Drive

United States
July 10, 2009 7:40pm CST
Who has more drive in your relationship... you or your spouse? I am all about goals and having the things I want in life. My guy lets life happen to him. I get so frustrated sometimes.
3 responses
• United States
11 Jul 09
You sound a lot like me while your partner sounds a lot like my husband. I'm very motivated, confident, optimistic...yet the littlest things can get my husband overwhelmed. It doesn't bother me as much as it sounds like it bothers you. I like having more drive and having him back me up rather than vice versa.
1 person likes this
• United States
13 Jul 09
ok I want to sedn you a friend request. I think it bothers me because I thought the guy i would marry would be a great added peice to me being who i want to be but now i am seeing things in a different lite. Thank you.
• United States
14 Jul 09
You and I tend to think alike. :) I'm glad we're friends now! Your partner will always add to your best qualities if they are right for you...even if the woman and man roles almost seem switched. I have to constantly try to motivate my husband in order to get him to do anything, but it gives me a sense of accomplishment. For example, if it weren't for me he would have never gone back to school...I encouraged him there, and now he's getting straight A's. I don't care that I have to get on him about things, because I'm hoping I'm giving him self esteem little by little. :)
• United States
12 Jul 09
I understand your frustration. I'm the more motivated in my marriage. There are times over the years that this has become a real problem for me, because his participation was required or it held us both back. Otherwise I've learned to let him handle his things his way. This has nothing to do with loving him, because I do. This has to do with where we see ourselves going as a couple. I have to calmly explain how this feels to me and how important it is and how I would love his help and participation, so that I can get him motivated to get on board with what needs to happen. Once he gets it, then he's up for the project. I make sure to really acknowledge how important his motivation was to our success.
• United States
13 Jul 09
you have also help me to see that its not about how i love him its about me wanting to build a life with him.
@marguicha (83967)
• Chile
11 Jul 09
There´s always one person in a relationship who has more drive than the other. Sometimes is the man, sometimes is the woman. But however it is, you can´t change a person. You chose him as he is and either you put up with him or tell him you can´t live with him. Love has a lot to do with endurance. Prince charming is for the fairy tales and you wouldn´t want to be locked in a tower waiting for him. Be happpy with your acomplishments. Remember the reasons why you loved him in the first place. They are still there, I´m sure. Take care