Can you be friends with your children?
@melkbremomof2 (116)
United States
April 15, 2009 10:27pm CST
Is it really impossible to be your children's friend? I know people say "your their mother, not their friend" But can't you be both? I have 11 year old twin girls, and we are the best of friends. We have a very close and open relationship. We talk about everything. I love to hang out with them. I know it may not last forever, since we haven't even hit the teenage years yet, but Im just wondering, why can't we be friends. They know that I am mom and my rules must be followed, but we can still have fun together.
6 responses
@evaloua32347 (12)
• United States
17 Apr 09
I have three daughters,they are 23,16,14, years old. I have a very good relationship with all three. My girls tell me everything. I have told them that i don't expect them to be perfect,but being honest i do.Also, if they have a problem, i probably already know about it,before they even talk to me. The most important thing is to use the right judgement and callme if you need help, with no judging on my part. We'll discuss that at a later date.I try to discuss not demand of my girls, because they probably act like me when someone demands. not very good.We go to movies together,i am always at all of their school functions, with little prizes for them, that only a mom can do. My girls love this. They know that i'm their mom first and friend second.No matter what i will always love them.
1 person likes this
@tinam13 (839)
• United States
18 Apr 09
i guess i could say me and my mom are pretty good 'friends', we argue a lot. she makes dumb choices and it makes me mad, we are VERY different. I wouldn't say it's impossible to be friends with your kids. when and if I ever have kids, I would like to be close to them.
@neerajpandey_13 (1765)
• India
18 Apr 09
If you can do this then you are winner but this thing is not easy. If you are more friendly with your children then they start neglecting you, which is again not good fo your children.
@semispoiledgurl (176)
• Philippines
17 Apr 09
Of course! I don't see anything wrong with that. Based on my experience, I never have a relationship like that with my mother. She always wanted me to treat her as a mom only and not as a friend. I know it sucks because I couldn't tell everything to her so I constantly remind myself if ever I've got kids on my own, I would treat them as a friend not only as a friend but a best friend where they can talk everything to me. Also, I have friends who are very close with their mothers and I must admit I envy them.
@ddhawkins63 (682)
• United States
17 Apr 09
I have a very good relationship with my 23 year old daughter and 20 year old son. We can talk about nearly everything but there is still a fine line. I consider myself their mother above all else. If it comes between me being their friend and their mother, I will be the mother figure. I consider it to be a "limited" friendship because I don't want to know everything about my adult chidrens life, although I think I already know too much as it is. So I think that you can be friends to a certain extent but that you must draw the line and be the parent first.
