relationship advice to all!!!!

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i had a horrible 20 years of trying to find the right one. horrible in that i think i would just settle for whoever wanted me. i just wanted to be loved, and someone to care for me. i also had a major problem with taking in 'man childs' where they need you to take care of them as if they are kids.. well, that had to stop as soon as i had my own kids! so i got me some divorce papers..there goes my life being blown up in front of my face, there goes me splitting up the family and ruining everyones lives blah blah blah.. anyways, we learn, that is what life is about. all the crappy relationships you've been in, or ARE in, your learning from it. the only thing here is, are your going to use your knowledge? or throw it away and keep making the same mistakes all over again? that's how i use to be..until one day i had an epiphany! I CAN BE HAPPY ON MY OWN! from that day, i was single. single raising my kids and i learned to do it, alone. i was so 'wise' by that time i wasn't about to take in anymore men for quite a while. i had to stop for a bit, get to know myself more, relax, and do things for me that would make me happy. i took a nice year long break, to get my head together. i ALWAYS knew what i wanted from a partner, ALWAYS knew what i needed, but kept sucking in the guys who were so wrong for me..but now? i can finally be happy on my own and know that no one else can truely make me happy but me. i must have my own 'hobbies' n 'activities' for me and only me forever. it's VERY important you do this! because it seems SO easy to get sooooo involved with your new found partner that you actually forget about yourself, and what USE to make you happy before you met them. because what if that relationship fails?? you have NOTHING to fall back on. if you do not love yourself, you cannot love anyone else. you HAVE to find ways to make your own life pleasing to you without relying on anyone else to do it. once you reach that point, only THEN are you ready to try again. after my year long break, someone came into my life. someone who had all the qualities that i wanted and needed for soooooooooooooooo long. even though i wasn't looking to get into a relationship, it's happened. i cannot throw a good thing away. i beleive once you are ready to accept the person who you'll end up with, he or she will come into your life out of no where :) but again, you must love yourself, you must love your life, you must be comfortable with yourself and your life. you must do things for yourself to tell yourself that you love you!! treat yourself! warning signs! it's only been a month with your new partner and your already thinking of what to write in the breakup letter your going to give him/her. yet you stay together trying to 'make it work', only knowing that deep down this is not what you want. "but maybe he/she will change!!! i have to keep trying!" NO!! don't EVER do that. no one changes. if he/she is not the one for you, then end it. don't prolong it only to still breakup years down the road, instead of a month along. any questions? i'd love to answer!!!!!! :)