My, How I Love MyLot

United States
April 23, 2009 11:04pm CST
Where else can you express yourself and remain anonymous? Of course, you can tell as little or a lot as you care to; you can open up or close yourself off. I love this site because I can express myself without judgment; just some "loving concern" and advice. I have poured my heart out in some of the responses and some of the discussions and I've read some discussions that others have poured their hearts out in anyway they know how in a way just hoping for some kind of positive response from somewhere out there! It's hard for me to make friends and that goes way back to high school (where I was treated terribly and my mother constantly reminded me how popular SHE was and why couldn't I be popular like she was). She also physically and emotionally abused me. I was th black sheep in the family; everyone had dark hair and eyes and I have red hair and gray/green eyes and am a twin. She always favored my twin brother who treated her like doo doo, unlike me who from the time I started babysitting and then working at age 16, tried to buy her love by lavishing her with gifts. I always kissed up to her, too. I'll never forget the day I left for the Army. She stood out on the porch and growled at me "Don't you cry, don't you dare cry." She wouldn't take my infrequent collect calls from basic training and when I had a couple of weeks between basic and AIT, and wanted to go home, she gave me less than an enthusiastic reception. When I worked at a local grocery store as a cashier, she had a car and could've easily taken me to work; I told I'd give her money for gas, she said no and made me take a cab everyday. While woking at the grocercy store, she made me pay $200 a month rent, while my twin brother worked at a Steel Mill making about $20 an hour and didn't have to pay a cent. She went to her death bed resenting me for some reason. As God as my witness, I don't know what I ever did to her! Here I digress into the reason I love MyLot so much! You can go off onto any subject and never know who might be reading your discussion. I write this not for sympathy because I had a happy 19 year marriage (Bobby died in 2001) and he erased all the bad, along with the therapy I needed after he died and my two grandbabies give me more joy than I can say even though they live so very far way (I've been to see them three times and plan to go this summer again). Anyway, thank you so much for your site. I really, really, really enjoy it. I'm hoping soon I'll have the courage to reach out to make some friends!
2 responses
@cynthiann (18619)
• Jamaica
24 Apr 09
If you need a friend then shout and I'll come running! Pity your mother - what a lot she missed by not showing you love and affection. I wonder if your different colouring reminded her of some family member that she did not like? Who knows why people behave in such a way? Just hold on to the fact that you did not do anything wrong!!!! she did!!! I hope that you make lots of friends on Mylot. Everyone will support you and you will make so many friends. Blessings
@Theresaaiza (10466)
• Australia
24 Apr 09
Hi to you, wow, that's really a bare-all discussion you wrote there. Well that's one thing I love about myLot. I am sorry to hear about the bitter parts of your story and glad about the BETTER parts too. Yes, you can definitely ventilate here without getting judged. YOu can also meet similar cases and know how they coped up. Ieven get some tips on fashion, food, lovelife and so much more. Although there will never be substitute for building live and real friends, myLot is a good venue to open things out while staying anonymous. Happy myLotting!