one's lifetime counts as a credit towards your degree? If anyone knows how this works, please let me know. I could use a secure job in these tough econmic times :P ~Garm