Do your step-children listen to you and what about rules?

United States
April 5, 2009 4:44pm CST
My fiance has 2 boys, ages 10 and 13. If I ask them to do something, it falls on deaf ears. I have to ask them at least 3 times before something gets done. My fiance will let them ignore me until I get really irritated and then he'll speak up. Then he can't figure out why I ask him to tell his kids to do something. Um, because they won't listen to me? Plus we have certain rules they're all expected to follow. One example is, no drinking in the living room. But his kids will constantly go into the living room to drink and my fiance just ignores it. But when my son, who is 12, tries it, then my fiance gets after him to sit at the dining room table. We've been together for 5 years so it's not like I'm the new girlfriend or anything. His boys always listen to me and stuff when their dad isn't around but when dad's around....different story. I've tried talking to my fiance about this but he has one of those attitudes that his kids never do anything wrong. I think a good majority of the problems stem from my fiances attitude and he just refuses to see without blinders on. How about you? Have you ever had problems with your step-children? If so, what advice could you give to me?