urggggg... my mother in law said what ???
March 30, 2009 9:46am CST
My mother in law and I have had a rocky relationship, but most of the time, I keep my mouth shut, and play all nicey nice.. Last night, my sister in law called to talk to my husband about something he had mentioned to his mother this past weekend. She was mad.. After about 5 mins of listening patiently I lost my cool. After 7 years of keeping my mouth shut, I blew a gasket. After everything was said and done, she informed me, that not only did she think I was a terrible mother and shouldnt have kids, My mother in law said that my youngest daughter was losing weight and malnutritioned, my son was pale, and not fed, and is going to end up in a hospital, and my oldest daughter, who is disabled, should be spoiled rotten and I just treat her like another kid. Now this is all hearsay, I understand, but yet, I could see my mother in law saying those things. I feel like a fool, for the last couple weeks I have been having a hard time.. Between the house, the kids, and my job, it seems like stress was piling up, and at the time, all I had was my mother in law to talk to. I thought it was great that I was able to be honest with her and about my struggle to make it all work. My kids are well taken care of.. sometimes my house isnt always clean by my kids are well fed, played with, loved and hugged. It seems like my husbands whole family is against me, and would love nothing more than to see my fail. This whole time, I have been kind to them, and do whatever they ask. I try to help them as much as I can. I truly do love them, but I am at the point where disliking them is simply not strong enough. I dont know what to do.. I dont want to lose my cool with her ( she has heart problems and was recently hospitalized, and i dont want to be responsible for anything that could hurt her ) But yet I want to call her, I want to yell, scream, and cry at her that I do the best I can, and I am not perfect. And at the same time, I dont want to talk to her, I dont want to confront her, I dont want to cause problems. Please.. what would you do ???
• United States
30 Mar 09
Sounds like hell on earth to me. I would keep my distance from your husband's relatives for a while until you can get it together. No parent in the world is perfect and God knows kids do not come with an instruction manual, but we do the best we can with what we have to work with. Keep your distance from them for awhile and talk to your husband about how all this drama with his family is hurting you and how he needs to stand up for you and say to his family, "the children are well taken care of, if they need something they will get it." Find some girlfriends that are married with children and vent to them about how your mother in law is, chances are they would have some of their own war stories too, and yours may not seem so bad especially if you hear their stories. Any way, if that doesn't help, then you can always discuss it here on mylot anonymously and get advice from all the girlfriends here.