Which of you both is friendly parent and which is the disciplinarian?

@mansha (6301)
India
March 11, 2009 5:11pm CST
This is for the parents , as my hubby and I argue always. He says kids take him for grante while they fear me. I feel one of us should be the lenient one at least in the family. Once he had given a slight spank more like a pat to my son in anger and he had vomited and developed fever overnight and recently he gave a spank very lightly on the bums of my daughter and she is still getting up in the night crying that papa has hit me? They both love him too much probably thats why they can not take that from him. I tell him leave the disciplining to me you just pamper them ,he says they do not listen to him. Who in your family is more strict with kids or are you both strict?
1 response
• United States
11 Mar 09
Hi mansha: It's natural that a child experiences a bit of shock at a pat on the rear when they misbahave and have never had the experience before. Not to say they were hurt, but it appears as though their pride is afffected. However, every child needs a balance of nurture, and discipline. Usually the nurturing comes from the mother, and the disciplie from the father. But if you feel you have to take on the role, then your husband should support you. Raising children isn't easy, and doesn't come with a manual. But, if the two of you can't agree on this issue, then you have a more serious problem as the children get older as they will use it against you, and could drive wedge between you and your husband. Good luck.
@mansha (6301)
• India
12 Mar 09
We do not have that serious issue as such its just a friendly argument we have occasionaly thankfully. And yes I agreee its matter of ego getting hurt and I think my daughter is too sensitive as yesterday night alos she got up crying saying Papa has hit me, it was really touching and my hubby says he is goign to be careful with her tiny heart. He actually loves to spoil them and mainly because of that kids do not expect him to get angry even in the slightest. They will understand as they grow up.