Has anyone had encounters finding old high school flames that went wrong since..

United States
March 14, 2009 12:58pm CST
There were several guys that I dated in High School and a little beyond that. They were a lot of fun and we got along great but then one day, they just disappeared from my life and never gave an explanation why. It bothered me all those years. As time went on and technology changed the way we live our lives, I found a couple of them on Reunion.com and Myspace. I contacted them and they were very thrilled to hear from me. The thing is, now they say they made the biggest mistake of their lives giving me up... This is true but 24 years later is not the time to profess your true love, am I right? So they want to start all over and get another chance. It can't happen. My life moved on just fine and I have two great kids, two wonderful grandchildren and the perfect man..... The thing is, whyyyyyyyyyyyyy, After all this time would they suddenly realize they should have stuck with me the whole time? Has anyone else experienced this and if so, how did you react?
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8 responses
• Romania
30 Mar 09
Yeah, some people just do that. Is sadistic and selfish. they simply turn their back to people, with no apparent reason. Did I get the point? Don't ask yourself and do not suffer. They are like that, maybe they will change someday, maybe they won't, maybe they will apologize 5 minutes before they die. I don't wanna go too far with that, but is perfect if you don't go too far being hurt by those people. Just think how hard it is to speak the truth and be a correct person. Anything can be explained to people , or at least we should try to before .. leaving. I was like that a long time ago. Those times are gone, and I changed.
• Romania
30 Mar 09
Oh, and yes, happened to me... but, we were different, I could hardly recognize the old school friend under his new look. There comes a time when you remember things, or try to change them, or simply smell the past, youth.. eh
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• United States
30 Mar 09
Yeah, I have no hurts over it. Just a little comfused as to why people react that way.... It makes no sense. I'm one of those people that likes to make sense of everything.... It doesn't usually work out that way, but sometimes I find out the answers :-)
• Romania
31 Mar 09
Yes, and the answers are comfortable. When people leave like this, suddenly, is not because of us. But when happens to you it hurts somehow, so it's absolutely normal to seek for an explanation. By the way, remember Marlon Brando?
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• Dallas, Texas
14 Mar 09
Hmmmm - I think they are still talking out the side of their neck - They obviously never deserved you - not then and especially not now - If the were real and wanted to do the things it toke to keep your heart - they would have done it a long time ago - just like you are thinking - But they missed out and you got someone that will and does - I have a woman that I wish I would have professed my love to - we were friends - not lovers - I am still kicking myself in the butt for never telling her How I feel! I did everyting I could to find her and I finally did! Now I have gotten shy again - I don't want her to think I am some kind of pervert or something - ohhh what to do huh???
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• United States
14 Mar 09
You could tell her how you felt and see how she feels. But if she has moved on with her life and wants only a friendship, then you go with that and let it be a friendship. The two specific people that I am talking about expect me to just walk away from a good life to pursue a relationship with them. Not a chance in Hell will that ever happen. But I wouldn't have minded being friends with them. But because they expect more, I can't even be that.....
• Dallas, Texas
14 Mar 09
Yea - I am going to tell her - What is funny is that I think it is pretty obvious - I mean it has to be - I just can't say it. But she is still single and always loves to talk to me. I guess I need to tighten up my boot straps and stop being a whimp!
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• China
15 Mar 09
I think, to these guy, if they chose you years ago, they would say the same words to other girls. Some people always think that they would have a better life if they did or didn't do something before. But in fact, they did something else. They just get what they did. Just enjoy it. I think there is no need to regret.
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@meljessxena (2319)
• Australia
15 Mar 09
i think this does happen very commonly.. well they feel that they have missed out on something giving you up. i wouldnt give up what i have now to go back to my past, but i do think what would happen if (one in particular) did stay in my life and we worked things out, how differently my life would be right now and i seriously dont think i would be as happy as i am now. not sure why i feel that way but yeah...
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• United States
15 Mar 09
Exactly! That is how I felt and still feel. There is a reason that things don't work out!
@hotsummer (10376)
• Philippines
15 Mar 09
i had chance to meet some former school mate. but some are not actually my classmate just schoolmate. i just felt sad i was not able to go to the reunion. missed the chance to see them. and the worst thing i felt i let some or few friends down when i didn't come to that reunion. i didn't have friends or much friends. i had too few friends back then. and i didn't know actually who were my real friends were in high school. not until that reunion when they wanted to come to that reunion badly. that was only i knew that they were actually my friends cause they in a way missed me. and they felt so sad that i didn't were able to come. cause one friend told how bad they felt but they were not angry just felt bad that some things like reunion don't come or happen often. i just felt their sadness a day after that event when i didn't attend. and since then i just had this sad and lonely feeling every time i remember what i did. anyways, some of them are working in other countries that is why i can't see them when i want to. some things you will just learn the importance of it when you don't have it or lose it already.
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@ljbinkop (744)
• United States
15 Mar 09
Hi Dd! I think you are wise to realize that you should always be happy for what you have, and looking back is fun, but I eould never leave my wonderful life and family for a not sure thing from the past! I have of course contacted people from my past on Facebook, and it was a great walk down memory lane, but never for one minute did I think that it would be a good idea to change what is good in my life now! I love seeing what other people are up to in life now, but it was a long time ago for me, and all of our lives are changed. Nostalgia is great, but I don't get carried away with it. Great discussion.
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@yoyo2323 (465)
• China
15 Mar 09
i am a 20 years old girl.when i have a problem when i was grow up ,my mom told me one thing: she has met a guy who love her.when they daparted and then met again,the guy phoned my mom one night when he drank a lot.he cried and said he haven't stoppesd thinking about my mom,and missed her every day.when my mom told me this she cried too.but she is a sensible lady .she already have a happy family!so she won't give it up!of course my dad know nothing about this.and they are still in love.and the guy and my mom are friends!
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@ama101 (40)
• United States
14 Mar 09
ddhawkins, In my opinion, people often reacct this way becuase they have missed out on spending time with you. another reason they have moved on with their live and may have had some bad time's and are re living what experience's they have had with you and are imagining it bieng better with you instead of the path they have chosen to go. with that bieng said you have moved on with your life got married and had kids and granchildern(with no regret's), the grass is always greener on the other side when it is bieng visited again. for the first time in along time. It all boil's down to this it is a physcological thing that can not be answered of why, it is only their regret's. This type of thing has not happend to me, as i was a loner in high school and didnt spend much time with friend's out doing stuff we hung out at my house. Maybe also cause it is a generation thing iam 25 met my husband when i was 12 dated off and on till 18 and we got pregnant and married.though it has happend to him,(tis where my opinion comes from).