Is it OK to hit children?
By catarina_rg
@catarina_rg (580)
Portugal
June 17, 2009 6:42pm CST
I don't mean beating them of course that is wrong, but if a child misbehaves do you think it's ok to give them a slap on the wrist or (i'm not sure of the right way to say it) to give them a slap on the butt?
Is it ok to do that while disciplining children? Do you do that? Or do you chose another type of punishment?
1 response
@okkidokitokki (1736)
• United States
17 Jun 09
You are about to get answers that vary from it being child abuse to hit at all for any reason to it being child abuse to not spank your child.
Personally I have, do, and will spank any child in my care IF it is necisarry. There are times when "no" or "don't do that" is just not sufficent.
Research shows that children are unable to reason, their brains are not developed enough. And so if the child has done or is about to do something that puts them in danger then yes it IS ok to swat or spank the child. I am also a big fan of time out (to me that means sitting in a silent room absolutly still for no more than two minutes plus the child's age)
Right now my 13 year old nephew is in trouble. Spanking would be pointless becuase he is past that age. But he is grounded from everything that requires electricity to work. As you can imagine he is either going to be absolutly bored for the next 2 days or he will become a better reader.
Spanking is definatly OK but it should be used as a last resort when nothing else will get the point across. There are so many other creative ways to punish a child that they will remember. For example: my house is spotless right now because being grounded at my house also means you clean.
@catarina_rg (580)
• Portugal
18 Jun 09
I must say I think I agree, but I think you don't need to actually 'hit' them, meaning you don't need to actually hurt them.
In my experience whe you spank them, even without it hurting them, the fear or humilliation is such that they usually stop, without being needed to actually hurt the child.
@okkidokitokki (1736)
• United States
18 Jun 09
you are exactly right. It is not the physical pain that makes the point. It is the emotional. Generaly you get the same response from telling a child that you are upset with them for being bad: it hurts their feelings and they want to do better.
Sometimes you have to hurt their feelings with a swat. In my experiance it is the knowledge that Aunt Pat actually spanked them and then put them in time out that hurts (far beyond any spanking I would ever give) But it is a very effective emotion that should not be taken advantage of because it can loose the desired effect: changing dangerous behavior.
